The SFMTA Gods Must Be Crazy – Absurd Painted Lines on JFK Drive Confuse Handicapped Parker

Let’s see, how can I phrase this? How about:

New JFK bike lanes are bad for everyone

Or this, whichever.

Now, on to new bidness. Check out these handicapped parking spaces on JFK Drive outbound just past the Conservatory of Flowers in Golden Gate Park.

The driver of the car on the right has a valid handicapped placard so she parked her ride right next to the blue-painted curb with her two right wheels well within the 18 inch maximum allowed under the law. Which would be job done in most places in CA. But what grandma doesn’t know is that this stretch of JFK Drive is now Harvard-Boy Ed Reiskin* Crazy Land.

In HBERCL, drivers should park their vehicles 18 feet from the curb, as shown by the jelly bean shaped Lexus** RX on the left.

Click to expand

Does this make any sense?

I’ll tell you, my nana isn’t driving these days owing to her recent stomach surgery, but what would I tell her if she wanted to park her Hyundai in GGP?

I’d tell her, welcome to Harvard-Boy Ed Reiskin Crazy Land. I’m saying that I feel sorry for handicapped drivers who are confused by the one-of-a-kind-in-the-world layout that was just installed to make a political point and to respond to pressure from local political groups. I’m saying that the SFMTA should take account of the users of JFK, you know, grandmothers from Nevada, families from Daly City, you know, the people who are invisible to the SFMTA. I’m saying I feel sorry for this particular*** frustrated grandmother.

Hey SFMTA! Your crazy painted lines are not a “huge success.”

Hey SFMTA! What are you going to do about fixing JFK Drive for its users? Oh nothing, because you think it’s perfect because it was just put in by the SFMTA?

OK fine.

But IRL, what you’ve done is not perfect.

Not perfect at all.

* Hi Ed! Hey, do you know what happened to Jin Lai last month? His guts were squeezed out of his body “like toothpaste coming out of a tube.” A better-run MUNI would have these guards installed 99.something percent of the time, right? And MUNI could be better-run using the same amount of money that we’re giving you now, right? Are you the best person in the world to run MUNI? Obviously, you inherited a bunch of ingrained practices, but you wanted this job, right? You get paid big bucks to do this job, right? What kind of grade would you give yourself on this incident, Ed? If it’s not an “F,” you’re in denial. Deep denial. 

**Grandma’s placard is almost certainly legit. The one on the Lexus has about a 50-50 chance of being legit. If it were a V8 or V12 Mercedes Benz, those odds would go down to about 10%. That’s how it goes with CA’s corrupt free parking handicapped placard honor system.

***She ended up hanging a Louie and motored off, as there were no spaces available at this time.

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4 Responses to “The SFMTA Gods Must Be Crazy – Absurd Painted Lines on JFK Drive Confuse Handicapped Parker”

  1. Mike says:

    We don’t generally judge designs by how the most clueless user interprets them, but that seems to be the rule with you (and Rob Anderson) and the rest of the JFK bike path-haters.

    The vast, VAST majority of drivers very quickly figured out how to negotiate the new lanes and parking arrangement. The ones who don’t get it need to get a clue. We shouldn’t be ripping out a good design (that most people are happy with) because a few people can’t figure it out – instead, we should be helping those people figure it out.

    Tickets are a useful behavioral corrective.

  2. sfcitizen says:

    Ticket nana because she parked the way that’s proper in 99.999% of blue curb area in CA? OK fine.

    This design is “good” because…?

    Most users are not happy with this crazy design.

    THe old design was a better design. Ask, Steven T Jones, for one. Is he a hater too?

  3. Rkeezy says:

    Step 1: Install rarely found and mostly nonsensical street markings for parking and driving.
    Step 2: Ticket offenders who can’t figure it out.
    Step 3: Insult and marginalize those offenders.
    Step 4: Profit

    “VAST MAJORITY!” Just like the VAST MAJORITY of commuters that bike to work and clearly endorsed these sorts of pea brained decisions.

    SFMTA’s data says the number of bicycling commuters is something like 3.5% of total commuters. Hardly a vast majority, a regular majority, or even a number of real significance. If cyclists knew what small percentage they were of the populace, they’d crumble (or call the data lies).

  4. DDD says:

    JFK used to be one of the most stress free roads to bike on. I curse the SF bike coalition whenever I take it now. You shouldn’t shun a group because of one move you disagree with but the disparity between how much I loved biking this road before to how much I dislike it now is just too great. They’ll never see another penny from me. Such an unneeded change done just because they could.

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