Posts Tagged ‘Ed Reiskin’

Big Pimping: SFMTA MUNI DPT CEO Ed Reiskin Approves of This Giant American Apparel Ad – A Lesson in Sexy

Thursday, March 27th, 2014

Click to expand

Ed Reiskin’s Sexy Tips for Girls – How to Earn Money and Support MUNI at the Same Time

Friday, February 7th, 2014

IDK, did  MUNI chief Ed Reiskin condone this particular MUNI bus ad?

It sure looks that way!

Now the way to make this ad, leaving aside all the other Photoshop stuff, is to rotate the shot 90 degrees counterclockwise. See? I’m just saying that gravity doesn’t work this way IRL. 

Click to expand

Remember Ed, you can’t spell obsequious without I-O-U my job, “strong” Mayor Ed Lee.

Hey Ed Reiskin! Is it a good idea to  charge money for parking meters on Sundays? Oh it is? Oh great!

But oh, Ed Reiskin, Ed Lee has decided that he can’t tolerate the SFMTA charging money for parking meters on Sundays. Oh what’s that, you’ve all of a sudden changed your mind on this issue and now you don’t like Sunday parking meters?

OK fine.

Cold Busted: Do SFMTA Parking Control Officers Even Try to Follow the Law? Take a Look

Thursday, January 9th, 2014

Leave us review California Vehicle Code Section 40202(a):

“The notice of parking violation shall also set forth … the last four digits of the vehicle identification number, if that number is readable through the windshield...”

Except some DPT meter maids are in the habit of not writing down the last four digits of the VIN. Check it:

Some SFMTA parking citation officers thought they found a loophole by simply entering “cannot read,” “covered,” or “unable to locate” in the VIN field space of a citation. 

03/07/12: Officer NW (Badge #206) wrote 66 citations of which he said he “cannot read” the VIN plate information on all 66 of them!  

02/01/12: Officer TA (Badge #12) wrote 27 citations of which he said he “cannot read” the VIN plate information on all 27 of them.”

So am I saying I believe the factual statements of some random Change.org petition over anything spun out by the SFMTA?

Yes, yes I am.

Now is this VIN requirement kind of a technicality, and is it kind of a pain to be looking for VINs when the PCOs need to make their quotas in order to pay for Ed Reiskin’s generous benefits package? Yes and yes.

But that’s the law. Perhaps the SFMTA should try to change the law if it’s so hard to obey.

Let’s hope that the SFMTA keeps a closer eye on its PCOs in the future…

Now let’s travel back to the past:

Via the excellent Uptown Almanac comes news of this anti-MUNI bumper sticker campaign:

Beej Weir with deets here and here.

“The bottom of the sticker reads: “ASSAULTING A PARKING CONTROL OFFICER IS A CRIME. SO DON’T GET CAUGHT.”- WACKO 1

As previously noted, harsh.

California Penal Code 241 — Assault, punishment. (“(b) When an assault is committed against the person of a parking control officer engaged in the performance of his or her duties, and the person committing the offense knows or reasonably should know that the victim is a parking control officer, the assault is punishable by a fine not exceeding two thousand dollars ($2,000), or by imprisonment in the county jail not exceeding six months, or by both the fine and imprisonment.”

So much for “Good People, Tough Jobs.”

OMG, “Parking Angels” Help You Stick It To The Man: Reduce Tickets via the “SF Parking Alliance”

Monday, November 18th, 2013

All the deets:

Join the SF Parking Alliance - A COMMUNITY EFFORT TO REDUCE PARKING CITATIONS

HOW IT WORKS
1) Somebody sees a car that is about to get a parking ticket
2) They see that the car is registered with SF Parking Alliance
3) They text SF Parking Alliance (415-968-5137) your call sign
4) We forward the text to you and hopefully you move your car!
5) You respond to the text with a thank you and we anonymously forward it

So in this case, the car owner’s handle is GOGIANTS. If you see his/her ride about to get ticketed/towed, you’re supposed to send out a text

Click to expand

I don’t know how often this system has worked to take food out of the mouths of Harvard Boy Ed Reiskin’s kids. Perhaps never.

But it’s the thought that counts, right?

The SFMTA Gods Must Be Crazy – Absurd Painted Lines on JFK Drive Confuse Handicapped Parker

Monday, November 4th, 2013

Let’s see, how can I phrase this? How about:

New JFK bike lanes are bad for everyone

Or this, whichever.

Now, on to new bidness. Check out these handicapped parking spaces on JFK Drive outbound just past the Conservatory of Flowers in Golden Gate Park.

The driver of the car on the right has a valid handicapped placard so she parked her ride right next to the blue-painted curb with her two right wheels well within the 18 inch maximum allowed under the law. Which would be job done in most places in CA. But what grandma doesn’t know is that this stretch of JFK Drive is now Harvard-Boy Ed Reiskin* Crazy Land.

In HBERCL, drivers should park their vehicles 18 feet from the curb, as shown by the jelly bean shaped Lexus** RX on the left.

Click to expand

Does this make any sense?

I’ll tell you, my nana isn’t driving these days owing to her recent stomach surgery, but what would I tell her if she wanted to park her Hyundai in GGP?

I’d tell her, welcome to Harvard-Boy Ed Reiskin Crazy Land. I’m saying that I feel sorry for handicapped drivers who are confused by the one-of-a-kind-in-the-world layout that was just installed to make a political point and to respond to pressure from local political groups. I’m saying that the SFMTA should take account of the users of JFK, you know, grandmothers from Nevada, families from Daly City, you know, the people who are invisible to the SFMTA. I’m saying I feel sorry for this particular*** frustrated grandmother.

