Posts Tagged ‘in’

To Entrap a Local Predator: Electricity Parasite, Caught in the Act

Monday, February 24th, 2014

There, but for extremely cheap and powerful backup OEM batteries from the Amazon, go I:

Click to expand

If You Try to “Opt Out” of Useless Telephone Book Delivery, the Horrible YP Yellow Pages People Will Hound You

Wednesday, January 9th, 2013

In perpetuity.

Check it:

“A valid telephone number is required in order to process and verify opt-out requests. Incorrect or omitted information may prevent us from honoring your request.”

Why do they say they need your phone number? So they can ask you if you really, really think phonebooks are so useless these days that you don’t want them anymore.

And then, they’ll call you the next year and the next year and the next year. You know, to make sure. Again.

Forever.

So. which is worse? Would you rather get a useless phone book or a useless phone call?

Weeks after delivery, these books are still around:

Via Warzau Wynn – click to expand

YP Yellow Pages Local Search people, nobody in San Francisco wants what you’re selling.

Why don’t you go away?

Oh No, Once Again Telephone Book Season Comes to San Francisco! Dinosaur Industry Just Won’t Stop

Tuesday, October 23rd, 2012

I’m at a loss.

But I’ll tell you, if I see one of these paper monsters with “AT&T” on the cover, I’m going to deliver it back to the nearest AT&T store.*

Here’s what San Francisco telephone books look like before they get rained on: 

Via Warzau Wynn – click to expand

In closing, see you in Hell, telephone book industry!

*Unless you all “opt out” first! HAHAHAHA.

The Yellow Pages Opt-Out Program Simply Doesn’t Work – San Francisco Man Shows How Opt-In is Better than Opt-Out

Tuesday, December 6th, 2011

San Francisco resident Jon Sieker has a beef with AT&T.

See?

“You accidentally gave me a White and Yellow pages this year after I signed up to not receive either of them”

Here’s the proof:

Click to expand – via Jon Sieker

And here’s the note he just sent to Ma Bell, cause you see, Jon has Internet access:

“Dear AT&T,

2 years ago I was so disappointed by the waste that the Yellow and White pages caused, caring about my community and environment, I searched online for what I could do to minimize the waste. I was very happy to find your web site that allowed me to opt out and not receive a White Pages and Yellow pages to save on the waste. Thank you for providing this option as I have The Internet and don’t need a physical phone directory. The Internet gives me all of the information I need including your yellow pages site. I felt great to find and fill out the form that allowed me to NOT RECEIVE both yellow and white pages. I felt I was doing something to save the environment. Imagine my surprise when I was accidentally given both the yellow pages and white pages today.

Please let me know what I should do with the unwanted publications. It would be best if you came and picked them up from me and passed them on to some unfortunate soul with no internet.

As a side not, it would be great if your delivery agents didn’t litter my street and community with these unwanted relics from the past. I have photos of the litter if you are interested or don’t believe me. I would be happy to pass these photos on to you or any of the other organizations copied on this email.

Thank you for your help. I look forward to the solution you provide.”

O.K. then.

Now, do you think that the National Opt Out Program would work any better?

I don’t.

Simply, nobody in San Francisco wants telephone books anymore.

So, telephone book industry, why not just tell your Santas to pass over the 415 when you send them out delivering across America this holiday season?

Just asking…

Unwanted, Unsolicited Copies of “The Ed Lee Story” Litter Our Streets – Who Opted In? – If We Can Ban Phone Books…

Sunday, October 23rd, 2011

[UPDATE: Looks like the opt-in theory is dead, as Jesse Mullan of Fine Internets reports that The Ed Lee Story: An Unexpected Mayor was actually delivered to candidate Dennis Herrera's house. How wude!]

Now of course there’s a First Amendment issue about telephone book companies being banned from delivering useless telephone books willy-nilly to the residents of San Francisco, but that’s not stopping us from trying to stop delivery of useless telephone books.

So if we are banning unwanted telephone books, why do we allow copies of the laughable Ed Lee Story: An Unelected Mayor to be strewn about the Avenues?

Thusly.

Here’s the sitch as it is right now in the Richmond: 

Click to expand

Oh here’s another a few houses over – Ed’s waiting for you to come home!

