Posts Tagged ‘guard’

Regatta de Blanc: White People + Annual THREE BRIDGE FIASCO = ??? (Also, MOTHERBOY is a Real Thing)

Thursday, February 1st, 2018

(Not to be confused with Reggatta de Blanc, back when Sting did “White Reggae,” and that was the way we liked it!)

No, this was the annual Singlehanded Sailing Society’s Three Bridge Fiasco, which certainly lived up to its name in 2018.

Of course, things started out OK last Sunday. (Can you see the building on the highest point of South East Farallon?)

7J7C7005 copy

But then, look at this:

7J7C6936 copy

It was a total FIRE SALE what needed attention from the Coasties:

7J7C6920 copy

And then I was like, “Please don’t let this be white people, please don’t let this be white people,” and well, you know:

7J7C6951 copy

So you had vessels going backwards under the bridge, going out with the tide. NTTAWWT, but I’m sure our local Bar Pilots aboard massive container ships Straight Outta Pusan didn’t appreciate all this foofarah.

Now look, it’s a tow, from MATER, get it? It’s Sir Tow Mater, KBE?

7J7C6932 copy

Aint never seen this –  a sailboat towing a sailboat:

7J7C6933 copy

Now this guy got all upset after I started giving him the business with my DJI Mavic Pro Quadcopter Plus II, you know, for like five minutes – geez what a sore loser!

7J7C6934 copy

No no, actually, the shot above is yet another one from the Golden Gate Bridge sidewalk and actually, dude looked totally competent, why not.

And these ppl too, they did fine – I guess they just got caught up with the TBF:

7J7C6938 copy

But here’s how things ended, for some:

7J7C6939 copy

7J7C7000 copy

7J7C6927 copy

7J7C6931 copy


Oh well.

Anyway, here at the racing results for 2018, with just a 1% completion rate.

Oh, and fans of Arrested Development will be gratified to learn that MOTHERBOY is a real thing, at least it is at the St. Francis Yacht Club. See?


(I came across this when I was trying to find out about the recent fiasco. You’re welcome.)

In closing, you beat me to the punch, yes, it was a “fiasco.” But I am therefore disarmed, if this affair was basically what was intended. And, unlike the America’s Cup, it didn’t cost John and Joan Q Taxpayer eight(!) figures in subsidy. So carry on, Fiascoers, but let’s be careful out there…

Armed Patrol on Battery on an Electric Standup Tricycle

Tuesday, December 20th, 2016

I’ve never seen this:


Note handgun:


“T3 Motion” Electric Standup Vehicle from Challenge Security.

They’re hiring, but you need your own gun.


How to Safely Make Your Way About Our Troubled Twitterloin: Getting Towed by a Pit Bill

Friday, May 20th, 2016

7J7C6151 copy

This Infamous Mall in Bucolic Placer County, CA is on the Front Lines of Terrorism, Apparently – “IF YOU SEE SOMETHING, SAY SOMETHING”

Thursday, January 21st, 2016

I don’t know, man:

IMG_9482 copy

And yes, that’s a real security guard, locked and loaded for bear.

And when I say infamous, I mean this flash mob thing from aught-ten.

And, oh yes, no photos allowed, of course.

I just don’t know, man…

The Wells Fargo Bank Branch on Haight, Where You and Your Bike are Always Welcome

Wednesday, December 30th, 2015

They’ll even open the door for you…

7J7C1624 copy

Nothing Escapes the Gaze of this University of California Police Force Security Officer

Thursday, January 1st, 2015

Absolutely nothing.

This one’s from the vault, from 2009. But it remains an arresting sight.

(Would you think this woman is a police officer or not? Look closely. I guessed the wrong way.)

As seen in Mission Bay. Click to expand:

IMG_6571 copy

Remember the 1980’s?

retro_mix_40_2007-pet-shop-boys-suburbia copy

I do.

Uh Oh: Many Many Outside Lands 2014 Tickets from Scalpers are Turning Out to be Fake – Here’s What They Look Like

Friday, August 8th, 2014

Like all these tickets are fake, per the SFPD:

Click to expand

So if you try to use your fake ticket at the box office it won’t work, sorry.

Here’s a close-up from from Cornell Banard:

How can you tell a fake from a real ticket? I don’t think you can.

Many many fakes are out there:

@KimKardashian I got sold a fake ticket to outside lands fest to see Kanye!! Can you help me????

What White People Don’t Like:

Waiting around by boxoffice watching all manner of teary-eyed white 20-somethings stomp away screaming on phones abt fake tix

What can be done?

Don’t buy tickets from scalpers. Judging by the amount of tears at the entry gate, they are almost all fake. Duh.

So, choose wisely.

(You can always try to go over or under The Wire, but that kind of thing probably won’t work.)

San Francisco’s Only Real “Gated Community” is Presidio Terrace – The Gates are Always Open But There’s a Guard to Keep You Out

Friday, July 11th, 2014


But dividing the cost of a security guard among 20-something families is prolly pretty expensive, so at other times there’s only an empty SUV posted as sentry.

Click to expand

And best of all, the place is Caucasians-only, sort of:

In a small brochure, Object Lessons in Homebuilding, developers Baldwin and Howell promoted racial covenants as part of a set of deed covenants attached to a model planned gated suburb, Presidio Terrace. Deed covenants were used to ensure protection from the nuisances of uncontrolled growth following the 1906 earthquake and to create a community of “Caucasians” only in Presidio Terrace. Among such progressive urban design amenities as underground utilities, asphalt roads for automobiles, and private picturesque streets, racial covenants guaranteed racial homogeneity as an integral part of desirable suburban housing. Baldwin and Howell marketed Presidio Terrace lots by focusing comparatively on the settlement of Japanese immigrants in the Western Addition district of San Francisco as undesirable and blighted by racial pathologies.”

The Most Ignored Person in the World Has Got To Be This “Pedestrian Monitor” for the Central Subway Boondoggle

Friday, March 29th, 2013

This is the scene down at 4th and Market, where the Big Dig West Coast Central Subway project is, well, digging big these days.

San Francisco’s horrible pedestrians want to get across the northern side of the intersection and it’s this person’s job to stop them from doing so.

It’s not working. Check it out sometime.

But don’t laugh at sad sack Charlie Brown here – the Theory of Prevailing Wages ensures that he makes more moolah than you:

Click to expand

In closing, San Francisco pedestrians are the worst in the world just saying.

Shirtless Shoplifter at Western Addition Lucky Supermarket is Looking for Witnesses of Pepper Spraying – Excessive Force?

Thursday, May 17th, 2012

The Great Lucky of NoPA probably gets more than its fair share of shoplifters, for whatever reason.

Anyway, here’s the latest, a flyer posted from, one supposes, a lawyer.

Read it if you want – click to expand:

Learn to love me 
Assemble the ways 
Now, today, tomorrow and always 
My only weakness is a listed crime 
My only weakness is … well, never mind, never mind

Oh, shoplifters of the world
Unite and take over 
Shoplifters of the world 
Hand it over 
Hand it over 
Hand it over