Posts Tagged ‘audi’

Clean Diesel? Does This Audi TDI Diesel “Protect the Environment” and Would You “Look Good” “Doing It?”

Thursday, October 31st, 2013

IDK.

Remember ethanol? It’s still around I guess. Ethanol sucks.

So ask me in forty years or so and I’ll probably have an answer about the merits of “clean diesel.”

As seen above TJ’s #100 on Masonic:

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A California License Plate That Reads “SQUAW?” – Didn’t Oprah Say That Word Means “Vagina?” Yep – Is This Offensive or Not?

Thursday, June 6th, 2013

I’ll tell you, the chances of some part of America, like the lake behind a new dam, getting named squaw-anything are about nil these days.

Check it.

But naming your aging Audi “SQUAW?”

Well that’s A-OK:

Remember, Oprah believes this word means vagina.

Oprah.

Why Has California’s Handicapped Placard System Turned Into a Free Parking Subsidy for the One Percent?

Tuesday, December 4th, 2012

Two luxury cars, two handicapped placards, yet again:

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Why is it that most Mercedes Benzeses you see parked on the street in the Financial District, you know, the 94111 and the 94104, have handicap placards hanging from the rear view?

Could it be that California’s handicapped placard system is being abused by wealthy bay area drivers who feel that parking should be cheaper and easier for them?

Yep.

Are you kind of a sucker for NOT having a handicapped placard considering that you could easily ask your doctor to sign the form for the DMV?

Yep.

Zoom zoom.

Matt Cain Giant Audi Billboard Evolution: From Striking Out Competition to PERFECTION to Visit My Friends

Tuesday, August 28th, 2012

Now see here, this is the way things used to be at Geary and Masonic, right near the deadly Masonic Trader Joe’s gro sto.

See? This ad from last year was horrible: 

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Then the local Audi people got rid of that billboard because the Giants were no longer champs.

But then, Matt Cain pitched his perfect game earlier this year, so up went a new ad:

It was much better, non? 

But now we’re back to this:

Now, does Matt Cain really have friends at Audi San Francisco?

I don’t think so.

And, think about it, does anybody really need an Audi?

I don’t think so.

Oh well.

In closing, Cain!

BMW Comes to San Francisco to Introduce Us All to DriveNow, ParkNow, and, I’m Seriously, ParkAtMyHouse

Tuesday, August 21st, 2012

BMW, the company what has “32 Rolls-Royce Motor Car” dealerships in the U.S., came to town yesterday to promote … BMW.

Hurray!

Deets below. Here’s your boner preview:

“An estimated one-third of all downtown traffic on weekdays is due to vehicles searching for a parking spot.”

ABSURD. DUDE DRIVES UP FROM SAN MATEO TO PARK AT 2 EMBARCADERO. FOR INSTANCE. HE MIGHT SPEND A TON OF TIME GETTING IN AND OUT OF THE FINANCH, SURE, BUT ZERO PERCENT OF THAT TIME IS SPENT “SEARCHING” FOR A SPOT. DO BUS DRIVERS SEARCH FOR PARKING SPACES IN THEIR BUSES? DO BIKE RIDERS? DO UPS DRIVERS? SIMPLY ABSURD.

“San Francisco is the ‘Innovation Capital of the World’ and the car sharing and EV Capital of America,” 

ABSURD. JUST BECAUSE YOU SAY SOMETHING OVER AND OVER, THAT DOESN’T MAKE IT TRUE.

“…enables users to pay for parking in advance…”

WHAT? I THINK THIS SERVICE IS FOR RICH, STUPID PEOPLE, THE GROUP THAT WAS TARGETED BY SFPARK.

So, why don’t you have an electric vehicle, Mayor Ed Lee?

Better yet, why not just ditch the car and ride a bike or take transit to get to your appointments?

Otherwise, you’re just all talk and no action.

And exactly how many rich stupids are out there to support a “premium car service” such as this? Maybe out-of-towners who don’t where to park would take “advantage” of this?

And gee, if you only want to go on a trip in a “premium” “sports” “motor car,” if that’s your deal-breaker, well, maybe you don’t really need to go on that trip.

Michael Cabanatuan explains it all for you here, if that’ll help.

At least I understand how Audi Avenue works over there in Union Square - Audi writes a seven-figure check and burnishes its image.

But BMW, what do you get out of this? Who’s going to download your stupid apps?

But I’ve digressed.

