Posts Tagged ‘golden gate’

Twitterloin Update: Highly-Rated Kahn & Keville Mechanics Mock Vladimir Putin for Losing His Siberian Tiger to China

Wednesday, October 7th, 2015

Well, this is News To Me:

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Poor Pooty!

BTW, Kahn & Keville has a verrry high Yelp rating, just saying.

World’s Largest Stop Sign, at Fulton and 47th Avenue

Tuesday, September 22nd, 2015

Note human, for scale:

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One assumes it might have something to do with this, Contract 2419J?

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Science Corner: Standing Waves, COSCO Indonesia, Golden Gate

Thursday, September 10th, 2015

I guess that’s what they’re called?

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Exploring Alternatives to the Crowded, Problematic “The Wiggle” Bike Route – “RIDE OAK?” – Sure, or McAllister

Friday, August 14th, 2015

Here you go:

Due to police harassment on the SF Wiggle we have no choice but to ride Oak.”


Well, let’s see, there are LOTS of reasons to not ride the vaunted THE WIGGLE route and also, there are other options asides from OAK.

But let’s consider Oak now. Oh, here’s famous fixie-riding Andy on the left side of Oak, from all the way back in aught-seven.


And look, the dashed lines made a sort of bike lane on the left side – good times. (Unfortunately, this space for bikes is no longer there, due to subsequent restriping.)

Anywho, going straight on Oak instead of taking the Wiggle at Scott is nice because you’ve only got one sort of steep block. I see people take Oak all the time. Oak is good. Oak is fast. Oak is congested a lot of the time due to horrible horrible Octavia Boulevard (what was dreamed up by wealthy homeowners in Hayes Valley), so you’d spend some time weaving about, getting around drivers trying to get on the I-80 / the 101 superslabs, but that’s OK. I’ll add that Oak is for the adventurous, certainly.

So, Oak is far from being a ridiculous choice, a choice TO TEACH US ALL A LESSON about the dangers of the SFPD handing out citations. It’s a viable option.

Or what of Oak and Baker to Fulton to Divisadero to Mcallister to Market? This is THE UNWIGGLE with no wiggling at all betwixt Divis and Market. And look, you’ve defeated the rich people of HV who put a 105 foot wide BOULEVARD betwixt you and your destination, ’cause Octavia is but a nothingburger walking path / federal housing project parking lot on this route – it won’t slow you down at all.

Or Fulton? It’s a bit hillier than McAll and you’ve got big old City Hall in your way, but it’ll do.

Or Golden Gate? That works too.

Or Haight all the way to Fillmore, just to avoid the congested THE WIGGLE?

Notice that all these routes avoid “cycling” a bunch of people through the stop signs at WALLER and STEINER in the Lower Haight.

Those are some of your inbound routes.

As far as using Fell to go back home, well that’s CRAZY TOWN, that’s ill-advised. I rarely have seen that, in all my years.

IMO, the best way to get back is MCALLISTER


…of course, there are other non-THE WIGGLE choices as well.

But feel free to do whatever you want, commiserate with this knucklehead, who lacks self-awareness, as you both deal with $238 tickets from John Law.

Just saying…

If You’ve Got $30k for Tuition: San Francisco Day School Open House May 2, 2015 – Oh, Scholarships Available

Friday, May 1st, 2015

One isn’t sure how one wins a scholarship at the young age of four years old, but anyway.

If you won’t go to Marin, Marin will move to you, at the crossroads of Golden Gate and Masonic

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Here’s the copy (that, I’ll tell you, I would have written differently, but anyway):

“Tour our school, learn about our academic program & meet our teachers! Fall 2016 applicants may begin scheduling events in September 2015. This event is intended for, but not limited to, our neighbors and those who are not eligible to join the admission events in the fall.”

I’ll tell you, there are other schools in town [cough, Presidio Knolls*] who’ll look you right in the eye and say, more or less, we don’t want you, we don’t want your kid, and we don’t want your money. Ouch.

(This whole process of getting your kid into a private school after rolling snake-eyes in the SFUSD “lottery” can be like joining a sorority, just saying. Welcome to San Francisco!)

