Posts Tagged ‘cyclist’

Drinking Coffee to Warm Up While Driving to Work, Market Street, USA – Look Ma, No Hands!

Wednesday, September 23rd, 2015

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Explaining How This Cyclist Got a California Stop Ticket at 6th & Cabrillo While I’ve Gotten Zero Tickets in 25 Years

Wednesday, September 9th, 2015

This is the scene from two days back, southbound 6th Ave betwixt Cabrillo and Balboa.

I’m assuming the bike rider got a ticket, ‘specially since he seemed to be ignoring the cop even after siren whooped once, and then again.

And here’s the thing – Bro slowed way down for the stop sign, on a pretty big slope, he showed respect for the stop sign, about as much as the typical car driver would have. Even so, the Richmond Station cop on the dirt bike pulled him over anyway. See?

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I myself, heading north, back to The City, didn’t have a chance to come to a complete stop before I heard the whoop-whoop noise, but I certainly did after.

Anyway, here’s the thing – the cyclist either didn’t see the cop coming west on Cabrillo OR the cyclist ignored the cop ’cause he didn’t think he’d get pulled over.

If I were the cyclist coming downhill, I DEFINITELY would have seen the cop and I certainly would have come to a complete stop once I saw the cop.

Gentle Reader, how many people living today have more time on a bike in SF County the past quarter-century than I? Precious few, I’ll tell you. Junior the Bike Messenger, certainly, and most of your career-level SF messengers, and some of the “founders” of Critical Mass still living in town, certainly. And, due to a couple somewhat-SFMTA/MUNI-related mishaps, this has been a bad year. However, I’m still in the 99th percentile, and I’ll tell you:

You gotta show respect for the po-po, unless you want to spend hundreds and thousands on tickets over your lifetime on a bike in Frisco.

Is this two-faced? I suppose. But what do you want me to do? I California stop on bikes, and in cars. It depends on the circumstances. And one of the big circumstances is if a cop is right there looking at you. Of course one should be looking around all the time anyway, for other bikes, for cars, trucks, peds, everything

Admittedly, bikes were (seemingly) invisible to the SFPD back in the 80’s and 90’s, so I had a bit of an advantage over the riders of today. But my biggest advantage is paying attention – that’s the key.


Anyway, that’s why I have more miles and fewer citations than the average…

Exploring Alternatives to the Crowded, Problematic “The Wiggle” Bike Route – “RIDE OAK?” – Sure, or McAllister

Friday, August 14th, 2015

Here you go:

Due to police harassment on the SF Wiggle we have no choice but to ride Oak.”


Well, let’s see, there are LOTS of reasons to not ride the vaunted THE WIGGLE route and also, there are other options asides from OAK.

But let’s consider Oak now. Oh, here’s famous fixie-riding Andy on the left side of Oak, from all the way back in aught-seven.


And look, the dashed lines made a sort of bike lane on the left side – good times. (Unfortunately, this space for bikes is no longer there, due to subsequent restriping.)

Anywho, going straight on Oak instead of taking the Wiggle at Scott is nice because you’ve only got one sort of steep block. I see people take Oak all the time. Oak is good. Oak is fast. Oak is congested a lot of the time due to horrible horrible Octavia Boulevard (what was dreamed up by wealthy homeowners in Hayes Valley), so you’d spend some time weaving about, getting around drivers trying to get on the I-80 / the 101 superslabs, but that’s OK. I’ll add that Oak is for the adventurous, certainly.

So, Oak is far from being a ridiculous choice, a choice TO TEACH US ALL A LESSON about the dangers of the SFPD handing out citations. It’s a viable option.

Or what of Oak and Baker to Fulton to Divisadero to Mcallister to Market? This is THE UNWIGGLE with no wiggling at all betwixt Divis and Market. And look, you’ve defeated the rich people of HV who put a 105 foot wide BOULEVARD betwixt you and your destination, ’cause Octavia is but a nothingburger walking path / federal housing project parking lot on this route – it won’t slow you down at all.

Or Fulton? It’s a bit hillier than McAll and you’ve got big old City Hall in your way, but it’ll do.

Or Golden Gate? That works too.

Or Haight all the way to Fillmore, just to avoid the congested THE WIGGLE?

Notice that all these routes avoid “cycling” a bunch of people through the stop signs at WALLER and STEINER in the Lower Haight.

Those are some of your inbound routes.

As far as using Fell to go back home, well that’s CRAZY TOWN, that’s ill-advised. I rarely have seen that, in all my years.

IMO, the best way to get back is MCALLISTER


…of course, there are other non-THE WIGGLE choices as well.

But feel free to do whatever you want, commiserate with this knucklehead, who lacks self-awareness, as you both deal with $238 tickets from John Law.

