Posts Tagged ‘Better’

Here It Is: SFGov’s Latest PowerPoint on “BETTER” MARKET STREET

Friday, October 6th, 2017

Here’s your link with 33 pages. Enjoy.

eddfyhjhtde

(Funnier adjectives include “elegant” and “transformative.”)

An Afternoon SFPD “Sting” Operation to Enforce the Mandatory Right Turn on Market Inbound at 6th – Two Vignettes

Wednesday, March 1st, 2017

I’m sure you all know all about the No Left Turn and the rarer No Right Turn, but this here is about the No Straight at 6th Street on Market Street inbound.

Now of course this enforcement action wasn’t an actual sting operation as:

  1. It wasn’t bike riders getting ticketed, and
  2. There was no subterfuge.

Take a look – if you can’t see dude standing in the street with the sun at your back, well, you’ve got issues, Gentle Reader:

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Of course, the fishing’d be easier in the AM but this was in the afternoon. Here comes Victim #1, blithely motoring straight through, as people have done for more than a century:

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Cop springs into the slow lane…

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…and then informs the driver of the new-ish rule. But get this – popo let him off with just a warning. FIN.

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That’s story #1.

Story #2 is shorter. Through the intersection…

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…and then after a 30-second chat…

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…out comes the ticket book. That’s (at least) $238 for starters, but the real-life cost could get up to something like $1000-something what with the court fees and possible increase insurance costs and whatnot.

Anyway, FIN for Story #2.

I’m surprised the cops are still just warning people in 2017, JMO.

ENDOFLINE

Here’s One Way that San Francisco Tourists are Better than San Francisco Residents

Wednesday, November 19th, 2014

San Francisco tourists never ever spend time telling you how many years they’ve lived in San Francisco. And of course, they never say that they were “born and raised” in the 415 either.

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How refreshing!

Found Object: Crass Marketing from David Clay Jewelers – From the “Condescending and a Little Douchebaggy Campaign” of 2012

Wednesday, June 11th, 2014

“DOES YOUR DAUGHTER HAVE A BETTER DIAMOND THAN YOUR WIFE?”

At least that’s what I think this ad is asking:

Click to expand

Ah, memories.

Board of Supervisors President David Chiu vs. Chris Bucchere – Who’s the Better Cyclist? Checking with the StreetsBlog Crowd

Thursday, June 13th, 2013

Let’s see here, in one corner we have super nerd and Board President David Chiu, who almost always wears a fucking suit* when he drives his bicycle hither and yon.

He even goes Down Peninsula Way sometimes, to check out the reverse commute some San Franciscans do.

Now, you’d think that’d earn him huzzahs from the monomaniacal “livable streets” StreetsBlog crowd, but you’d be wrong.

You see, he ran afoul of that crew by being on the fence with the recent SFTAMUNIDPTSFBC effort to remove street parking from the bulk of Polk.

For that reason he now gets criticized for riding his bike in the wrong fashion, like how he pedals ‘n stuff.

Isn’t that absurd, to say that about this supernerd?

Yes. He does fine on Market Street, AFAICS.

See?

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OTOH, Strava-obsessed Chris Bucchere, who was involved with death of a pedestrian near an intersection of the very same Market Street, well he, apparently, is/was the victim of a “lynch mob” (look it up, you’ll find it) when he got/gets called an “asshole” (most typically from fellow self-identified cyclists) for his actions before during and after the death of pedestrian Sutchi Hui.

Oh well.

Isn’t there a lesson to be learned form the Chris Bucchere case? Shouldn’t the San Francisco Bicycle Coalition be willing to even mention his name? Yes, I know it doesn’t help fund-raising and membership and whatnot, but wouldn’t it be a good thing to debate?

Because really, what eventually happens with the Chris Bucchere case  doesn’t really matter. It’s the future Buccheri we need to worry about, right?

Anyway, David Chiu is a better cyclist than Chris Bucchere.

*Something to do with “respect for the voters,” or something

San Francisco’s Mid-Market Renaissance Continues: Now You Can Buy Flat-Panel LED TV’s at 7th and Market

Monday, September 17th, 2012

You know, in addition to all the iPhones:

Seen walking away from the open-air stolen iPhone market on the north side of this very intersection: 

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Next month, fences will have to start charging 10 cents for each booty bag. Cause it’ll be The Law. So that’ll be $20 for that TV plus 10 cents for the bag. And the remote? Well, you’ll have to look it up and buy one online…

Recession, What Recession? San Francisco’s Very Own SalesForce.Com Continues to Kick Ass, Take Names

Thursday, August 18th, 2011

See?

Salesforce.com Announces Fiscal Second Quarter Results

First Enterprise Cloud Computing Company to Exceed $2.1 Billion Annual Revenue Run Rate

— Record Quarterly Revenue of $546 Million, up 38% Year-Over-Year

— Raises FY12 Revenue Guidance to $2.22 Billion – $2.23 Billion

— Deferred Revenue of $935 Million, up 37% Year-Over-Year

— Operating Cash Flow of $83 Million, up 9% Year-Over-Year

— Company Record 6,300 Net New Customer Additions

— Total Customers Rise to 104,000, up 21,600 or 26% Year-Over-Year

SalesForce saved our bacon, you know, after our somewhat misguided BioTech Uber Alles approach to Mission Bay bit the dust.

