Posts Tagged ‘c w nevius’

Here’s Why San Francisco Chronicle Writer CW Nevius is the Bay Area’s Worst Journalist: Central Subway 2008 vs. 2013

Wednesday, April 24th, 2013

This is from back in 2008, when the Central Subway project was projected to carry 100,000 riders per day and spin off cash for the SFMTA to use to fund the rest of MUNI:

“Nevius: Chinatown subway plan makes me wince”

“There’s really only one question to ask about the proposal to bore a light-rail subway deep under the heart of downtown San Francisco. You’re kidding, right?

“Just the initial math makes your head hurt. Basically it works out to somewhere between $1.22 billion and $1.4 billion for an underground railway that runs for less than two miles and has only three stops. That’s not a transit system, it’s a model railroad.

“Throw in a few of the inevitable cost overruns and this could work out to a billion dollars a mile.”

“No matter. This is the kind of big, splashy project that city officials love to put their name on.”

“Basically, the argument seems to boil down to this - we’ve got the money (as if federal tax dollars grow on trees), the Chinatown community is behind it, why not build it? Oh, let me count some of the reasons.”

“But, critics say, a stop on Market beneath which BART and other Muni lines already run might have made this whole thing an easier sell. That would have created an opportunity for a single station where riders could make connections between regional and local trains, almost like Grand Central Terminal in New York. Instead,riders will have to walk all the way up to Union Square.”

“Oh, and did I mention that in order to get under the BART tube, the subway station at Union Square will have to be at least 95 feet below the surface. That’s nine stories.”

“What is it about that image of deep, underground dirt-munching machines in earthquake country that makes me wince?”

And this is from 2013, after the projected ridership has plunged to about 30,00 per day and its obvious that this subway is going to be a massive annual drain on MUNI’s operating budget:

The hole in subway opponents’ arguments

I believe the vast majority of the city would love to have a north-south subway that extended from SoMa to Fisherman’s Wharf.

There has never been a city that has regretted building a subway. It’s a great system of transit, it gets people off the street and underground, and it doesn’t experience delays like buses.

What they don’t like is constructing a subway. It’s messy, dirty and noisy. But the result is worth it. Suck it up.”

Oh well…

SURPRISE: San Francisco Chronicle Writer CW Nevius Comes Out AGAINST the Central Subway – Here’s What He Said

Tuesday, April 16th, 2013

All right, first of all, if you want CW Nevius to Block you from his Twitter feed, start up a crappy WordPress blog and call him one of the following:

“SHARP-AS-A-MARBLE, EX-JOCK, EVERYMAN NEWS COLUMNIST/QUASI SPORTSWRITER” or a

“BROWN-NOSING, OBSEQUIOUS KISS-ASS LICKSPITTLE TOADIE”

That’s what did it, one or the other, I figure.

So now I’m banned, for life, from the Twitterings of the The Neve.

Oh well.

Anyway, here’s what the Nevinator has to say today about the Central Subway boondoggle.

See? It doesn’t seem that the Nevemeister opposes the wasteful Subway to Nowhere.

But he does! Check it:

“Nevius: Chinatown subway plan makes me wince”

“There’s really only one question to ask about the proposal to bore a light-rail subway deep under the heart of downtown San Francisco. You’re kidding, right?

“Just the initial math makes your head hurt. Basically it works out to somewhere between $1.22 billion and $1.4 billion for an underground railway that runs for less than two miles and has only three stops. That’s not a transit system, it’s a model railroad.

“Throw in a few of the inevitable cost overruns and this could work out to a billion dollars a mile.”

“No matter. This is the kind of big, splashy project that city officials love to put their name on.”

“Basically, the argument seems to boil down to this - we’ve got the money (as if federal tax dollars grow on trees), the Chinatown community is behind it, why not build it? Oh, let me count some of the reasons.”

“But, critics say, a stop on Market beneath which BART and other Muni lines already run might have made this whole thing an easier sell. That would have created an opportunity for a single station where riders could make connections between regional and local trains, almost like Grand Central Terminal in New York. Instead, riders will have to walk all the way up to Union Square.”

“Oh, and did I mention that in order to get under the BART tube, the subway station at Union Square will have to be at least 95 feet below the surface. That’s nine stories.”

“What is it about that image of deep, underground dirt-munching machines in earthquake country that makes me wince?”

Of course that was from a half-decade back, but it shows how he actually felt about this boondoggly boondoggle, about Big Dig West.

I mean, the Central Subway proposal hasn’t gotten better the past five years, has it? Five years ago, the promise was that it would “make money” for MUNI, that it would subsidize other parts of the system by generating a surplus. But now we know that it will burden the SFMTA and the current projections for the number of riders per day is down dramatically from what people were promising back then.

