WELL, HERE IT IS.
‘Why the 2014 Election Matters for SF Tech Workers – Elections matter. Tuesday’s election is extremely significant and symbolic for the tech community.”
WELL, MAKE UP YOUR MIND, DUDE – WILL IT BE SYMBOLIC OR WILL IT BE SIGNIFICANT? IN FACT, IT WON’T BE “EXTREMELY” ANYTHING.
Given all that’s been thrown at the tech community over the past year, Tuesday November 4 represents the one solitary day where the tech community can come together, exercise its electoral muscle and lets its growing voice be heard.
WHAT? SO THEN WHAT’S THIS, BROCEPHUS? IT’S “Leveraging the collective power of the tech sector as a force for civic action in San Francisco.” HAVE YOU HEARD OF THAT OUTFIT? MAYOR ED LEE SURE HAS. IN FACT, HE’S SO SMITTEN WITH MONEY FROM CON RONWAY AND OTHERS THAT ED LEE NOW IS FACING A CHALLENGE FROM A MEMBER OF HIS OWN POLITICAL FACTION IN HIS OWN POLITICAL PARTY. AREN’T YOU AWARE OF ANY OF THIS? ALSO, BRO, MOST TECHIES LIVING IN SF DON’T ACTUALLY VOTE BY GOING TO THE POLLS ON A TUESDAY, SO IT’S HARDLY “ONE SOLITARY DAY” AT ALL…
So what’s at stake? In our recent 2014 voter’s guide…
SO WHO’S “OUR?” YOU MEAN “MY,” RIGHT? YOU’RE LIKE ONE DUDE, RIGHT BRO?
…Techies Who Vote…
“TECHIES?” ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS? ISN’T THAT A PEJORATIVE TERM? IS THIS YOUR ATTEMPT AT REAPPROPRIATION? WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU CALL YOURSELF A “TECHIE?” IS THIS A PARODY WEBSITE?
David Campos voted against the tax breaks for tech companies setting up shop in the mid-market area…
GOOD. ‘CAUSE THAT’S CORPORATE WELFARE RIGHT? AND THE GENESIS OF THAT CORPORATE WELFARE COMES FROM A TIME BEFORE YOUR ARRIVAL IN THE 415, POSSIBLY – HERE YOU GO, DUDE, ENJOY.
“An independent report released by the SF City Controller this past week revealed…”
WELL, NUMBER ONE, THE REPORT COMES FROM THE VERY GOVERNMENT WHAT’S ALREADY BEEN CORRUPTED BY “TECHIES.” AND NUMBER TWO, ‘AS FOR THE TAX BREAK’S OVERALL IMPACT ON THE CITY’S ECONOMY, THE REPORT SAYS IT WAS PROBABLY ‘QUITE LIMITED.‘” SO WHERE’S YOUR MESSIAH NOW, DUDE?
…while revitalizing a depressed neighborhood in the mid-market area…
DO YOU THINK MID MARKET HAS BEEN REVITALIZED? WHAT ARE YOU SMOKING?
[BRO'S DAVID CHIU HAGIOGRAPHY OMITTED]
Proposition A is a transportation and Road Improvement (Bond) that provides $500 million to fund transportation projects and capital improvements for MUNI transit and for upgrading city streets.
NOPE. WHAT IT IS IS FREE MONEY FOR SFGOV – THERE’S NO OBLIGATION FOR ANY BODY TO SPEND ANY MONEY ON ANY PARTICULAR THING. WELCOME TO SF, BRO.
…our future as a world-class city.
ARE YOU A REAL PERSON DUDE? WHAT YOUNG PERSON TALKS LIKE THIS?
Proposition B is a population-Based Adjustment to General Fund Appropriation to Transportation Fund (Charter Amendment) that increases the voter-approved funding set aside for MUNI to reflect past ten years of population growth…
UH, THE SFMTA’S BUDGET HAS EASILY OUTPACED THE PAST TEN YEARS OF POPULATION GROWTH, RIGHT? DON’T YOU KNOW THAT?
OH, AND DUDE, YOU HAVE NO ENDORSEMENT FOR YOUR SEVEN READERS ON PROP E, THE SODA TAX? OH, BECAUSE IT DOESN’T HAVE “A DIRECT EFFECT ON TECH WORKERS?” WHAT? OF COURSE IT’LL HAVE AN EFFECT ON “TECHIES.” OBVS. AND YET YOU DO HAVE AN ENDORSEMENT, FOR YOUR SEVEN READERS, ON THE MINIMUM WAGE INCREASE? DO YOU THINK IT HAS A “DIRECT EFFECT ON TECH WORKERS?” SO DO “TECHIES” IN SF MAKE MINIMUM WAGE – ANY LAST ONE OF THEM?
ALL RIGHT, BROCEPHUS, IT’S BEEN REAL…