Plus, CEO and Fouder Marc Benioff just kicked in nine(!) figures to build a new UCSF Childrens Hospital.

See? What it will look like:

See you at DreamForce 2011!

And at that big concert too, the one with Alanis and will.i.am and Jay Leno and MC Hammer and

All the deets:

SAN FRANCISCO, Aug. 18, 2011 – Salesforce.com (NYSE: CRM), the enterprise cloud computing (http://www.salesforce.com/cloudcomputing/) company, today announced results for its fiscal second quarter ended July 31, 2011.

“We’re expecting over 40,000 people to register for Dreamforce which takes place in San Francisco later this month. It’s the cloud event of the year where attendees can learn how to supercharge their relationships with employees and customers using social, mobile and open cloud technologies,” said Marc Benioff, Chairman and CEO, salesforce.com. “We hope to see you there.”

Salesforce.com delivered the following results for its fiscal second quarter:

Revenue: Total Q2 revenue was $546 million, an increase of 38% on a year-over-year basis. Subscription and support revenues were $509 million, an increase of 38% on a year-over-year basis. Professional services and other revenues were $37 million, an increase of 44% on a year-over-year basis.

Earnings per Share: Q2 GAAP net loss per share was ($0.03), and non-GAAP diluted earnings per share increased 3% year-over-year to $0.30. These GAAP and non-GAAP results include a one-time charge of $0.04 per diluted share associated with the legal settlement disclosed in the Form 8-K filed on June 15, 2011. The company’s non-GAAP results exclude the effects of approximately $55 million in stock-based compensation expense, approximately $19 million in amortization of purchased intangibles, and approximately $3 million in net non-cash interest expense related to the company’s convertible senior notes. Non-GAAP EPS calculations are based on 143 million diluted shares outstanding during the quarter, including approximately 4 million shares associated with the convertible senior notes and warrants. GAAP EPS calculations are based on a basic share count of approximately 135 million shares.

Customers: Net paying customers rose approximately 6,300 during the quarter to finish at approximately 104,000. This was a quarterly record for the company. Since July 31, 2010, the company added 21,600 net paying customers, an increase of 26% on a year-over-year basis. As discussed on May 19, 2011, the company will no longer provide the customer metric on a quarterly basis, but expects to provide periodic updates on achievement of customer milestones in the future.

Cash: Cash generated from operations for the fiscal second quarter was $83 million, an increase of 9% on a year-over-year basis. Total cash, cash equivalents and marketable securities finished the quarter at approximately $1.3 billion.

Deferred Revenue: Deferred revenue on the balance sheet as of July 31, 2011 was $935 million, an increase of 37% on a year-over-year basis.

As of August 18, 2011, salesforce.com is initiating guidance for its third quarter of fiscal year 2012. In addition, the company is raising its prior full fiscal year 2012 revenue guidance and updating its projected full fiscal year 2012 GAAP and non-GAAP EPS guidance previously provided on May 19, 2011.

On it goes

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Audi Avenue: Powell Street Promenade is a Big Fat Joke – A Series of Eight Parklets to Market Audi’s Cars

Tuesday, July 12th, 2011

[During all of this Powell Street Promenade stuff, please remember:

“…the benches draw their inspiration from the aluminum chassis of the all-new A7, the Audi ASF® frame.”

There will be a test later.]

[Chronicle Urban Design Critic John King just weighed in. Uh, John, the original plan was supposed to relieve “pedestrian congestion,” as this recent design concept from Audi shows, but the current design won’t do that. And “parklet” is a pejorative in this case. And those “abstract oars” you see are “inspired by” a 2012 Audi. Thusly:

The hockey stick behind the rear wheel – see it? That’s where your oars came from.]

Get up to speed on the new Audi Avenue / Powell Street Promenade Project right here.

Let me tell you, the Powell Street Promenade in Union Square will look nothing like this:

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Instead, it will look like this, with aluminum grating and paddles and twisted things. See?

Are these tables? I think they’re tables:

We were promised no advertising, but you make the call:

“…like much of the promenade, the benches draw their inspiration from the aluminum chassis of the all-new A7, the Audi ASF® frame. While the twisting and sculpting of the metal is intended to reflect the dynamic styling of the luxury sedan…”

Is this why Audi owners make such bad drivers, generally, the boldness? (I’d call it hubris, frankly.) Anyway, let’s let Audi make the case:

“We believe that a boldly designed car, like the new Audi A7, deserves a boldly designed world. So today we’re breaking ground on an urban design initiative to re-imagine Powell Street in San Francisco.”

I’ll tell you, the last thing Audi drivers need is anything to do with boldness.