So what’s a matter Neve? Why don’t you write things like this anymore? Cat got your tongue?

Pak got your tongue?

The Old Nevius wasn’t afraid to be labeled a racist who’s against “transit justice.”

The Old Nevius wasn’t so monomaniacally dedicated to write source greasers every chance he got. 

Oh well.

Speaking of Offensive MUNI Bus Ads, Check Out This Campaign from San Francisco’s DAVID CLAY JEWELERS

Thursday, March 21st, 2013

Add this one to the list of crimes from DAVID KAY JEWELERS:

“You won’t get jealous when your friend gets the newer smaller version”

Click to expand

(Oh, and BTW, the offensive ad here isn’t “anti-gay” not at all.

To say so is ignorant.

But it is anti other things, I’ll grant you that.)

In closing, diamonds are horrible. Get anything else but a diamond. People will figure this out soon enough and the worthless piece of rock on your finger will be even more worthless a couple decades from now.

And more importantly, it will be seen by others as worthless.

Oh well.

CW Nevius Spanking Machine: “America’s Cup will be good for SF” – ORLY?

Monday, March 18th, 2013

Of course, the solution to all of the problems associated with Larry Ellison’s boat race is to have Larry Ellison pay for Larry Ellison’s boat race, don’t you think? I’d say about $40,000,000 would cover it, and thousands of people agree – just check out one of the petitions.

But CW Nevius is cheerleading for Larry full-tilt NO MATTER WHAT – let’s have a look:

“The financial landscape has changed. As reported this week, fundraising efforts have fallen well short of a projected $32 million.”

OH LORD. SO, WHEN DID OUR GREAT RECESSION BEGIN, SHALL WE SAY 2008 OR SO? ALL RIGHT, SO WHEN DID SFGOV / AMERICA’S CUP LACKEY KYRI McCLELLAN LAST COMMIT TO RAISING $40 MILLION FOR SAN FRANCISCO? LATE 2011, RIGHT? (SEE BELOW*) SO HOW DOES THAT WORK? ISN’T THE “FINANCIAL LANDSCAPE” ACTUALLY BETTER NOW IN 2013? I THINK SO. MAYBE PEOPLE WERE LYING? I THINK SO. OR MAYBE NEVIUS IS SAYING THAT THE FINANCIAL LANDSCAPE OF THE CUP ITSELF HAS CHANGED? BUT, CW, THERE WAS NO MONEY TO BEGIN WITH, THERE WAS NO $10 BILLION IN “FINANCIAL IMPACT,” THERE WAS NO “FLEET OF SUPER YACHTS” THAT WAS GOING TO COME IN AND RAIN DOWN MONEY ON US. IT WAS ALL MADE UP.

“…this will still basically be a break-even prospect for the city and a boost for the Bay Area’s economy.”

WELL THAT’S WHAT _YOU_ THINK, THAT’S WHAT YOU SAY. SOME WILL BENEFIT, SOME WILL LOSE. BUT IS IT REALLY SUCH A NOVEL IDEA TO HAVE LARRY ELLISON PAY FOR LARRY ELLISON’S BOAT RACE? DID WE EVEN ASK HIM?

“The anticipated windfall may not materialize, but the money won’t be taken from the general fund.”

WELL THAT’S WHAT _YOU_ THINK, NEVIUS.

“Instead of the mandated $64 an hour (yikes!), some contractors were paying as little as $27 an hour.”

COUNT THESE PEOPLE, THOSE UNSKILLED LABORERS MAKING 700% MORE THAN MARKET WAGES, AMONG THE WINNERS.

“However, Barkley had a good comeback. The Event Authority has arranged to reimburse the workers who were underpaid.”

UH NO, THAT’S _NOT_ A GOOD COMEBACK. WHY WOULD THEY AGREE TO PAY PREVAILING WAGE AND THEN NOT PAY PREVAILING WAGE? MAYBE THEY DON’T KNOW WHAT THEY’RE DOING?

“As deadlines approach, you can expect more sniping at the event – some reasonable, some pure political posturing, and some that is simply absurd.”

UH, SNIPING AT THE POOR DEAL THE CITY HAS STRUCK? SNIPING AT ALL THE CORRUPTION AND LIES THAT WE’RE DISCOVERING? ARE YOU ALLOWING THAT THAT’S REASONABLE THING TO DO, NEVIUS? ACTUALLY, I THINK YOU’D PREFER A WELL-NEGOTIATED AMERICA’S CUP DEAL OVER WHAT WE HAVE BUT YOU’RE  PRETTY MUCH INDIFFERENT. IT’S NOT YOUR MONEY THAT’S BEING WASTED AND YOU, THE SHARP-AS-A-MARBLE, EX-JOCK, EVERYMAN NEWS COLUMNIST/QUASI SPORTSWRITER, PROBABLY LOOK FORWARD TO ANY SPORTING-TYPE EVENT COMING TO TOWN, NO MATTER WHAT THE COST, NO MATTER HOW MUCH CORRUPTION.

