Archive for the ‘cars’ Category

Toyota Prius vs. San Francisco Telephone Pole, Chapter CCCLXIV

Thursday, April 17th, 2014

Toyota used to build man-sized front airbags for beefy gents such as myself, but those days are over.

These days, airbags are smarter but less powerful.

Anyway, this car fully deployed its airbags on Oak yesterday – let’s hope this local is all right:

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Metal SFMTA Sign: “SCOTT ST. TRAFFIC CIRCULATION CHANGES” – But Shouldn’t It Say “TRAFFIC RESTRICTIONS” Instead?

Wednesday, April 16th, 2014

I think so.

I think the SFMTA, which recently “turned its back on your safety,” wants to shut down part of Scott Street

Oh here we go:

“Scott Street will no longer be a convenient route for driving in the southbound direction.”

What the SFMTA is saying here is:

Scott Street will no longer be a possible route for driving in the southbound direction.

Hey SFMTA, instead of all this, why don’t you say what you mean and mean what you say?

Rolling In My Six-Four OR Rolling In My Oh-Point-Five: Either Lyric Works! – California Man Enjoys His Red Morris Mini-Minor

Friday, April 11th, 2014

YOLO, baby:

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Resolved: There Should Be No Left Turns Allowed at Market & Octavia – Fixing the Legacy of Wealthy Hayes Valley “Activists”

Monday, April 7th, 2014

Here’s a view of Market Street outbound at the Octavia intersection. All these people heading west to go home have to wait an extra ten seconds for the richers of Hayes Valley to drive their Audis, BMWs and Mercedes Benzeses onto northbound Octavia from inbound Market Street owing to a dedicated left turn lane with a left turn arrow. Why?

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Octavia Boulevard has been a disaster. The reason why is due to rich, land-owning “activists” of Hayes Valley having too much control over the process. Why on Earth should we shut down the intersection for 10 seconds each traffic light cycle just so that four, three, two, one, or sometimes zero luxury cars can turn onto Octavia?

Hey SFMTA! Don’t you want to speed things up for MUNI? So let’s just alter the light timing here and make any and all left turns illegal? If these people want to turn left to get north of Market, why don’t they make the turn legally at the intersection before and the intersection after, you know, where turning is less disruptive to everyone else?

Just asking.

The Phrase Our MSM is Struggling to Find this AM is “Smart Car Tipping” – Or “Smart Tipping” – “SPRING BREAK!”

Monday, April 7th, 2014

Via Caleb, leader of the PandaRevolt:

Found on my street this morning: the problems with owning a Smart Car. pic.twitter.com/aIegONHPg3

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This is a thing in Canada, where’s it’s called Smart Tipping

Soon enough, the SFPD will warn smartcar owners to park these toys in a garage or backyard at night, you know, for security.

When Smart Cars started showing up in the 415, what I thought we’d see was:

1. Smart Car tipping (Naughty naughty!); and

2. French-style, nose-to-the-curb parking

It Has Come To Pass.

Remembering the 1980′s – This is Exactly What It Looked Like – People Were Thinner, They Dressed Up, Drove Ford Fairmonts

Friday, April 4th, 2014

As seen in Civic Center, 2013:

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That’s not really a boxy Ford Fairmont, it’s a boxy Mustang* LX. I had me one, with the same dog-dish hubcaps, bought at police auction, 90,000 miles. Sold it back in the ’90′s. I dressed up more back then, I was thinner too.

Anyway, this guy is rolling 1980′s-style – he really stands out from the crowd when you see him. Look for him on Larkin.

*But both were Fox platform rides and basically the same thing. Engineers from GM called this Mustang “the best damn Ford Fairmont ever built,” you know, as an insult.

An Extraordinary Case of Close Parking – Side-by-Side, Against the Rule – Civic Center, SF, CA, USA

Friday, April 4th, 2014

IF the drivers of these cars don’t know each other, then this was an act of hostility:

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Now I’ve seen people getting boxed-in nose-to-tail  after parallel parking, but never this.

Never this!

Double Double Parking on Bush Street: It’s the Christian Thing To Do – Even on a Saturday – In Fact, Every Saturday

Friday, March 21st, 2014

Of these five lanes of Bush Street, the heathens park in lanes 1, 4, and 5 while the Christians dominate lane 2, and everybody else in the world gets lane 3, you know, to actually drive on.

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I cry foul.

Some People Just Shouldn’t Be Driving: BMW Pilot, Double Face-Palm, All the Way

Monday, March 17th, 2014

Now IRL, this BMW driver had her face in her palms for a good 20 seconds while stuck two yards north of the stop line on Masonic northbound at Fell.

But let’s say you don’t believe me and you say that she had the green, but then why is she driving like this with her eyes covered?

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In conclusion SPJSBD (Some People Just Shouldn’t Be Driving).

I mean, if you’re tired, take a rest.

And if you’re emotional, take a break first.

And only then fire up your Driving Machine.

(And, oh yes, SFGov, in its wisdom, decided to put the stop line a waaaaaaay back at this particular intersection. So if you want to turn left and you’re not sure you’re going to make it before the red, then you shouldn’t cross into the crosswalk. However, once you’ve gone into the crosswalk, you’re committed to making that turn and what you should do is creep forward and turn on the current light cycle. It Is Written. I mean, otherwise, you end up with this mess, stuck in a crosswalk for one minute-plus. Bad form, Missy.)