Oh, and Foursquare too: Audi Powell Street Promenade

This is the primary surface. Number one will pass right through, number two not so much:

Now, the original idea was to have a widened sidewalk but that would have caused issues with area hotels (like them suing the City and County for starters). So we’re going to get cutouts on both sides of both blocks. Thusly:

Here’s parklet eight of eight, near the Cable Car turnaround:

Now let’s thank Gaia that the aluminum hasn’t been arranged in interlocking rings to further advertise Audi and its million-dollar Audi Avenue. But there will be Audi’s name onsite and that’s too much, IMO. Oh well.

And I can’t think of any other carmaker that’s as closely associated with aluminum as Audi, so there’s that.

Was this marketing deal put out to bid, like maybe some other car companies might want to market their vehicles using the streets of San Francisco as well, right? Anyway, I don’t know.

Feel free to share your thoughts with SFGov – oh, whoops, comments be closed, just like the way they have it at BeyondChron, which is also financed with your taxpayer dollars.

All right, which particular Audi did the Powell Street Promenade draw its inspiration from? All together now, the A7! Get one today – starting price is merely $60K.

Hurray!

Lively SocketSite has some deets along with reaction from the commonweal.

SF Streetsblog

Progress on Powell 

[Earworm of the day: We’re going rock down to-oo/ Audi Avenue.]

[UPDATE: And a commenter from FineInternets.com frets over the metal theft issue. I wonder how much this aluminum would be worth melted down. See comments.]

Introducing Audi Avenue! (Nee Powell Street) Or, Should We Call It Powell Street, by Audi USA?

Tuesday, June 14th, 2011

Will Reisman has the deets about how Audi USA is spending seven figures to buy Powell Street, or something.

So now, Audi, adding to its reputation of selling its wares to the most extreme jackass drivers on the planet*, will also be known for having its own street in the 415.

Wouldn’t it be cool if they took down all the Powell street signs and replaced them with just the four rings of Audi’s logo? There’d be no text at all but everybody, tourists and citizens alike, would know exactly how to say the name of the street. Hurray!

It’ll look a little like this unfinished model – seems as if they forgot to add in the bodies of dead German tourists shot down on the street, but anyway:

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Now of course “Audi of America”** is claiming credit for the entire idea, but actually, we had this thing going 1.5 years ago.

Check it:

It wasn’t a success.

Anyway, here’s Audi’s spiel. Apparently, this whole thing was their thang all along, even before they knew about it, somehow:

“The Audi Design Project: Progress on Powell Street was launched with the purpose of improving the pedestrian experience on Powell Street in a way that transforms it into a vibrant destination and alleviates the congestion. So, working with the city of San Francisco, we’re doing something that might normally be considered unfathomable for an automaker — removing cars from the road. That’s right, we’re eliminating the parking lanes on both sides of the street and, in their place, creating a new public space that sits on top of the pavement.”

Read along after the jump to see how extra wide sidewalks on two blocks of Union Square Are Going To Change Everything.

*Yes, even worse than BMW drivers. The problem is that Audi drivers think that they’re extra special, that’s the problem…

**Is that your new name, Audi? Guess you have bad memories of the old one, Audi USA? Remember that whole unintended acceleration (sudden acceleration) thing back in the 1980’s and 1990’s? On behalf of America’s idiot drivers, I’d like to apologize for that whole deal. You were right, we were putting our feet on the wrong pedals. Our bad :(

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Who’s the Better Bay Area Billionaire: Is It Marc Benioff of SalesForce.com or Larry Ellison of Oracle?

Thursday, March 17th, 2011

Well let’s see here, now of course, Marc Benioff of Salesforce.com is spending 8 figures to pay for the UCSF Children’s Hospital they’re building at Mission Bay right now.

See?

OTOH, Larry Ellison of Oracle wants us to pay him and give him land so that San Francisco can be forced to watch his little boat race:

Oh, wait, that’s not Larry Ellison, here he is, flipping off the competition as he sails by on his little boat.


“I win! I win! I’m King Larry.”

Hurray Larry! We all love you, Larry! All your ex-wives let you down, but it wasn’t your fault, Larry, it was all their fault, you’re the greatest, Larry!

Mmmm.

When Eric Cartman saved South Park he wanted just one reward – he wanted to play with his toy truck, but, also, he wanted another child to be forced to watch. See?


In this image, the toy truck is the America’s Cup, Cartman is Ellison, and Kyle back there, he’s the people of San Francisco, sold down the river, once again.

So, if you’re getting pressured to “donate” to Larry’s little boat race to “help the town” or whatever, that’s fine, do it if you want. You’ll be sure to get access to the “V.I.P.” tent or whatever and you’ll get some swag like a souvenir windbreaker or something, that’s fine.

Or, instead, you can do something real and donate to UCSF Mission Bay. (Last I heard, they needed something north of half a bil., all told)

It’s your choice.

Anyway, the results are in: Marc Benioff is the Better Bay Area Billionaire.