Anyway, there’s an Open House, just saying.

*Located not in the Presidio, but in the flats South of the Slot, oh well. Also, not to be confused with Presidio Hill.

KRON-TV’s Big Stanley Roberts vs. the Little Lebowski of the Southern Wiggle: “I Don’t Want To Release This Footage”

Friday, April 24th, 2015

Welcome to ‘Merica, Dude:

Oh No, Shaming! – “Referee the Wiggle” Event Coming April 23rd to “Red Card” Cyclists at Infamous Waller and Steiner

Wednesday, April 15th, 2015

I’ll tell you, I’m not a big fan of the vaunted The Wiggle bike route and here’s why:


That’s why. This was my stab at promoting the Northern Wiggle,* aka the McAllister Pass,** aka the Hastings Cutoff. *** Some people listened, but most did not, oh well.

Anyway, aside from this route being a third of a mile shorter and faster and safer and relatively ped-free, it NEVER gets any SFPD Bicycle Enforcement Actions, the way, say, the intersection of Waller and Steiner gets.

Speaking of which, now more people are joining the SFPD, to “referee the Wiggle,” if only for a short time.

Here it is:

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“Referee the Wiggle
Thursday, April 23, 2015, 3:00pm – 3:30 pm
Waller and Steiner st – The Wiggle

While 95% of cyclists using the Wiggle are really incredibly respectful of other road users, there is that small minority who give us all a bad name. I’ve always wanted to dress as a referee and hand out yellow and red cards to bad cyclists (and maybe some cars and peds too) and I’m using NOW! as my excuse!

Come join me in shaming the few bad cyclists out there and making the Wiggle just a little bit safer and more courteous!”

*I, myself, wiggle from street to street north of the Panhandle on my way inbound to Fulton and Scott – it depends on traffic.

**The pass over Alamo Heights, which the Southern Wiggle route mostly avoids by generally following the route of the former creek what used to drain the kind of valley where the Golden Gate Park Panhandle sits now.

***Named for Landsford Hastings, a distant cousin, surely, of UC Hastings’ Justice Serranus Clinton Hastings.

Appalling Corner Cutting from the Vaunted SFMTA: Newly-Installed Clean-Sheet Traffic Signal Poles on Masonic

Thursday, April 9th, 2015

[All right, a little background. Who’s been in charge of the crosswalk in front of City Hall on Polk? IDK, somebody in SFGov, like the SFMTA, or an agency from before the SFMTA, or DPW, or, no matter, somebody in SFGov, anyway, right? And these people know that driver compliance rates with whatever half-assed “smart” control scheme they installed is a lot lower than the compliance rate with simple red-yellow-green signals. But then, with regular dumb traffic lights, pedestrians would have to wait, at least part of the time, to cross the street to get to the Great Hall of The People and we can’t have that, right? So when a tour bus driver runs over an SFGov worker going back to the office, it’s all the tour bus driver’s fault, right? Well, yes and no. The BOS can vote 11-0 to regulate tour bus operators, but that ignores its own responsibility, non? Oh what’s that, you were going to get around to installing a traffic signal there, but you just hadn’t gotten around to it? And what’s that, you can’t figure out how to do it with the money we already give you, so we need to give you more more more? All right, fine, but that means you’re a part of the safety problem, not the solution, SFTMA / SFGov, at least in this case. Moving on…]

What the Hell is this, this brand new aluminum(?) light pole above Masonic betwixt the Golden Gate and Turk “high injury* corridors.” Believe it or not, you’re looking at signal lights for northbound Masonic traffic at Golden Gate AND ALSO, on the other side, for southbound Masonic at Turk:

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Here’s how things look up the hill heading southbound – no problems here:

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But this is what you see going north, you see a red light on the left and green light on the right, and the farther away you are, the more it looks like one intersection with contradictory signals:

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I’ve never seen anything like this anywhere in the world.

This is appallingly poor design, IMO.

So, what, give you more money and you’ll put in another pole, SFMTA? IDK, you can see that they spent money on three new poles, so why did they cheap out with this half-assed creation?