“Those who complain that the Cup is taking place in a wealthy neighborhood that doesn’t need the benefit are an example of the latter. It’s a sailboat race. It pretty much has to be near the water.”

OH YOU SO FUNNY, NEVIUS! ACTUALLY, I THINK AVALOS WAS LOOKING FOR THE AC34 PEOPLE TO THROW A BONE TO THE OUTER DISTRICTS. SO THAT’S NOT SO “ABSURD,” IN FACT.

“It all boils down to a single question: Would you rather have this event here or not?”

OOH, THAT’S EASY! LET’S NOT HAVE THIS POORLY-NEGOTIATED EVENT HERE UNLESS LARRY ELLISON WANTS TO PAY FOR IT.

“In fact, Farrell put it very nicely at the end of the hearing.”The bottom line is this is going to be a great event at zero cost to the city,” he said.”

THAT WHAT HE SAYS. WE’LL SEE HOW IT GOES. THE FACT IS THAT DEAL WAS POORLY NEGOTIATED BY OUR SHORT-SIGHTED POLITICIANS. AND WHAT IF IT TURNS OUT TO BE NOT A GREAT EVENT. WHAT THEN?

“We’re talking about (an estimated) $900 million in economic activity and (a potential) 6,500 jobs. A lot of cities would pay a lot for that.”

UH, THE ORIGINAL ESTIMATE WAS 9.9 BILLION. THEN 1.4, THEN .7-SOMETHING AND NOW, APPARENTLY, $.9 BILLION IN “ECONOMIC IMPACT,” WHATEVER THE HELL THAT MEANS. ALL THESE ESTIMATES ARE NOTHING BUT HOCUS-POCUS FROM PEOPLE WHO REALLY, REALLY WANT AC34 TO BE PUT ON IN SF, NO MATTER WHAT THE COST. AND OH, HERE’S A QUERY: WOULD MARK FARRELL BE SUPERVISOR WITHOUT THE ASSISTANCE OF THOMAS COATES? OH NO, LORD NO.  WITHOUT TOM COATES, FARRELL WOULD BE JUST ANOTHER ANONYMOUS WHITE MILLIONAIRE DUDE WHO GREW UP A RICH KID IN THE MARINA. HERE’S THE THING: COATES LIKES BOATS. OH, AND WHAT YOU MEAN IS GIGS, NOT “JOBS,” MR. FARRELL. AND IF A LOT OF CITIES WOULD PAY FOR AC34, WHY NOT LET THEM?

“Then he went for the big finish. ”World-class cities put on world-class events,” he said. “And I think our city is going to shine.”

WORLD-CLASS CORRUPTION, FROM WORLD-CLASS LIARS, YEP.

“Sing it, Mr. Supervisor.”

YOU’RE SUCH A FUCKING BROWN-NOSING, OBSEQUIOUS KISS-ASS LICKSPITTLE TOADIE, YOU KNOW THAT, CW NEVIUS? (OH, AND YOU DIDN’T HAVE FARRELL’S PHONE NUMBER UNTIL TWO WEEKS _AFTER_ HE GOT ELECTED? YEP. HEH. YOU BELIEVED IN HIM _THAT_ MUCH, HUH?)

IN MITIGATION, I DIDN’T SEE THE PHRASE ‘NATURAL AMPHITHEATRE” ANYWHERE IN YOUR ESSAY, NEVIUS, SO THANKS FOR THAT.

IN AGGRAVATION, THE ABHORRENT PHRASE “WORLD-CLASS” APPEARED TWICE. (AND “WIN-WIN,” WELL, YOU DIDN’T SAY IT, BUT YOU WERE THINKING IT SO WE’LL CALL THAT A WASH.)

DIAL-A-CLICHE SCORECARD:

*Here it is, America’s Cup Project Update from September 2011. Now I’ll tell you, the “commitment” that Organizing Committee “CEO” Kyle McClellan (she actually was on both sides of this deal – it’s kind of a scandal) is talking about is “endeavoring” to raise $32 million or $40 million or whatever.  What she actually says is a bit different though. It seems as if she thinks (or thought, back in 2011) that her commitment was to actually raise the promised money as opposed to just trying to raise the promised money.

I think we are on track to meet the commitments of the host city agreement at the end of this year. We are out in the marketplace raising those funds and we have a great operational model with the event authority on — we provide corporate sponsor introductions and they help facilitate our outreach to philanthropists whether individuals or families and are providing us with the assets that are necessary.