Have at it:

“BMW Group Announces Launch of ParkNow Mobile Parking Service and Details DriveNow Car-Sharing Service, Featuring 70 All-Electric BMW ActiveE Vehicles, in San Francisco

SAN FRANCISCO, Aug. 20, 2012 — At a press conference with San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee, BMW Group Member of the Board Dr. Ian Robertson today announced the upcoming launch of ParkNow, an innovative mobile parking solution that is a joint venture with Urban Mobility, and provided new details about DriveNow, a unique premium car-sharing service which features a fleet of BMW ActiveE all-electric vehicles.  San Francisco serves as the initial U.S. market for each service.

San Francisco is at the forefront of cities working to develop and implement innovative approaches to urban challenges, including traffic congestion and the need for smarter, greener parking systems. There are an estimated 505,000 vehicles in San Francisco, yet only 448,000 parking spaces available at any given time.  On weekdays, the total vehicle population increases by approximately 35,000.  An estimated one-third of all downtown traffic on weekdays is due to vehicles searching for a parking spot.

“The BMW Group is more than a premium car company, it is also focused on developing and delivering new services to help meet the increasing need for flexible mobility solutions in our cities,” said Dr. Robertson. “The premium car-sharing service DriveNow and parking solution ParkNow will help meet that demand in San Francisco and, ultimately, in other cities. Our introduction of these services in San Francisco represents BMW’s commitment to encouraging the development of new mobility options that will reduce emissions and congestion and improve the quality of life for San Franciscans.”

“San Francisco is the ‘Innovation Capital of the World’ and the car sharing and EV Capital of America,” said Mayor Lee.  ”I am pleased that BMW has chosen San Francisco as the first U.S. site for its innovative services and has launched their program entirely with electric vehicles.”

ParkNow, which will be available to drivers beginning in September, is an online mobile parking service that enables users to pay for parking in advance, with guaranteed access and clearly defined rates, based on their personal preferences. Customers can search for parking using ParkNow’s mobile app or website, reserve, pay and then be navigated directly to the parking facility, reducing time spent looking for parking, as well as emissions. There are currently 14 ParkNow locations in and around San Francisco piloting the system. Stations are located around the city, close to BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit), Muni (San Francisco Municipal Railway)and bike-sharing stations, as well as at San Francisco International Airport, Oakland International Airport and in Palo Alto. Four ParkNow partner operators, ProPark America, Towne Park, ABM Parking and California Parking, will launch over 100 additional ParkNow locations in the coming weeks.

DriveNow which launched in June in San Francisco is a flexible, premium car-sharing program offering the opportunity to drive BMW’s first all-electric vehicle, the BMW ActiveE with zero emission driving. The fleet of 70 ActiveE vehicles is located at eight DriveNow Stations around San Francisco, with two additional stations in Palo Alto and at the San Francisco International Airport coming soon.  After registering online or in-person, customers can locate and book an available car using the DriveNow web site or mobile app. They can then return the car to the same – or any other – DriveNow Station, allowing for convenient one-way trips, if desired. Stations are located around the city, close to BART, MUNI and bike-sharing stations. Through a partnership with California-based Coulomb Technologies’ ChargePoint network, the largest network of independently-owned electric vehicle charging stations, drivers can easily locate a nearby charging station if they need to top-off during the course of their rental, which has no time limit. Parking and charging is free at DriveNow Stations.

All of these initiatives are part of BMW i, a BMW brand focused on developing sustainable premium mobility solutions. Richard Steinberg is the CEO of DriveNow. Gary Neff is the CEO of ParkNow.

BMW is a Launch Partner of the non-profit Green Parking Council. GPC works at the intersection of parking, green building, clean technology, renewable energy, smart grid infrastructure, urban planning and sustainable mobility. By challenging the parking industry to collaborate and create open-sourced, sustainable best practices, GPC encourages exceptional industry transformation through partnerships, creativity and ingenuity.

BMW i Ventures is the automaker’s venture capital company, created to fund budding technology companies working to solve mobility challenges in the world’s most densely populated cities. It has made strategic investments in several companies, including Coulomb Technologies. Coulomb’s ChargePoint is the largest online global charging network, connecting electric vehicle drivers to charging stations in more than 14 countries. The investment by BMW supports the development of infrastructure for plug-in electric vehicles.

Other investments include ParkAtMyHouse, an innovative online marketplace designed to connect home and business owners interested in earning money by renting their space with drivers in need of a convenient, safe and cost-effective place to park. The service has 20,000 unique locations and over 150,000 registered drivers. An international rollout in cooperation with BMW i is currently live in the UK, Ireland, Canada and the U.S. The first i Ventures investment was in MyCityWay, a set of location-aware apps for urban navigation that provide users with information on public transportation, parking availability and local entertainment in San Francisco and 70 other cities across the U.S. and around the world.

