You know, arguably.
Not a large sample, of course.
Does the SFPD drive its big Ford Crown Victorias ‘neath the first reinforced concrete bridge built in America just to chat with area drug dealers? Yes, yes it does. Officers simply drive past the world’s smallest lake (sadly just two-star rated) and then under Kezar Drive.
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And then they hang a left to do a little 2WD off-roading.
Oh, what’s this, lazy drug dealers who don’t know enough to run away? In this case yes. But in other cases, more motivated dealers hoof it up the hill and across three lanes of traffic on Kezar Drive.
On it Goes…
Yes, everything that ever happens in your life has to do with your ethnic heritage, apparently.
That’s the conclusion you might come to after reading this tale from area attorney Rodel Rodis. It started up ten years ago and ended up involving a former Assistant City Attorney by the name of Scott Wiener.
All right, Rodel, the SFPD took you into a station after thinking you were trying to pass a fake $100 bill, but actually it was real, so look sad, come on, sadder, sadder, cleek:
Uh, dude, you’re telling your story wrong.
And I’ll tell you, if you ever find me with a $100 bill, I’ll know exactly where I got it from.
And you’d think somebody could have entered the phrase “1985 $100 bill” into the Google earlier in this process, back in the day, but oh well. (And IRL, a teller supervisor at a bank in the pre-Internet era could examine a bill and then contact the feds in a New York minute, you know, to check the serial number.)
And if Walgreens ever sends me a giant bouquet to turn my frown upside-down, I’d tell them they should have simply handed over the bouquet money directly to me.
But, In mitigation, you went to the former New College of Law and then, unlike most of its graduates*, you passed the CA bar exam. So good on you. Srsly.
And you escaped the college board before City College came crashing down, so that was a good move as well.
All right, let’s look forward to this incident’s 20th anniversary in 2023, when we’ll surely hear this tale again…
*Such as your fellow area minor celebrity, the ivory-white “Ivory Madison.”
Well, look what the SFPD is crowing about today:
“SFPD Arrest MUNI Pickpocket Trio
San Francisco police officers arrested three men acting together to pickpocket Muni patrons. Taken into custody November 29 were Miguel Lucana, 42, of San Francisco; Antonio Martinez, 34, also of San Francisco; and Juan Gonzales, 38, of Oakland.
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“On November 29, shortly after 3:00 P.M., two plain clothes SFPD officers assigned to the Muni Task Force were at the bus stop at Geary and Powell streets preparing to board a bus as part of ongoing efforts to help prevent pickpocket thefts on buses. One of the officers recognized Lucana, who has prior police contacts, standing at the bus stop with a t-shirt draped over his shoulder. Typically, a pickpocket will conceal his arm and hand during the theft attempt.
Standing next to Lucana on the crowded 38 Muni, one of the officers saw him attempt unsuccessfully to furtively open the purse of a woman standing next to him. Lucana then moved to another part of the bus, where he spoke with suspects Martinez and Gonzales. Pickpockets often work in pairs or more. One passenger on the bus reported that his wallet was missing
All three suspects were detained in the vicinity of Post and Fillmore streets. Police recovered the victim’s wallet, which had been in Lucana’s possession.
All three suspects were charged with theft and conspiracy and remain in custody.
“I am extremely proud of our Muni Task Force for everything they do to help keep this system safe,” said Ed Reiskin, SFMTA Director of Transportation. “Their dedication and hard work further ensure that those who commit crimes on Muni will be brought to justice.”
The San Francisco Police Department reminds the public to be vigilant of their belongings and surroundings in crowded public spaces, and especially on public transportation. Keep wallets in a front pocket and purses within sight at all times. Be wary of any abrupt physical contact or suspicious behavior. Citizens are also advised to use electronic devices sparingly in public, as criminal opportunists take advantage of citizens distracted while using these devices.”
Nine years and something months later, the SFPD makes an arrest:
“SFPD ARREST SUSPECT IN 10 YEAR OLD BRUTAL COLD CASE SEXUAL ASSAULT
11-103 Posted Date: 9/27/2011
The San Francisco Police Department’s Sex Crimes Detail Cold Case Unit made an arrest in a 10 year old sexual assault case. The incident occurred on November 6, 2001 in San Francisco, CA and the suspect was arrested on September 26, 2011 in San Jose, CA. The victim in this incident was offered a ride from the Mission District to her home. The three suspects then drove with the victim to Golden Gate Park and parked their car in an isolated dark area of the park were they sexually assaulted and robbed her. The victim was then ordered out of the suspect vehicle and had to flag down a passing motorist for assistance.
Due to the diligent work of the Sex Crimes Unit and Violence Reduction Team, in addition to the advent in today’s technology, the San Francisco Police Department was able to identify the suspect as Vinh Q. Chung, Vietnamese, Male, 10/26/1981. Chung was taken into custody at his home by members of the San Francisco Police Department’s Violent Reduction Team. He is currently being held at the County Jail in lieu of 5 million dollars bail.”
How about that?