Tree branches? So, the SFMTADPW wants to cut down hundreds of “diseased” trees** on this 3000-foot stretch of Masonic, but it can’t trim a couple trees in the name of Safety?

OK fine.

ASSIGNMENT DESK: Why did the deciders decide on this half-assed design? This one will write itself.

*Are there any low injury corridors in San Francisco? No there are not. So the phrase “high-injury corridor,” as used over and over again, recently, in SF, is meaningless. Oh what’s that, there are no accidents on Willard Street North, for example. Except that WSN aint a corridor, it’s a just a little street. So “high injury corridor” simply means corridor, which simply means, of course, “a (generally linear) tract of land in which at least one main line for some mode of transport has been built.”

**This is how SFGov works:

I wanted the trees gone, but knew I’d face stiff resistance both from homeless advocates and tree supporters. We brought in a tree expert and wouldn’t you know it, some of the trees had a blight. I issued an emergency order, and that night park workers moved in and dug up and bagged the trees. By the time the TV cameras arrived the next morning the trees were on their way to a tree hospital, never to return.”

Arguably, this occurred a while ago, but, arguably, Willie Brown is still the Mayor, so there you go.

A New Way to Hide Cell Phone Towers: Check Out How They’re Doing It at 590 Van Ness near Golden Gate

Thursday, March 26th, 2015

Oh, come on, man!

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What are people supposed to think these things are?

I cry foul.

Twitterloin Update: Adieu Big Boy Market – More Uncritical Source Greasing from CW Nevius – La Muerte del Niño Grande

Tuesday, March 10th, 2015

Here’s a statement about the northern Twitterloin from CW Nevius inTenderloin nonprofits vs. bad apple corner stores:

“He hired a security guard and installed lights and cameras, but he and the people at the neighborhood’s other service agencies know where the real problems originate — the handful of lawless corner stores.

So, the “real problems” of the Tenderloin originate from a handful of lawless corner stores?

Uh, nope!

The test will be when the handful of corner stores get shut down and then the New Day doesn’t dawn, of course.

(One supposes that Nevius needs to “add drama” in order to justify his high-salary, low-effort gig.)

Now obvs, if SFGov is sufficiently motivated, it can “dramatically” change the character of a high-crime corner or a block pretty much at will. (Like at Jones and Market, the former open-air, stolen iPhone Apple store in front of the check-cashing place. Post an officer not just for one shift, but for all shifts and then people will get the message to move on.) But I’m skeptical of SFGov doing much more than that, of it “bringing a new day” to the TL. I heard the same type of thing when I lived in the area, back before Nevius white-flighted to The Creek in the East Bay, and periodically I keep hearing the same-old-same-old from some of the bad apple service agencies that Nevius is in communication with. (You know, like the one with the chief exec who sometimes threatens to sue and almost always belittles The Neviusese’s employer, for instance.)

Naive newcomer Nevius is far more optimistic than I on this score.

In any event, if SFGov can shut down an individual store and CW Nevius wants to cheerlead from his empty nest condo in SoSoMA, that’s fine. But it’ll be a long wait for a “new day” in the TL.

Oh well.

Background: The Big Boy Market at 180 Golden Gate is no more as of 2014.

And here’s a shot I took, from 2011 – it seemed to piss off the people hanging about. (Everything’s filtered ‘cept for the DRUG-FREE SCHOOL ZONE (or should it have been SCHOOL-FREE DRUG ZONE?) sign:

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Hey Nevius, why don’t you spend a Night in the Twitterloin ala this guy? You know, have a hat cam on, or have a drone hovering overhead to record your interactions. Or, just keep on doing the same old, waiting for Randy Shaw to email you with his latest Crusade, that kind of thing. I suppose you get paid the same either way…

‘Til next time, Niño Grande.

The death of a giant baby
Well, it happens a lot ’round here
And if you think peace is a common goal
That goes to show how little you know
The death of a giant baby
Well, I’d rather not get involved
I never talk to my neighbor
I’d rather not get involved
Love, peace and harmony?
Love, peace and harmony?
Oh, very nice, very nice, very nice, very nice
But maybe in the next world