Just saying…

Cyclist Gets Hassled by The Man on the Quite Narrow Golden Gate Park Panhandle Bike Path

Thursday, August 13th, 2015

Just a warning from the SFPD, looked like:

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Over the years, this multi-use path has been widened from four foot wide lanes to the current six foot wide lanes. Why not make it an even eight per lane, for a total of 16 feet wide?

Here’s What Your Bicycle Needs: A Gasoline Engine, So You Can Sound Like a Motorcycle – But Where’s the Helmet?

Friday, July 24th, 2015

Bro just goes around the block around the block lately, with no particular destination in mind – or so it appears.

Anywho, in CA, you need an approved helmet to legally operate this kind of motorized bicycle:

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It makes such a big noise considering how small a ride it is…

Brocephus Update: Popping a Wheelie Block After Block in the Golden Gate Park Panhandle – Look Ma, One Hand!

Thursday, July 23rd, 2015

Our Golden Gate Park Panhandle bike path / performance stage:

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“Emergency Ride Home” – Will San Francisco Pay For Your Taxi Ride Home If You Bike to Work and Get a Flat Tire? Yes

Tuesday, April 28th, 2015

Here it is, from the San Francisco Department of the Environment:

Emergency Ride Home

This program is similar to those offered by Stanford U, UCMarin County and your major corporations.*

So, if you power your Nissan Leaf all-electric car or ZERO all-electric motorcycle with clean Hetch Hetchy hydroelectricity, SFGov is saying that your commute to work isn’t “sustainable.” OTOH, if you ride in a diesel MUNI bus, your commute is “sustainable? OK, maybe.

Hey, what about the method that SFGov uses to fund retirement pay and medical benefits for all its employees, past, present, and future? Is that sustainable, SFGov? Oh no? OK, SFGov.

And if one of my bikes gets a flat tire, have I ever said to myself, “Oh no, it’s an emergency!”


But one supposes that if you had some free money to spend and you wanted to appeal to your bo-bo constituancy, you’d offer the same program.

ASSIGNMENT DESK: Well, this one writes itself. The hardest part will be finding an appealing subject who’s actually used this program already. Take some photos of the victim, you know, probably a her, and make sure have the Financh in the background in the photos, and then throw in a few quotes from a Department Head, and BAM! – you’ve got yourself a Story.

End Of Line

*At some places down in the valley, if you get sick at work your Free Ride Home will be so, so baller, you’ll feel like a billionaire, you know, temporarily anyway, and you’ll tell all your friends about it, and they’ll be so impressed.


KRON-TV’s Big Stanley Roberts vs. the Little Lebowski of the Southern Wiggle: “I Don’t Want To Release This Footage”

Friday, April 24th, 2015

Welcome to ‘Merica, Dude:

Oh No, Shaming! – “Referee the Wiggle” Event Coming April 23rd to “Red Card” Cyclists at Infamous Waller and Steiner

Wednesday, April 15th, 2015

I’ll tell you, I’m not a big fan of the vaunted The Wiggle bike route and here’s why:


That’s why. This was my stab at promoting the Northern Wiggle,* aka the McAllister Pass,** aka the Hastings Cutoff. *** Some people listened, but most did not, oh well.

Anyway, aside from this route being a third of a mile shorter and faster and safer and relatively ped-free, it NEVER gets any SFPD Bicycle Enforcement Actions, the way, say, the intersection of Waller and Steiner gets.

Speaking of which, now more people are joining the SFPD, to “referee the Wiggle,” if only for a short time.

Here it is:

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“Referee the Wiggle
Thursday, April 23, 2015, 3:00pm – 3:30 pm
Waller and Steiner st – The Wiggle

While 95% of cyclists using the Wiggle are really incredibly respectful of other road users, there is that small minority who give us all a bad name. I’ve always wanted to dress as a referee and hand out yellow and red cards to bad cyclists (and maybe some cars and peds too) and I’m using NOW! as my excuse!

Come join me in shaming the few bad cyclists out there and making the Wiggle just a little bit safer and more courteous!”

*I, myself, wiggle from street to street north of the Panhandle on my way inbound to Fulton and Scott – it depends on traffic.

**The pass over Alamo Heights, which the Southern Wiggle route mostly avoids by generally following the route of the former creek what used to drain the kind of valley where the Golden Gate Park Panhandle sits now.

***Named for Landsford Hastings, a distant cousin, surely, of UC Hastings’ Justice Serranus Clinton Hastings.

Frisco Traffic – Big Wheel Up Front, Tiny Wheel Out Back – Are Pennyfarthings Legal on the Streets of San Francisco?

Thursday, April 9th, 2015

IDK. These rides certainly were not legal on CA streets a while back, but I’d have to look up what the current law says, something about being able to skid a wheel on dry pavement.

Anyway, here you go, in the Golden Gate Park Panhandle:

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Dorsal view:

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