Posts Tagged ‘2015’

IT’S COME TO THIS: The Doughbies “Doughbus” Will Deliver Freshly Baked Cookies to You Within 20 Minutes? IS THIS REAL LIFE?

Wednesday, November 25th, 2015

I haven’t checked up on this ad yet, but I gotta say that I don’t think Doughbies is going to make it as a company.

7J7C0281 copy

(And that’s my Haterade, sorry.)

And what if the Doughbies deliverer only had to give you something intangible, say something like a kiss on the cheek? Well, even then, I don’t see how this app could deliver. So like the deliverer would go to Nob Hill and park and then make it to your place in 20 minutes? How is that possible? Oh, the driver would illegally double park? OK well, maybe.

And didn’t pizza delivery places have to walk back promises of DELIVERED IN 30 MINUTES OR IT’S FREE due to getting sued over the concomitant reckless driving? I think so.

Or you’re going to use bike riders? Or scooters? IDK, man.

Oh what’s that, I’m hurting the “feelings” of the Doughbies all-seeing, all-knowing Founder(s)?


Oh what’s that, it’s good to fail, to give it a shot? Well, sure, for you, the Founder, using Other Peoples’ Money and then failing, well that could be a great career move. But this process might not be good for a lot of other people, don’t forget.

Oh yeah

[UPDATE: Oh I see. Delivery is restricted to the Financh and neighboring SoMA. So that’s why you advertise in the fucking Richmond District? OK fine. Yes, they do use bikes. But no, the 20 minutes isn’t really a serious thing. And of course, it’s only curbside delivery. So fine, but you shouldn’t address your pitch to “San Francisco” is all I can say…]

Why Peds Hate Prius Drivers, Ch. MMCCLXVII

Wednesday, November 25th, 2015

They’re still the worst drivers, after all these years:

7J7C0282 copy

SFMTA MUNI Stares Down Mental Illness in Front of Twitter HQ – One Reason, Just One, of Why VisionZero 2024 is Impossible

Wednesday, November 25th, 2015

Oh here we go, here’s a 21 Hayes operator at 10th and Market. (Hey, you know the slow and inefficient #21, right? It comes to us, at great expense, via our slow and inefficient SFMTA.)

Anywho, here’s the scene, the driver with a green, the ped with a fierce attitude problem – it’s a staring contest:

7J7C0291 copy

But let’s start at the beginning where Just Do It ambles against the red heading inbound on Market:

7J7C0288 copy

And reaches the safety island. All the other peds stop for their red, but Just Do It doesn’t break stride, oh no. Now, here come the bus:

7J7C0289 copy

What’s the ped’s message here? It’s like go ahead and run me down – make my day. Go ahead and just do it is what Just Do It is saying, more or less.

7J7C0290 copy

While driving, biking or walking about town, I blithely assume that all pedestrians will manifest mental illness. Is that so wrong? I think not, obliviously.

OTOH, our SFMTA considers all peds perfect, perfect people – perfect people who make the occasional “mistake” by purposefully walking into traffic.

And DYK that the cause of most ped deaths last year in SF County was the peds themselves? Our SFMTA seems to ignore this reality. (Do you want to get into this, start talking about vehicle code violations and whose fault is what? I can do it. I have done it, AAMOF.) But Reality doesn’t win you any votes at the ballot box, and it doesn’t make Uncle Sucker want to send us some more sweet sweet pork from DC, so that’s why our SFMTA isn’t interested in Reality.

What will be the consequences for the people today spouting VisionZero 2024 when 2024 comes and the promises of VisionZero 2024 don’t? Nothing, absolutely nothing. Oh well.

If SFGov wants to legislate away all transportation deaths in town by 2024 and into the future, forever, it would need to be able to magically cure all mental illness, and even then it would fail. Really, SFGov would need to eliminate transportation altogether.


Men Ruin Everything – Men are Pigs – Rear Window Stick Figure Family Portraits Ruined by “Making My Family”

Tuesday, November 24th, 2015

Riffing off of this type of thing, of course.

Men Ruin Everything:

7J7C6589 copy

Men are Pigs.

