Posts Tagged ‘illegal’

How to Live Rent-Free in San Francisco: Get an RV and Then Park It In Front of a Church (and Not a House)

Friday, June 19th, 2015

‘Cause if you sleep in your RV in front of a house, its millionaire homeowners will, hackles raised, not rest until you are gone gone gone.

But churches are a different story – you’re less likely to have to deal with complaints to the SFPD / SFMTA. (You might trigger an internal debate about why-do-we-even-have-this-congregation-in-the-first-place, you very well might do that.)

Simply, church-goers are much, much less likely to call out the popo on you.

As here:

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I’ll tell you, the same RVs I saw ten years ago parked on Post and Geary and Fell and Oak at night are now, after recently being chased away by new legislation, parked on Masonic and Presidio and Hayes, as here.

On It Goes…

The Horrible Pedestrians of San Francisco, Chapter CXII: Special Richmond District Edition – The Right Way and the Wrong Way to Jaywalk

Wednesday, June 17th, 2015

This person never looked. This person shouldn’t be jaywalking:

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But bygones, moving on, ever so slowly moving on…

…to this. Starting across Geary with a cane, waaaaaay too late:

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Assuming you start when it’s legal, then tout le monde need to wait for you. But if you start too late then you’re just another jaywalker.

I start late, sometimes. But I pay attention.

That’s the difference.

If You Have a Motorcycle (or Something Smaller Like a Moped), Feel Free to Travel Through the Golden Gate Park Panhandle

Tuesday, June 16th, 2015

You know, the way everybody else does.

As here, on the “300 block” of Ashbury, or what would be 300 block but for the Golden Gate Park Panhandle being there. But no matter, just wait for the light and then head north or south on the walking paths:

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This will save you all kinds of time going from Fell to Oak or Oak to Fell.

This didn’t used to be a thing, but now it’s a thing, especially at night…

Official UBER Log-In Photo Depicts Illegal Driving on Music Concourse Drive in Golden Gate Park

Friday, June 12th, 2015

You know, just saying.

What’s this, a Photoshopped California Academy of Sciences being used on an Uber website? I think so.

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Well, the car’s pointing in the wrong direction, that’s all.

Hey, does the our California Academy of Sciences or Recreation and Park Department get any Uber money for helping fill out Uber.com with commercial photography?

You know, just asking.

If now you’re yearning for a little color after deconstructing this desaturated image, check out the grand opening of Color of Life this weekend:

“There’s more to color than meets the eye. This summer, the California Academy of Sciences will unveil Color of Life, a major new exhibit that explores the connection between charismatic colors and their starring role in the natural world. Celebrate the opening of this exhibit with fun programs and performances all weekend.

Program Partners include EnChroma, Inc., Conservatory of Flowers, California Wolf Center, Little Artistas, Bryson Voirin, California Academy of Sciences Exhibit Studio (Saturday only), and California Academy of Sciences Department of Botany (Sunday only).

Activities will take place in the Piazza from 10AM to 4PM on Saturday, June 13 and Sunday, June 14.”

Slacklining Hippies Use Bud Light Suitcase Cardboard to Protect Tree in Golden Gate Park

Wednesday, June 10th, 2015

Sort of.

The cardboard looks a little low to me:

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Is this a good thing or a bad thing? IDK

Is this a legal thing or an illegal thing? IDK.

Le mise-en-scene:

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Not Complaining, Just Explaining: See How a Jogger Handles the Revised Intersection of OAK and MASONIC

Friday, June 5th, 2015

What you’ll see isn’t the world-famous Golden Gate Park Panhandle Bike Path – that’s on the north side, the Fell Street side. What you’ll see is the south side, the bike-free path near Oak.

Brocephus on the left here is jogging east and he’s way late – he missed his chance to enter the crosswalk on his green. OTOH, the taxi can enter the intersection.

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No matter, here’s the jogger going more south than east, “jogging” around a Prius:

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Hey, are you allowed to run into a crosswalk in CA? Uh, not really. And hey, isn’t this crosswalk excessively wide? Uh, yes it is.

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By this time, the left turn arrow phase started and the jogger exited the intersection. A happy ending, I suppose.

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This intersection now has three signal phases, for better or worse – people are still getting used to it.

The fundamental problem here has been that traffic backs up on the left side of Oak due to all the people who want to go north on Masonic -it’s kind of a bottleneck so that’s why we got the new left turn arrows.

If this jogger had been hit by a vehicle, the SFPD would have found him at fault, the same way it found the majority (50-something percent) of pedestrians at fault for their deaths last year, calendar 2014.

]If you say, well any struck pedestrian was “in the crosswalk,” well that’s pretty much useless as you’re not giving enough information to determine fault and, in fact, a pedestrian can be outside of a crosswalk, let’s say just outside, you know, close enough, and still be held not at fault for a collision, in California anyway. (This isn’t really a written-down law, it’s more of a case of judges following how other judges have ruled in the past.)

OTOH, you can be in the absolute middle of a crosswalk, as Brocephus was,  and be held at fault for your death / injury.