“So when you ask someone for a seven figure gift, we can articulate the benefits that are coming to the city for that, helping us pay for environmental review and pay for the transit and doing it the San Francisco Way. The folks who made early commitments to us before we had our tax exempt status are really proud of the way it is unfolding. as more definition comes to the plan and people have a better understanding of the community benefits, what are the youth opportunities, what are the workforce and job plans and that is unfolding the next three months so we are going out to sell those opportunities for folks to help us facilitate our obligations.

“Generally I say I’m raising $40 million if you count the $32 million specified in the host city agreement. There is a bond provision and other obligations, whether taxes or utilities, garbage. Then I have the operational expenses. So if you roll it all up, a little bit of contingency, I think we are generally comfortable saying we are raising $40 million.”

Uploaded on Sep 21, 2011

This Press Conference held at San Francisco City Hall unveils schedules for America’s Cup racing around the world for the next three years, culminating in the ultimate America’s Cup held in San Francisco in 2013.”

Why is George Gascon the Point Man for Islamophobia, His Afghanistan Yemen Problem? Plus a New LGBT Ad

Monday, March 18th, 2013

Ah, let’s see here, is District Attorney George Gascon going to be on the Today Show like today?

SF District Attorney George Gascon will be on the Today show Monday am re: Islamophobic Ads on MUNI. Stay tuned!… http://fb.me/10hSSRRFR  ”

Could be (but I’ll never know ’cause I only have a rabbit ear antenna and, oddly, there’s no NBC affiliate in my tiny town, nor in the county, nor in any of the neighboring counties and I’ll be damned if the Comcast monopoly is going to get $100 per month out of me for basic cable.)

Anyway, leave us review, let’s travel all the way back to ought-ten:

SF Police Chief George Gascon’s HATE CRIME act against Yemenis

OPINION: SFPD Chief’s apology did not address culturally insensitive mentality

So now in 2013, George Gascon sees a chance to make amends with all sorts of different groups by being the point man on SFGov’s anti-MUNI bus ad campaign?

Sure looks that way. See the press release below.

Hey, is George Gascon running for Mayor of San Francisco, you know, down the road?

Maybe. (All he needs to do is clear up his case of foot-in-mouth disease by 2017 or whatever.)

Fin.

New topic.

Are new ads coming to MUNI buses?

Check it:

Is this ad Islamophobic and is the City Family going hold another news conference? I don’t know. You tell me.

What I do know is that maybe the MyJihad campaign isn’t going so hot.

Oh, and the next big terrorism incident we’re going to run into will be due to a white American dude, most likely, just saying, GC. I’m srsly.

On It Goes…

District Attorney, Board President Chiu, and City Leaders Denounce Islamophobic MUNI Ads
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
March 11, 2013

Contact: Stephanie Ong Stillman, DA Gascón’s Office
ADA Alex Bastian, DA Gascón’s Office

SAN FRANCISO – Today, District Attorney George Gascón, Board of Supervisors President David Chiu, and Supervisors John Avalos, London Breed, Malia Cohen, Jane Kim, Scott Wiener, Norman Yee held a press conference to denounce Islamophobic and racist advertisements by the American Freedom Defense Initiative (AFDI) scheduled to run on MUNI buses today.

“These offensive ads serve no other purpose than to denigrate our city’s Arab and Muslim communities,” said District Attorney George Gascón. “When any community in San Francisco is attacked, it affects all of us. I and the city leaders standing with me today are exercising our free speech rights in condemning these ads and standing with the Arab and Muslim communities of San Francisco.”

“Hate has no place in our City,” said Mayor Ed Lee. “San Francisco is a city that celebrates its diversity, and hateful speech and discrimination against our Arab and Muslim communities will never be tolerated.”

“Our respect for free speech does not mean we allow hateful speech to go unchallenged,” said Board President David Chiu. “As a former civil rights attorney, I’m proud to stand with our Arab and Muslim American families to send a united message that San Francisco embraces diversity and tolerance, not hate and bigotry.”

AFDI’s founder Pamela Geller has been deemed an anti-Muslim hate extremist by the Southern Poverty Law Center. In August of 2012, San Franciscans were outraged over AFDI advertisements on MUNI that referred to Arabs and Muslims as “savages.” Arab and Muslim community leaders say the new advertisements are even more offensive as they wrongly suggest that all Muslims are defined by extremism and violence, and baselessly target Arab and Muslim San Franciscans who make invaluable contributions to the city’s life and culture.

