Posts Tagged ‘bmw’

As Seen In The Richmond: A BMW’s Last Ride

Monday, October 17th, 2016

I guess it’s a parts car now:


More car glass gets broken in Frisco than prolly anywhere else in the world…

The UPSHIFT Car Rental Delivery Service is On The Road in Frisco

Thursday, October 13th, 2016

I hadn’t thought of this new biz for a couple years, but now here it is, spotted in the wilds of the Financh:


I guess Bro here just drove a rental Prius to somebody’s home, took out his Bianchi and is now heading home? I think that’s how things work.

Just What Frisco Needs: More BMW Owners from Back East

Tuesday, October 11th, 2016

I guess moving to the 415 is still a thing, so you fly on over from New Yawk or Joisey and then have your Beemer loaded up in a car carrier for delivery direct to your new stoop in the Western Addition:


Welcome, Auslanders.

FLASHBACK: “My Other Car Is A Hodor” – This Meme was the Harambe of 2014 – DMV Plate “[HAND] OF KNG”

Monday, October 3rd, 2016

Look at the registration – this car is still on the road:


And now harambe too is losing its luster as a meme.

Wonder what our next great meme will be…

All Cars in Frisco are All-Electric, Based Upon This Scene

Thursday, September 1st, 2016

Nissan Leaf, Tesla Model S, and BMW i3 times two on Green Street:

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“I’ll Take BOXY THINGS WE DON’T NEED ANYMORE for $400, Alex!” – A Scene from The Richmond

Monday, August 22nd, 2016

Do we need cars anymore? IDK, but we have more registered in the history of Frisco right now, just saying. Anyway, this boxy 1973 BMW 2002 is totally max:

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But the cathode ray tube (CRT) TV abandoned on the Avenues? Nobody wants that, obvs.

And the USPS letter box? It doesn’t get so much use anymore, but just try taking it away – you’ll hear howls of protest with a quickness I’m sure. (Or people’d email their complaints, more likely, these days.)

Which box do you prefer?

The Most Ridiculous Tall, Skinny Wheels BMW Will Sell You – Fashion Over Function to an Extreme Degree

Friday, June 24th, 2016

The fashion is to have bigger and bigger wheels on cars ’cause that’s how we roll these days. Fine. But this?

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Oh, it has good handling? No it doesn’t.

How about some Prius-style wheels what are are a half-foot smaller in diameter? Oh no, not for you? OK, enjoy your Conestoga wheels┬áthen…

Word on the Street, From Aging Millionaires in an Aging BMW Convertible: “BILLIONAIRES CAN’T BUY BERNIE” – Poor Hillary!

Monday, March 28th, 2016

Just assuming on the millionaire part, but this very clean 80’s-style orthogonal Beemer has been garaged for decades, obvs, so that and the white hair suggests long-term bay area house ownership, and all that suggests millionaires to me…

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Relationship Advice from JP’s Whip, a Large BMW: “ADD SPICE TO YOUR LIFE – MARRY A KOREAN”

Wednesday, September 23rd, 2015

No Tindr necessary for JP, nosiree, not with a 7-series as his hype man:

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(the italians of asia)

A Tad Serious for the Panhandle Bike Path, Non? Is This a Sport or Just a Way to Get Around? – Both?

Tuesday, September 22nd, 2015

IDK, how fast do you need to pedal on this downhill stretch of the Panhandle Multi-Use Trail what with the stiff prevailing tailwind and the super-light bike and the super-skinny tires?

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I’ll tell you, you don’t need to pedal at all, from Stanyan to the fucking DMV (and Beyond, if the traffic signals work in your favor) – just really pump up your tires and try it sometime.

I’ll tell you, you know who else mixes up sport with transpo? The good bulk* of your BMW drivers, who cause more than their fair share of problems on our roads, despite having better-than-average reflexes and whatnot.

A good portion of your BMW car drivers need to slow the fuck down, and certain other people, perhaps you, see above, might need to as well.

That’s my point.

Just saying.

*Some purchase Beemers as Just Another Luxury Brand these days, of course. These people are excused…