The Line of Idling Cars in Front of the Masonic Trader Joe’s is Now Out of Control

Well, it’s come to this – L.A. style gridlock on the upper part Masonic Street in San Francisco. Why? It’s all to do with the Masonic Trader Joe’s near Geary Boulvard. Drivers seem to feel there’s no trouble at all with queuing up in their idling Toyotas, Hondas, and Subarus. So, this is what it looks like when the wait begins 600 freaking feet away from the precious parking spaces and neighboring Euclid Street starts to get blocked up. 

A few of these drivers don’t realize that they’re in the official wait-to-get-into-TJ‘s line because they can’t see over the crest of the hill. Too bad. But could there be changes coming to Masonic?

Cheer up, your space is only 200 yards away. What’s your coping strategy – do you leave your car in Drive and just press down your brake pedal for 15 minutes or do you put it into Park then Drive then Park then Drive…? Each method has its charms, of course. Click to expand:

What’s the solution? Will we get another TJ’s at the old Mervyn’s space down the hill? Not likely. Should you just try to find a parking meter sort of nearby? Sure, why not. Or just line up and wait patiently like everybody else.

These are the troubles you face when your favorite store in the whole world is just too darn popular. Amuse yourself by singing along in your car:

  • It’s milk, it’s bread
  • It’s the stuff on your list
  • It’s the strange little snacks
  • you end up buying instead.
  • It’s booze, it’s nuts
  • it’s pills, it’s peas
  • it’s the peanut butter made of sunflower seeds
  • It’s a box of soup
  • It’s a bell from a boat
  • It’s yogurt made from the milk of a goat
  • A bottle of juice with a crazy name
  • ten kinds of soy milk that all taste the same
  • a two dollar wine that tastes like four
  • all your favorite stuff they don’t have anymore
  • It’s the cashews flavored with chili and lime
  • It’s the bunch of bananas you buy one at a time
  • It’s the stuff that’s organic and the stuff that’s not
  • It’s the cars that won’t fit in the parking lot
  • Are you still reading? More after the jump.

  • It’s the bottled water they keep by the door
  • It’s the ginger soy dressing they don’t have anymore
  • A snort, a sniff
  • a gourd, a snack
  • It’s the apple juice that’s addictive as crack
  • It’s cilantro pizza
  • it’s organic lox
  • four fuji apples in a plastic box
  • It’s all the new products that come and go
  • the exact same sample five days in a row
  • It’s mint flavored dog food
  • it’s an ear from a pig
  • it’s your morning coffee in a cup this big
  • a handle that rips on a paper sack
  • That checker you like
  • who’ll never be back
  • It’s the plastic grapes hanging over the wine
  • It’s the guy with twelve items in the ten-item line
  • the electronic field that stops your cart
  • the blackboards covered with employee art
  • It’s a ball of ice cream that’s covered with flour
  • It’s the shelves that are empty by the dinner hour
  • It’s the beautiful moms in their yoga clothes
  • It’s our favorite place, it’s that store Trader Joe’s.
  • It’s the cage-free eggs that aren’t free range
  • It’s the canned corn label that they never change
  • It’s the cereal shaped like a little man
  • It’s those great tomatoes, for just a dollar a can
  • It’s five different flavors of lemonade
  • It’s dried bull penises done up in a braid
  • It’s the organic sugar that just won’t pour
  • It’s the aged gouda cheese they don’t have anymore
  • It’s cylindrical salmon
  • It’s pills that fizz
  • It’s aloe chunk juice, whatever that is
  • It’s the information that nobody reads
  • It’s a small watermelon without any seeds
  • It’s the oldies music they always play
  • It’s the guy who says, “Put that camera away!”
  • It’s the workers who smoke in the back of the store
  • It’s that guy Trader Joe, who’s not there anymore
  • It’s the manager who asks you to go
  • It’s our favorite place, it’s that store Trader Joe’s
  • From Carl Willet of Carl’s Fine Films

    Mike Bates, Harley Jessup, Eli Hollander, Enrique Coria (guitar), David Lisle (piano), McKell Smith, Craig Helmholz, Crescendo Studios, Rachel Hanson, Alessandro De Sogos, Don Smith, Scott Shell, Kacie Ratner, Susan Woolley, Libby Bass, Christina Landman, Tanya Lumbi, Joan Willat, Lucia Pastierovikova, Whitney Dobransky, Dave Thomas, Julia Ward and all other voluntary and involuntary participants.

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    5 Responses to “The Line of Idling Cars in Front of the Masonic Trader Joe’s is Now Out of Control”

    1. rynot says:

      these people are ridiculous. i just park across from tj’s on masonic evertime, get i and out before half the cars in that line even move.

    2. SlideSF says:

      And don’t forget: if you pull your car up so that it’s blocking the sidewalk, it will make your wait that much shorter. Pedestrians? Never heard of such a thing on Masonic!

    3. fmws says:

      a much better solution: go to TJ’s stonestown

    4. Philo says:

      It’s Masonic Boulevard

    5. sfcitizen says:

      Fair enough, but Google Maps and Thomas Bros. both have it down as an avenue the whole distance….