Supervisor David Chiu is introducing a resolution to condemn the Islamophobic and racist MUNI Ads at Tuesday’s Board of Supervisors meeting. In response, the San Francisco Municipal Transportation Authority will dedicate the proceeds from the offensive advertisements to fund a city-wide study on the impact of discrimination on Arab and Muslim communities. City leaders have met with Council on American-Islamic Relations – San Francisco Bay Area, Asian Law Caucus, the Ramallah Club, the Arab Cultural Center, churches and mosques to discuss targeting of vulnerable communities and the city’s commitment to protecting and standing with those communities.”

Himitsu no Izakaya! Tekka Sushi is Still Chugging Along Way Out There at 6th and Balboa – The Sushi Nazi

Friday, March 1st, 2013

This is it, the whole thing.

As seen from Balboa betwixt 6th and 7th:

Click to expand

Of course The Nevius Incident is still fresh in people’s minds, but the healing has begun.

Bonus: The super-long lines are gone.

NB: You see, CW Nevius? There IS a sign out front. It says Tekka.

どうもありがとうミスターロボット (dōmo arigatō misutā Robotto)

秘密を知りたい (himitsu wo shiritai)

SF Chronicle Building Attacked with Graffiti: “Fuck CW Nevius, Fuck Gentrification”

Monday, February 25th, 2013

Appears as if this recent pro-gentrification bit from CW Nevius has garnered a reaction from the street.

Check it:

Via Jason L Loren of The Tech Chronicles - click to expand

I’d say the top suspects in this caper are the tens of thousands of people who have priced apartment rents in the 415 over the past few months.

Of course CW Nevius himself is a newcomer to San Francisco, but he likes increasing rents because he’s an owner, right?

Oh well.

Holy Toledo! Official San Francisco Contractor AutoReturn Advertises Bible Verses While Towing Cars in the 415?

Friday, November 9th, 2012

WTF is this? Is this a tow truck towing cars in the Financial under authority of the contract AutoReturn has with SFGov?

I think so!

And yet, in addition to charging you $500 for towing away your ride for being just 13 minutes late, AutoReturn wants to be involved with giving you a lecture from the King James.

Check it: 

Click to expand

I cry foul.

For the record, PSALM 23:

The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want.
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures:
He leadeth me beside the still waters.
He restoreth my soul:
He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for His name’ sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil: For thou art with me;
Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies;
Thou annointest my head with oil; My cup runneth over.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the House of the Lord forever.

And then I’ll tow your car.

Sometimes, I just don’t know…

“The colonel’s hostility softened gradually as he applied himself to details. “Now, I want you to give a lot of thought to the kind of prayers we’re going to say. I don’t want anything heavy or sad. I’d like you to keep it light and snappy, something that will send the boys out feeling pretty good. Do you know what I mean? I don’t want any of this Kingdom of God or Valley of Death stuff. That’s all too negative. What are you making such a sour face for?”

“I’m sorry, sir,” the chaplain stammered. “I happened to be thinking of the Twenty-third Psalm just as you said that.”

“How does that one go?”

“That’s the one you were just referring to, sir. ‘The Lord is my shepherd; I—’”

“That’s the one I was just referring to. It’s out. What else have you got?”

“‘Save me, O God; for the waters are come in unto—’”

“No waters,” the colonel decided, blowing ruggedly into his cigarette holder after flipping the butt down into his combed-brass ash tray. “Why don’t we try something musical? How about the harps on the willows?”

“That has the rivers of Babylon in it, sir,” the chaplain replied. “‘…there we sat down, yea, we wept, when we remembered Zion.’”

“Zion? Let’s forget about that one right now. I’d like to know how that one ever got in there. Haven’t you got anything humorous that stays away from waters and valleys and God? I’d like to keep away from the subject of religion altogether if we can.”

The chaplain was apologetic. “I’m sorry, sir, but just about all the prayers I know are rather somber in tone and make at least some passing reference to God.”

“Then let’s get some new ones. The men are already doing enough bitching about the missions I send them on without our rubbing it in with any sermons about God or death or Paradise. Why can’t we take a more positive approach? Why can’t we all pray for something good, like a tighter bomb pattern, for example? Couldn’t we pray for a tighter bomb pattern?”

“Well, yes, sir, I suppose so,” the chaplain answered hesitantly. “You wouldn’t even need me if that’s all you wanted to do. You could do that yourself.”

“I know I could,” the colonel responded tartly. “But what do you think you’re here for? I could shop for my own food, too, but that’s Milo’s job, and that’s why he’s doing it for every group in the area. Your job is to lead us in prayer, and from now on you’re going to lead us in a prayer for a tighter bomb pattern before every mission. Is that clear? I think a tighter bomb pattern is something really worth praying for. It will be a feather in all our caps with General Peckem. General Peckem feels it makes a much nicer aerial photograph when the bombs explode close together.”