Hey SFMTA! Your crazy painted lines are not a “huge success.”

Hey SFMTA! What are you going to do about fixing JFK Drive for its users? Oh nothing, because you think it’s perfect because it was just put in by the SFMTA?

OK fine.

But IRL, what you’ve done is not perfect.

Not perfect at all.

* Hi Ed! Hey, do you know what happened to Jin Lai last month? His guts were squeezed out of his body “like toothpaste coming out of a tube.” A better-run MUNI would have these guards installed 99.something percent of the time, right? And MUNI could be better-run using the same amount of money that we’re giving you now, right? Are you the best person in the world to run MUNI? Obviously, you inherited a bunch of ingrained practices, but you wanted this job, right? You get paid big bucks to do this job, right? What kind of grade would you give yourself on this incident, Ed? If it’s not an “F,” you’re in denial. Deep denial. 

**Grandma’s placard is almost certainly legit. The one on the Lexus has about a 50-50 chance of being legit. If it were a V8 or V12 Mercedes Benz, those odds would go down to about 10%. That’s how it goes with CA’s corrupt free parking handicapped placard honor system.

***She ended up hanging a Louie and motored off, as there were no spaces available at this time.

Now MUNI is Supporting the Oakland Raiders? And is “EQUALITY FOR ALL” Political? How About “HOUSING FOR ALL?”

Thursday, August 15th, 2013

So I can understand how SFMTA MUNI DPT SFBC puts up GO GIANTS! and GO BULLS! (the local hockey team) and even GO 49ERS!, but what about ads for teams that aren’t even in the towns that MUNI serves like GO WARRIORS! and, indeed, GO RAIDERS!

Thusly:

Click to expand

So what’s next?

Will Ed Reiskin put up FAIR HARVARD?

Will Ron Conway have something put up like “We Stand With Boston?

The point is that MUNI doesn’t have any standards, it just puts up whatever it wants for whatever reason.

Of course, this year we saw a lot of EQUALITY FOR ALL during Pride so why not next year have something like “HOUSING FOR ALL?”

So asks blogger Mike Petrelis and the B.A.R.

(BTW, when MUNI spokesmodel Paul Rose says something like, “I will be sure to include your request for consideration,” what he really means is FUUUUUUUUUCK YOUUUUUUU, GO TO HELL..)

We’ll just have to wait and see how this one goes…

Wasteful SFMTA is Now Making Money Off Of Sidecar Ads – Isn’t It Ironic? – Dont’cha Think?

Thursday, August 1st, 2013

Like rain on your wedding day, our ineffectual SFMTA is now taking money from hated interloping  rival Sidecar:

Click to expand

Oh Ed Reiskin, will you ever win?

Bonus: Much whiter teeth than what you’ll find on MUNI, passenger and driver alike

Here’s Why MUNI Basing Its Fares on Your Income Will Never Be “Cost Neutral” – Expansionist SFMTA – Through With the Two-Step

Monday, December 3rd, 2012

Here’s the news:

“Reiskin said he’d like to develop a fare system that cuts down on the red tape and provides discounts for those who need them, and full-fare rates for those who don’t. Reiskin said the program ideally would be cost-neutral, with prosperous older riders paying increased fares and lower-income adults paying less.”

Now of course MUNI wants more money money money all the time time time.

So of course, you could concoct a scheme that would be cost-neutral, at first, anyway.

But that wouldn’t be the point of the exercise.

The point of the exercise would be to raise revenue for MUNI by subsequently raising fares for the average rider.

So, step one is to change the fare structure to make step two viable.

Step two is to raise fares.

I see what you’re doing there, MUNI.

Well, myself, I’m through with the two-step.

Yet another car on Market Street* delaying MUNI:

Click to expand

*The only way the driver of the white wagon could have been at fault in this collision was if she had raced passed the orange streetcar by illegally driving the wrong way on the wrong side of Market. 

 

Edward Reiskin SFMTA Photo Shoot – “C’Mon, Baby – Arch Your Back Even More” – Mobile Porn for the 415

Friday, September 28th, 2012

I ask you, what kind of message does the SFMTA send out when it green-lights stuff like this?

Something like “We’ll do anything for money?”

Click to expand

 

MUNI Goes After the T-Shirts of a Harmless Local Blogger – The SFMTA Simply Can’t Manage Its Affairs

Wednesday, September 12th, 2012

So Ed Reiskin went to Harvard so he could be a do-boy for Willie Brown / Gavin Newsom / Ed Lee?

It looks that way.

Hey, why isn’t the head of MUNI an elected position? Mmmm…

Anyway, here’s the latest. Our SFMTA / MUNI / DPT, speaking through the City Attorney’s Office, doesn’t like being made fun of, so they’re going after individual Zazzle T-shirt makers.

Read all about it here and here.

Via the N Judah Chronicles photostream

In related news, remember this one, about the MUNI* Death Spiral? Look to see who, along with Joe Eskenazi, wrote that.

In closing, MUNI sucks, even harder than you think.

*Man, the stuff hit the fan at MUNI after that bit came out. There was a big meeting presided over by the guy who preceded Ed Reiskin. Actually, that guy later claimed to have not even read that bit. Anyway, this epic meeting that never happened is now enshrined in local lore. Ask your favorite City Family member about it sometime.