The BMW i brand also notably encompasses two revolutionary new vehicles set to launch in 2013 and 2014 – the BMW i3 and BMW i8. The BMW i3 and BMW i8 will become the first two production vehicles to be purpose-built as electric and hybrid-electric using entirely new methods and materials such as lightweight, but ultra-strong carbon fiber reinforced plastic, which is being produced at a BMW factory powered by hydroelectricity in Moses Lake, Washington.

For more information, please visit http://www.bmw-i.com/mobilityservices and www.drive-now.com.

BMW Group in America

BMW of North America, LLC has been present in the United States since 1975. Rolls-Royce Motor Cars NA, LLC began distributing vehicles in 2003. The BMW Group in the United States has grown to include marketing, sales, and financial service organizations for the BMW brand of motor vehicles, including motorcycles, the MINI brand, and the Rolls-Royce brand of Motor Cars; DesignworksUSA, a strategic design consultancy in California; a technology office in Silicon Valley and various other operations throughout the country. BMW Manufacturing Co., LLC in South Carolina is part of BMW Group’s global manufacturing network and is the exclusive manufacturing plant for all X5 and X3 Sports Activity Vehicles and X6 Sports Activity Coupes. The BMW Group sales organization is represented in the U.S. through networks of 339 BMW passenger car and BMW Sports Activity Vehicle centers, 139 BMW motorcycle retailers, 114 MINI passenger car dealers, and 32 Rolls-Royce Motor Car dealers. BMW (US) Holding Corp., the BMW Group’s sales headquarters for North America, is located in Woodcliff Lake, New Jersey.

Information about BMW Group products is available to consumers via the Internet at:  www.bmwgroupna.com.

Finally, Giants Pitcher Matt Cain Gets the Giant Billboard He Deserves – Compare the Old with the New

Monday, July 9th, 2012

Now see here, this is the way things used to be at Geary and Masonic, right near the deadly Masonic Trader Joe’s gro sto.

See? This ad from last year was horrible: 

Click to expand

Then the local Audi people got rid of this billboard because the Giants were no longer champs.

But then, Matt Cain pitched his perfect game, so up goes this new ad:

It’s much better, non? 

Hurray!

This is Still a Stupid Billboard: “We Strike Out Competition Like San Francisco Champs” from Pitcher Matt Cain

Wednesday, June 13th, 2012

Still.

But anyway

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Audios.

This Video Shows How the SFPD Runs Its Broadway Tunnel Speed Trap – Beware Drivers of Audis, MINIs and Priuseseses

Monday, February 27th, 2012

In the space of about ten minutes one quiet morning, two or three SFPD motorcycle cops handed out citations to the drivers of three Audis, a MINI and a Toyota Prius hybrid in the area of the western terminus of the Broadway Tunnel.

Audis and MINIs generally go too fast, of course – I didn’t see exactly what the Prius driver did wrong.

Anyway, here’s one of the Audis, a TT, coming out of North Beach way too fast. My buddy Nelson thought this was real funny:

Audi drivers, you may have good reflexes ‘n stuff but you’re right down there with the Prius drivers.

Anyway, it’s unusual to see the SFPD care about speeding, IMO.

The Park Station SFPD Lying in Wait on the Speediest Part of JFK Jr Drive near 8th Avenue in Golden Gate Park

Friday, November 4th, 2011

I assume that this officer is parked here, betwixt the Conservatory of Flowers and 8th Avenue, for the benefit of speeders.

(BMW drivers, especially, have a hard time keeping to the limit here, it seems…)

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Sometimes the cops put an automated radar trailer what tells you your speed, but people tend to ignore it.

As this Audi (Chariot of the Yuppie) driver shows. (Note that he was slowing down to 36 MPH in this shot.)

Oh well.

Don’t Dare Park on the Mean Streets of San Francisco Without Your Rubber BumperBully

Wednesday, October 12th, 2011

The owner of this aging, POS, Audi cabriolet sleeps well at night knowing BumperBully Gold Edition is OTJ, I’m sure:

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O.K., if it makes you happy…

“The Bumper Bully is the best quality bumper protector in the market. There are lots of cheap imitation products that are PVC based, so there is no rubber in them. The GOLD EDITION is our standard bumper protector. Features Steel Reinforced Straps….NO IMPACT PADS!”