Photo: The Harmless 2012 Coyote Pups of Golden Gate Park Defy Expectations of CW Nevius, Scoflaw Dog Owners

Wednesday, October 17th, 2012

Are the wild coyotes of Golden Gate Park “dangerous?”

No, not at all.

Another great shot by David Cruz – he’s Everywhere You Want To Be: 

Click to expand

So why do people say that coyotes are dangerous?

I don’t know.

Pit bull dogs and their negligent owners are dangerous tho, right?

San Francisco Chronicle Writer CW Nevius Is Always Wrong: Chapter 237, Sheriff Ross Mirkarimi Case

Wednesday, October 10th, 2012

Here’s the latest boner from CW Nevius regarding the Sheriff Ross Mirkarimi case:

“It’s not that Mirkarimi is expected to have much of a shot to win reinstatement. All the smart money at City Hall is predicting an 11-0 vote against his case. That way everyone has some political cover.”

So, once again, CW Nevius is totally wrong on an issue. And, once again, he will refuse to acknowledge his mistake.

Nevius, can’t you learn from your mistakes?

Oh well.

Ah, memories:

San Francisco Chronicle opinion “reporter” CW Nevius should stick to his opinions, IMO. Cause it’s when he mixes up his opinions with what he considers facts, that’s when the trouble starts.

Anyway, I don’t question his ability to get people to answer his phone calls and then offer quotes, but I do question his ability to understand what those people tell him.

Oh well.

Here it is, a Nevius column three-way mash-up, starting all the way back in the month of January 2012.

(And, as always, please keep in mind that The Nevius is NOT biased on this particular topic, not at all, like why would you even think that?)

“The neighbor who called authorities with concerns (and good for her) learned that the hard way. She reportedly said she only wanted to express concern, not to release the photo or the cell phone texts.”

SO, SOMEBODY  CALLS THE COPS TO “EXPRESS CONCERN?” WHO DOES THAT? SOMEBODY WHO’S HORRIBLY NAIVE, LIKE IVORY MADISON? AND SHE DOES IT WITH HER VERY OWN PERSONAL IPHONE? SO YOU CALL THE COPS AND TELL THEM YOU HAVE SOLID EVIDENCE OF A CRIME BUT YOU’RE NOT READY TO TURN IT OVER TO THEM. I MEAN, HOW MANY MINUTES WILL IT TAKE FOR THEM TO BE BANGING ON YOUR DOOR? OH WAIT, YOU POLITELY ASKED THEM _NOT_ TO STAR-69 YOU? WELL IN THAT CASE…

There are many people in law enforcement who dislike him and don’t think he is fit for the job.

THE THOUGHTS OF “MANY PEOPLE” ARE ALWAYS CONGRUENT WITH CW NEVIUS IN CW NEVIUS-LAND. HOW CONVENIENT!

There is a school of thought that says Mirkarimi should step gracefully away from the job now and get on with his life.

SEE? MORE “THOUGHT” FROM THE NEVE. NEVE IS UPSET THAT ROSS MIRKARIMI WON THE SHERIFF’S RACE, SO NEVE IS HAPPY TO SEE ROSS GO, OF COURSE.

There is the possibility that Mirkarimi could be angling for something like a plea of “no contest,” which doesn’t carry the stigma of a guilty plea.

UH, NEVIUS, HOW SIMPLE ARE YOU? HAVE YOU HEARD OF THE TERM BEFORE? DO YOU EXPECT YOUR READERS TO NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT “NO CONTEST” MEANS? AND OH, IT MEANS “GUILTY,” MORE OR LESS, SO YES, THERE’S A STIGMA ATTACHED TO NOT FIGHTING WHEN A DISTRICT ATTORNEY IS TRYING YOU FOR DOING SOMETHING WRONG. FOR _MOST_ PEOPLE, SUCH A PLEA CARRIES THE SAME STIGMA OF A GUILTY PLEA. AND, AS GOES WITHOUT SAYING, IT’S OUR RIGHT TO PLEA THAT WAY IN CALIFORNIA. YOU SEE, THERE’S NO “ANGLING,” THERE’S NO DEAL STRATEGERY REQUIRED, DESPITE WHAT YOU THINK, NEVE.

But to Mirkarimi, that may seem like caving in.

AS IT WOULD TO ANYONE.

Fighting the charges and winning would be the sweet vindication for Mirkarimi. He would never get tired of saying “I told you so,” and no one could blame him.

UH, I DON’T THINK HE WOULD GO AROUND SAYING “I TOLD YOU SO.” AND IF HE DID, PEOPLE COULD AND WOULD BLAME HIM.

Until now, I’ve gone along with the idea of letting the Ross Mirkarimi misdemeanor domestic battery case play out.

