Posts Tagged ‘dpw’

The Catch Basin Keeper’s Creed: “This is my catch basin. There are many like it, but this one is mine”

Thursday, December 11th, 2014

This is my catch basin. There are many like it, but this one is mine.

My adoptive catch basin is doing great – so far so good, during DeathStorm14:

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My catch basin is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life.
My catch basin, without me, is useless. Without my catch basin, I am useless. I must clear my catch basin true.
My catch basin is human, even as I, because it is my life. Thus, I will learn it as a brother. I will learn its weaknesses, its strength, its parts, and accessories. I will repeated stab at it with a broom handle. I will keep my catch basin clean and ready, even as I am clean and ready. We will become part of each other. We will…
Before God, I swear this creed. My catch basin and I are the defenders of my City and County. We are the masters of our Enemy, the Pineapple Express. We are the saviors of my life.
So be it, until victory is San Francisco’s and there is no Death Storm, but peace!

With nearly 23,000 catch basins in SF, we need your help to report issues! Call 311 or use the mobile app

Here’s a Clue About How Uber / Uber-X was Evil Going Back Two Years Ago – Marketing on Market Street

Wednesday, December 10th, 2014

Here’s why I’m not an employee of the Uber:

Cause like every day I’d be saying, “Can we do that? I don’t think we can do that. Can we say that? I don’t think we can say that.”

I’d be a big Captain Bringdown / Jiminy Cricket.

Like here, a couple years back, on Market. I passed by this scene and so then I contacted the Uber people by email on my cell…

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…and I was all, “Can you do that? I don’t think you can do that.”

Why? Because it’s a chalk ad on a Frisco sidewalk and that aint kosher.

I mean, I didn’t know for sure, maybe somebody had approved this and the Uber people had permits, who knows. I was simply “issue-spotting,” as they say.

So then, a half-hour later, the Uberers had these ads hastily obliterated, more or less, as best they could.

Ah, memories…

Attention Tour Bus Operators: After a Fender-Bender, Get Your Rigs Out of the Middle Lane of Oak Street – Don’t Be Calling Your Insurance Agent

Wednesday, October 29th, 2014

So, yes, you had a little fender-bender with your big bus, and yes, it was related to the endless tinkering  done by the SFMTA MUNI DPT DPW bowl of alphabet soup. So what! It’s not that big of a deal. CSI San Francisco isn’t going to send it’s Go Team and the NTSB isn’t coming neither.

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Therefore, get your bus out of the roadway, pull it over. Sure, take a couple iPhone shots first, sure. But then get outta the way. THIS IS SFPD POLICY. Don’t you know this? You had at least two employees on the scene, why not have one, I don’t know, let’s call him the Driver, drive the bus to one side of the road or the other. Did you call the SFPD? IDK, but if you did, don’t you want them to show up? Now, how are they going to do that if you block the road, which, as stated, is a noteworthy bottleneck already, due to ongoing construction efforts, for umpty-ump minutes?

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I cry foul.

“Quake Shaming,” Frisco-Style: Millionaire Property Owners Won’t Like Seeing These Large EARTHQUAKE WARNING Postings

Thursday, October 23rd, 2014

I’d heard of these newish warnings, but hadn’t actually seen them.

Les mise-en-scene

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Complete with exclamation points:

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Is this what they call an “unfunded mandate?”

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Ah tink so!

Nike is Going to Tow Your Car This Saturday Night If You’ve Parked on Certain Blocks of Gough, GG, Webster, Fulton, Scott, Fell…

Friday, October 17th, 2014

I’ve already made this post, but I’ve just come across the route map for 2014’s Nike Women’s Half Marathon, and if this tiny blog can prevent just one unnecessary tow-job this weekend, well that’s blogesse oblige, mon frere.

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If I were Nike, of Beaverton, Oregon, I’d refund the $500-$1000 tow fees that a bunch of San Franciscans are going to be getting come Sunday morning, on a case-by-case basis.

If I were Nike…

All the deets on street closures:

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The Towman Cometh: That AutoReturn Co. Will Make a Ton of Money Tomorrow Night on Fell – Nike Women’s Half-Marathon

Friday, October 17th, 2014

Well, this is new, the routing of this year’s Nike Women’s Half Marathon San Francisco.

Nike, Inc is going to blow through Fell Street like an autumnal version of the Bay to Breakers historic street party and fun run.

Take a look – here are the new signs DPW just put out, like a string of pearls through the Panhandle:

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Note the timing of the mass towings has recently been altered. Can you see the 5 AM hiding under the white sticker what says 11 PM? I’m sure there’s a story behind that.