Area Conspiracy Theorist and SALON Founder David Talbot Goes Off the Deep End – New Book Goes “Inside the Plot to Kill JFK”

Tuesday, November 24th, 2015

Here’s what HarperCollins went for:

The Devil’s Chessboard: Allen Dulles, the CIA, and the Rise of America’s Secret Government

And here’s just one clause, addressed to:

“Those resolute voices in American public life that continue to deny the existence of a conspiracy to kill President Kennedy…”

So, Oliver Stone had JFK,* and now David Talbot has this.

And so, if you think it’s possible that Oswald acted alone, as he did before (trying to assassinate a retired general earlier in 1963) and after (killing a Texas peace officer shortly after shooting JFK twice)**, then YOU crazy, then YOU in denial. Is that how this works?

And the way to earn respect from both Stone and Talbot is to start believing in a JFK conspiracy theory – any theory will do. ‘Cause believing in any crazy theory means that you don’t believe in the hated “official version” of how JFK was murdered.

And that’s good enough for them.

And what’s the official version? IDK. It starts with the Warren Commission, but it doesn’t end there. The official version is our best guess of what happened based upon what we’ve learned the past half century.

So that’s that. All’s what left to do is to wait for the book tour to wind up on KQED Forum…

Yours, in denial…

*Where do you want to start with the JFK? Here? Here?

**Oswald, the former Marine Corps marksman, was a gun nut who liked shooting military and paramilitary authority figures – it was his thing. For example, before he shot and killed Commander-in-Chief JFK, he shot retired U.S. Army General Edwin Walker (with the rifle Oswald bought mail-order, the very same one he used to kill JFK). And then, after he shot and killed JFK, he shot and killed Dallas Police Department Officer J.D. Tippet and then he attempted to shoot Dallas Police Department Officer N.M. McDonald.

Area Planner Brings Street Chess Back to Mid-Market – How “Urbanists” Envision Our Future

Tuesday, November 24th, 2015

Here it is, not too far from notorious 6th Street, a Vision of the Future:


(Complete with smiling peasants, Comrade. This woman prolly scored some happy drugs around the corner on Golden Gate Ave.)

I had to “enhance” the illustration to see what was going on here, but this sure looks like a riveting game of sidewalk chess, which used to be a scene close to 5th Street and which then got kicked over to the other side of 6th Street and which then got regulated out of existence.

But along with the chess came sidewalk craps, shielded from view by the chess people. Other things came along with the chess as well and that’s what led to its demise. One wonders why our City Family kicked the chess ppl out from 5th and Market in the first place…

EVENT: “Affordable Divis Community Planning Workshop” Coming to THE INDEPENDENT Saturday, December 5th 2015 – Character, Housing, Transit, Infrastructure

Monday, November 23rd, 2015

7J7C0268 copy

AFTER BARTY: I Finally Understand Lyft’s new FRIENDS WITH TRANSIT Campaign – But Lyft has NO IDEA How Slow our SFMTA MUNI Can Be

Monday, November 23rd, 2015

Here’s a new one – another Friends With Transit ad:

7J7C0257 copy

Now this ad I get – it’s saying how Lyft can become your “last mile” transportation solution.

Fine, but this ad here, the one I saw first seems to equate our MUNI METRO service as something akin to a fast, reliable transit system. Perhaps it might seem that the 415 has something like that to young people in NYC or whatever or whomever or wherever, but IRL you wouldn’t suffer through an N Judah ride only to take a Lyft taxi a few hundred yards north to (your home / tent / self-dug hobbit hole in) Golden Gate Park.

Now, why would our slow, corrupt SFMTA appreciate these ads? Well, it’s money for partner ClearChannel and the SFMTA, plus it’s saying how Lyft is compatible with transit, as opposed to, you know, Lyft “disrupting” the SFMTA by siphoning money away from it.

So IDK, Frisco has a ton of bus stops all over town, so I think ppl would simply walk the last quarter mile or less it takes to get home. Perhaps this ad campaign makes sense in less urban areas?


A True Artist Knows That All The World’s A Canvas Waiting for the Right Tagger to Come Along…

Monday, November 23rd, 2015

7J7C0261 copy

7J7C0263 copy

You Can’t Keep Flappy Bird Down – Remember, Christmas is Coming – Recalling the Biggest App of 2013

Friday, November 20th, 2015

This is Flappybird’s last hurrah, I’m afraid.

20150927_131322 copy

2013 is now long, long ago…