It all depends…

The Pigeon Feeders of 6th Avenue – As If These Critters Don’t Have Enough Food Already

Thursday, June 4th, 2015

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Double Double Parking: How Much of Bush Street Should We Illegally Dedicate to Illegal Parking Every Weekend?

Thursday, June 4th, 2015

This church feels its entitled to park in the left lane of Bush every Saturday, but now it wants the middle lane as well?

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San Francisco could stop this if it wanted to, but it doesn’t want to. This behavior from SFGov violates our Establishment clause, does it not?

The Drone Bros of Golden Gate Park: Whose Drone is Hovering Three Feet from Your Bathroom Window on Fell Street? This Dude’s

Tuesday, May 26th, 2015

Here’s the scene without any arrows pointing things out:

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And here are the arrows:

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And here are the bros:

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Now it could be that bro was just checking out his own pad using his new toy, but man, some people might have been surprised if they saw this drone hovering just outside their windows.

The drone slowly increased altitude to rooftop level and I didn’t stick around to see where it went next.

This is How We Live in 2015…

Our Inefficient, Money-Hungry SFMTA Wants to Start Issuing Speeding Tickets, But Somehow “They Would Not Be Moving Violations?!”

Thursday, May 21st, 2015

Oh, this one’s easy  – we’re going to go from zero to Orwellian in ten seconds.

Gentlemen, Start Your Engines:

SFMTA Pushing For Speed Cameras In San Francisco To Improve Pedestrian Safety by Cate Cauguiran

And here’s your nut graf:

“SFMTA plans to present their proposal to the San Francisco County Transportation Authority later this week. The agency says the citations would not be moving violations, and therefore not reportable to the DMV.”

Now let’s review – Papa Homer, what’s a “moving violation?

A moving violation is a violation of the law committed by the driver of a vehicle while it is in motion. The term “motion” distinguishes it from other motor vehicle violations, such as paperwork violations (which include violations involving automobile insurance, registration and inspection), parking violations, or equipment violations.”

So, if the parking ticket agency gives a ticket for speeding, it’s issuing moving violations, right? Now tell us more, Wiki:

While some violations, like parking violations, are civil matters involving a vehicle’s owner, moving violations are charged against the actual driver.

Yep. And then there’s this:

The most commonly enforced moving violation, and the overwhelmingly most frequent reason for a vehicle pullover, are violations of the speed limit.

And what’s the motivation for the SFMTA to float this balloon?

Sometimes tickets are used in a speed trap as a form of fundraising

I don’t use the term “speed trap” myself, but, yes, our SFMTA is obsessed with “fundraising,” certainly.

And lastly:

Examples of moving violations: speeding, which can be exceeding a limit or simply driving an unsafe speed…

Thanks Wiki! And actually, a speeding ticket is the prototypical moving violation, in Frisco and everywhere else too.

Now I’ll tell you, I was surprised earlier this year to see the SFMTA issuing “block the box” tickets, because sometimes the SFMTA DPT shows up at an intersection during rush hour to unblock the box, not to make money from block boxing. And yet, here you go:

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This is a DPT PCO in the middle of the intersection of Bush and Sansome shooting fish in a barrel – busting three vehicles, and then she was Gone In 60 Seconds.

And I thought, well, I suppose the drivers here are parked since they’re idling away, motionless, for a long time, so sure, ticket away, SFMTA, even though you’ve timed the lights to exacerbate this situation, but anyway, sure, these are parking tickets, fine.

But if you want to start issuing moving violation tickets, you shouldn’t lie about it. (I’ll tell you, sometimes I can’t tell if the SFMTA lies on purpose or if it just doesn’t know what it’s doing.)

Now, here’s my MODEST PROPOSAL - traffic cameras for pedestrians, mounted over crosswalks. The cameras would record all the peds who jump the light by starting across a second or two early and then a ticket for $100 would get mailed to the offenders after facial recognition ID’s the peds. (Gentle Reader, did you know that most ped deaths last year on the Streets of San Francisco were the fault of the peds themselves? It’s sort of a secret. It wasn’t a blowout or anything, the peds “won” this competition by 50-something percent, vs. the drivers’ 40-something percent, but isn’t it ironic, dont’cha think, that enforcing the vehicle code upon peds, as unpopular as this might be, could reduce traffic deaths more than how SFGov has handled matters up ’til now? Anyway, I’m talking about how the SFPD apportioned ped deaths in SF in 2014. But don’t talk about it, oh no – that might get you transferred to the Airport Detail, srsly. And bonus! Our new ped cams could “also help us as an investigative tool if someone is committing a crime somewhere nearby.” Moving on…)

Of course, the reason why SFGov wants to go Full Orwell is that paying sworn officers to issue tickets is inefficient and expensive. OTOH, an automatic system, backed up by an appeals mechanism to make everything constitutional, could generate tons of money for the SFMTA, like almost as much as its Household Transit Tax fantasy that it would impose on you, Gentle Reader, in a New York minute, if it could. (It’s what Ed Reiskin dreams of at night – your transit tax would be added to your tax returns, easy peasy, what a dream!)

Anyway, I think saying that a moving violation isn’t is worthy of five Orwells, on a scale of zero to five Orwells:

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All the way to the bottom, Maggie SFMTA – you’ve made it!