Anywho, this pop-up event is unexpected so it’s going to catch a lot of people by surprise.

What’s that, “outreach?” Oh yeah, Nike sent out a ton of letters to residents, customized for each mile of the route. I myself got one, but then forgot about it until I saw all these signs.

Nevertheless, even with the letters, this pop-up event is unexpected so it’s going to catch a lot of people by surprise. 

You’ll see.

Sunset District Update: DPW Paints a Special “STOP” Stencil in the Bike Lane at 17th and Kirkham – But the World Fails to Notice

Monday, October 6th, 2014

Photo of Kirkham St. at 17th Avenue – the tiny “STOP” stencil is a recent addition:

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And here’s an on-the-scene report to go with the image:

“Kirkham St.(Sunset District) has a bicycle lane with very few riders. All summer DPW was working on the part of Kirkham St east of 19th Avenue.

When DPW finished at the end of August 2014, they repaved the street, re-striped the lanes, put back the pedestrian islands.

The large STOP painted on the road for vehicle drivers didn’t mean much for bicyclists. They run thru intersections all the time. Now DPW painted a Stop sign in the bicycle lane!

The special Stop for bicyclists hasn’t made any difference. They still blast thru intersections on Kirkham St. and ignore their personal stop sign.”

I don’t know, if I were putting a bike lane on Kirkham, I’d prolly prevent cars from parking so close to the crosswalk. (In “sustainable streets” parlance, this is called “daylighting” an intersection, but I don’t actually know the normal term for maintaining sight lines at intersections so that peds may be seen.)

We’ll just have to wait and see how many people use these new lanes….

DPW’s Grisly Tableau – But Safety First, I Suppose

Friday, September 26th, 2014

Here it is:

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I suppose it’s OK for the DPW to lecture me about bike/ ped safety. But hey, DPW, would you, in turn, want to listen to me about the safety of your operations, about a culture of safety for your employees? Oh, no, not really?

OK fine…

San Francisco Garbage Can, Lunchtime, Japantown – What Did It Look Like by Suppertime?

Thursday, September 18th, 2014

See?

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Appears as if The City That Knows How doesn’t know how to maintain its garbage cans, sometimes.

Our Long Parochial Nightmare is Over: The Vandalized Slides at Panhandle Playground 94117 have been Replaced by RPD

Monday, September 8th, 2014

Well the slides at the Panhandle Playground have been replaced after three months of absence.

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1. Perhaps the RPD spokesmodel meant that the entire slide complex was being repaired, as opposed to the $2000 plastic slide itself. I don’t think it would have made sense to repair the slide itself, due to liability issues for starters. This is a brand-new slide, one that’s similar enough to the original.

2. So some wealthy, non-profit people came by with clipboards to say that this particular playground currently earns a “D” grade? Well, OK fine, but if you talk to the people who actually use the place, they, more or less, give it an “A” grade, you know, except for the slide that wasn’t there all summer long. Mmmmm… What’s up with that?

3. Supervisor London Breed’s office was unresponsive to the email contact sent by a group of concerned parents, apparently. So she gets an “F,” or an Incomplete perhaps. (I’ve worked at two similar offices, with about ten or one hundred times as many constituents, and if the elected in charge found out about something like this then there’d be a 20-minute yell-fest and/or a passive aggressive note sent to a (lower-case “s”) supervisor to “fix this.”) So, obvs, a “communication issue” occurred, I just don’t know how common this is with her office.

4. RPD has a policy to not repair anything in a playground if it’s due to be revamped in the next two years? That’s my understanding. Does that mean that this playground won’t get revamped anytime soon? That’s my understanding. Why’s that? Read on, Gentle Reader.

5. What RPD really wants is area parents to get together to raise something on the order of [bites right pinkie finger] one million dollars, you know, the way they do things in rich areas of SF, like Sea Cliff (ala the new Mountain Lake) and Presidio Heights. Only then will RPD put your playground at the top of the fix-it list? OK fine. The funny thing is that most of the money that gets used to refurbish existing playgrounds is paid for by the non-rich, from some bond. But all this doesn’t matter for the playground at hand, because:

6. The slide vandalized in May 2014 has been replaced in September 2014 and the users are now satisfied. No $5,000,000 modernization from the RPD is needed, frankly. [Oh what’s that, RPD – this old-school playground costs you a lot of coin to maintain? Well, then why don’t you fix it up, RPD, you know, using the money we give you?]

And that’s the end of this story.