HOW GENEROUS OF YOU. ARE YOU THE FOURTH BRANCH OF GOVERNMENT, CW NEVIUS? AREN’T YOU MERELY AN EX-JOCK MOVIE REVIEWER? I THINK SO.

It is time for Mirkarimi to cut his losses. Clearly he is fighting for his political life. But that cannot be the only consideration. What about what is good for the city?

IN NEVIUS-LAND, EVERY POLITICIAN IN TOWN SHOULD BE A REPUBLICAN OR BUSINESS DEMOCRAT. PER NEVIUS, THAT’S WHAT WOULD BE “GOOD FOR THE CITY.” AND SINCE WHEN DO YOU CARE ABOUT THE GOOD OF THE CITY SO MUCH? HEY NEVIUS, DON’T YOU ACTUALLY OPPOSE THE CENTRAL SUBWAY? I THINK YOU DO, OR AT LEAST YOU USED TOREMEMBER HOW THE VERY THOUGHT OF IT MADE YOU “WINCE?” BUT YOU CAN’T VERY WELL OPPOSE IT NOW, CAN YOU, NOW THAT IT’S GOTTEN A LOT WORSE? WHAT WOULD THAT BE LIKE, NEVE, IF YOU WOULD VOICE YOUR CONCERNS OVER ROSE PAK’S SUBWAY TO NOWHERE, YOU KNOW, “FOR THE GOOD OF THE CITY?” ALL YOUR RECENT BEAT SWEETENER AND SOURCE GREASER COLUMNS, WELL, THEY’D BE FOR NAUGHT, RIGHT?

It wouldn’t be inconceivable that it would be the middle of March before a courtroom was assigned.

FRET NOT, NEVE, THE CITY OF SAN FRANCISCO ACTUALLY FOUND A PLACE TO HOLD A CRIMINAL TRIAL, BELIEVE IT OR NOT.

Although Ivory Madison’s biography says she attended law school, whether or not she was working as an attorney, or represented Lopez, is bound to be contentious. And that’s just one of the issues. The video is pivotal to the case, so there will probably be further challenges of that.

YOU KNOW NEVE, BY YOUR STANDARDS, YOUR ERRORS IN REPORTING THIS CASE AREN’T ALL THAT EGREGIOUS. HOWEVER, THIS BONER IS WHY YOU’RE IN THE SPANKING MACHINE AGAIN. IVORY MADISON NEED NOT HAVE BEEN ‘WORKING AS AN ATTORNEY” NOR “REPRESENTING” ANYBODY IN ORDER FOR THE ATTORNEY-CLIENT PRIVILEGE TO APPLY. YOU TALK TO EXPERTS, THEY TELL YOU THE RIGHT THING, AND THEN YOU SCREW IT UP, OVER AND OVER AND OVER. DON’T YOU HAVE AN EDITOR BY NOW? OR ARE YOU EMPOWERED TO WRITE WHATEVER CRAP YOU WANT AS LONG AS YOU MAKE MONEY(?) FOR THE SAN FRANCISCO CHRONICLE? DO YOU EVER ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR MANY MANY MISTAKES? DO YOU EVER ISSUE CORRECTIONS? ANYWHO, THE “CONTENTIOUS” ISSUES YOU WONDERED ABOUT WEREN’T CONTENTIOUS AT ALL, AS IT TURNED OUT, AND AS SHOULD HAVE BEEN OBVIOUS TO YOU. YES EVEN YOU.

A reasonable suggestion would be for him to plead no contest to the charges.

A REASONABLE SUGGESTION FROM A SUBURBAN-MINDED REPUBLICAN SUCH AS YOURSELF, THAT’S WHAT YOU MEAN.

He should admit mistakes, apologize, and lay out a plan of rehabilitation – anger management, family counseling and personal guidance. He could say he has seen his errors and faced up to them. Therefore, he could say, he should be allowed to remain on as sheriff. Keeping the job would be a long shot. Personally, I’d oppose it.

OK, SO IT’S “DO EVERYTHING I SAY AND THE REWARD WILL BE ME, THE NEVIUS, OPPOSING YOU FROM FULFILLING THE WISHES OF THE VOTERS.” IS THAT YOUR CARROT-AND-STICK APPROACH, NEVE? MORE LIKE STICK AND STICK, IT WOULD SEEM.

Today it is a public soap opera, with trial-stalling delays, media scrums in the courthouse, and open snickering about ex-girlfriends’ panties.

I THINK YOU MEAN PAIR OF PANTIES, NEVE. LIKE ONE ARTICLE OF CLOTHING. YOU SEE, THE WAY YOU SAID IT MADE IT SEEM LIKE THERE WERE MULTIPLE GFS AND MULTIPLE PAIRS OF FOUND PANTIES. OH, I SEE, WE’RE IN NEVIUS-LAND, WHERE A “REPORTER,” SUCH AS YOURSELF ISN’T HELD TO THE SAME STANDARDS AS ANY OTHER REPORTER. OK.

It all could have been avoided. I understand if Mirkarimi and Eliana Lopez, his wife, feel wronged and want to fight the charges. But instead of having their lawyers challenge each piece of evidence, get up on the stand, make your case – Lopez does sound convincing – and let a jury decide.

WOW, SO WILLIAM WALLACE SHOULD JUST HAVE GIVEN UP TO KING ED BEFORE THE BATTLE OF FALKIRK EVEN BEGAN? BAD FORM.

Granted, the videotape of Lopez crying and pointing to a bruise on her arm doesn’t look good. But Mirkarimi and Lopez’s lawyers aren’t disputing the facts or saying it is a fake. They’re trying to remove it on a legal technicality. Just let them play the tape and respond.

NOW WHO’S THE FAKE ATTORNEY, IVORY MADISON OR YOU, NEVIUS?

Meanwhile, those who predicted a one-week trial are getting a lesson in the speed of justice.

WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE, NEVIUS? WHO ARE THESE STRAWMEN?

As weeks tick away, insiders estimate that Mirkarimi’s legal fees could be running into six figures.

WOW, “INSIDERS!” INSIDERS SUCH AS YOURSELF, NEVE?

Legally, everything turns on the video of Mirkarimi’s wife.

WOW, YOU EXPLAIN THE COMPLEX LEGALITIES SO WELL, PROFESSOR CONVENTIONAL WISDOM NEVIUS, JD. YOUR INSIGHT IS BOTH BOLD AND UNIQUE (OR NOT).

Lopez’s attorney, Paula Canny, says because the tape was made by a neighbor, Ivory Madison, who has a law degree, the tape would be violating attorney-client privilege.

NOT EXACTLY, NEVE. WHAT MATTERED IS WHAT LOPEZ BELIEVED, OF COURSE, UNDER CA LAW. THAT’S NOT ALL THAT MATTERED OF COURSE, AS THIS GAMBIT FAILED, BUT ANYWAY. YOU’RE PUTTING WORDS IN HER MOUTH, NEVE. YOU HAVE NO FRAME OF REFERENCE, DONNY. YOU’RE LIKE A CHILD WHO WANDERS INTO THE MIDDLE OF A MOVIE…

It may be a plausible legal argument but it stops the trial dead…

NOT REALLY, AS IT TURNED OUT.

Because now after months of these charges, those panties, and that tape of his weeping and bruised wife, this will follow Mirkarimi the rest of his life.

AND IF THE TRIAL HAD OCCURRED, SOMEHOW, IN FEBRUARY 2012, THEN THIS SITUATION _WOULDN’T_ HAVE FOLLOWED MIRKARIMI AROUND FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE? IS THAT WHAT YOU’RE ARGUING?

Keane compared him to O.J. Simpson, which sounded like a stretch.

YOU MEAN IT SEEMD A STRETCH AT FIRST, TO YOUR SIMPLE MIND? IS THAT WHAT YOU MEAN?

Simpson was charged with murder, not spousal abuse.

I GET YOUR POINT ON THIS, NEVE, BUT YOU’RE SORT OF WRONG ON THIS SCORE.*

But there are similarities.

WASN’T THAT HIS FUCKING POINT, NEVE? YOUR READERS ARE SMARTER THAN YOU, NEVE. SO WHY DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE TO EXPLAIN THINGS TO THEM?

After a long, painful, media-frenzy of a trial, Simpson was acquitted.

OMG, THAT CHECKS OUT TOO!

But he was a public pariah, his reputation in tatters. Simpson must wonder if it was all worth it. My guess is Ross Mirkarimi will too.

WOW, GREAT GUESS, NEVE. IT’S JUST LIKE WITH HITLER, WHO DIDN’T EVEN NEED THE REICHSTAG FIRE DECREE TO SEIZE POWER. HITLER MUST HAVE WONDERED “IF IT WAS ALL WORTH IT” OR LIKE WITH YOUR BUDDY, MAYOR ED LEE, WHO DIDN’T EVEN NEED STENCIL VOTING AND ROSE PAK TO WIN ELECTION. ED LEE MUST HAVE WONDERED “IF IT WAS ALL WORTH IT” AS WELL, HUH?

YOU’VE GIVEN US ALL A LOT TO THINK ABOUT, NEVE.

*Sort of. Actually OJ was charged with domestic violence too, before he was charged with killing that gal and that guy. I’ll give you just one guess what his plea was…