The copies I saw strewn about are just like the books what come around every so often, pretty much. I mean, these aren’t campaign fliers, they’re full-on paperback books with 132 pages each.

Anyway, each Ed Lee for Mayor book had a Post-It Note what said, “Hope you enjoy the book. Vote ED! :) ad naseum, all in identical girlish handwriting.

(So that’s what those high school students are being “organized” to do for $11 per hour? O.K. fine, but can you imagine the typical high school student writing thousands of Post It Notes to support the conservative, pro-business candidate?)

You’ll find a slightly different message on the copies that are showing up in the “Free, Take One” remainder bins across town –  ”We love you,” they say.

It’s safe at this point to mention that the printer made too many copies, I think, that somebody overestimated demand for this tome.

If only there were a place we could send all these unwanted books.

Mmmmmm….

I wonder if they’re recyclable?

Oh well…

Dear Telephone Book Industry: Nobody in San Francisco Wants Your Product – Opt In Beats Opt Out

Friday, September 2nd, 2011

Uh, telephone book industry, what you don’t seem to realize is that the vast majority of your “customers” in the 415 don’t want your product.

That’s why when you deliver them, they end up hanging around exactly where you left them for days or weeks…

…or months. See?

The only people who like telephone books in the bay area are the people who make (not very much) money delivering them:

Now, telephone book industry, wouldn’t you prefer it if your customers actually wanted your product? That’s how opt-in works.

I know you all talk about  opt-out, but what I don’t think you all realize is that most of the books you deliver go into the recycling without ever being opened. (This might not be applicable in Omaha, Neb., but it’s certainly true in the 415.)

And I know the bidnesses what advertise in your books are reassured by all the hullabaloo of delivery, but you’d be better off just delivering your product directly to recycling bins and, letting your true customers just dig them out, you know, if they want.

All right, see you Hell, dinosaur telephone book industry!

Telephone Book Industry Group Changes Name: From “Yellow Pages Assn.” to “Local Search Assn.” – Heh

Thursday, September 1st, 2011

Now whatever you do, never “opt out” of useless telephone book delivery. (“It’s a trap!”)

‘Cause that’s just what they want you to do. (Just like ShoppyBag, that scam, which wants you to “opt out” – it wants you to do anything with it except ignore it, which is what everybody should do and then the scam would simply go away. )

No no, just wait for Nature to take its course, just wait for San Francisco’s “opt-in” law to take effect. Easy peasy.

Now check it, Rachel Gordon’s bit today shows us the new name of the phone book industry’s horrible, wasteful, useless, trade group. See? It’s now called the “LOCALSEARCH ASSOCIATION.”

Isn’t that cute? This lobbying group thinks its Google!

(You know, back in the day the buggy whip industry should have changed its product’s name to “horse throttle,” right? The better to compete with the nascent vehicular competition…)

That’s it, keep on making us laugh, Yellow Pages Association.

Outside Lands Music and Arts Festival Off to a Lackluster Start: New Fencing, More Cops

Friday, August 12th, 2011

[UPDATE: Akit, who's in a position to know is saying that the #5 Fulton is an A-OK way to get out to 30th and Fulton from San Francisco right now, Saturday afternoon. FYI]

Oh, it’s illegal to sneak into Outside Lands 2011? That’s what they’re saying. Wow.

So choose wisely:

Think I’m gna drop a stamp and sneak into outside lands to catch phish. Wussap?”

Bouts to sneak the fuck into outside lands tomorrow cuz I like my music fests like I like my country: free and full of illegals.”

I wanna sneak in to outside lands on sunday…must brainstorm/think of something really sneaky”

Anyway, the “horse nazis” from Alpha and Omega are back, the SFPD is all over the place, and the perimeter fencing has been pushed out to cover an unprecedented area.

So maybe you’re best off trying to bum a ticket, as these poor souls were trying to do:

Click to expand

Expect larger crowds later in the day:

What are the security guards on horses supposed to do – intimerdate people? O.K. How helpful were the horses in this particular case from an earlier event? Not very.

The new security setup allows the SFPD to go out riding fences with ease this year:

The good entrances are 33rd and Lincoln in the Sunset on the south side and 30th and Fulton in the Richmond on the north side.

But Fell and Stanyan, what some people consider the “entrance” to GGP, is far, far away from where you want to be. You gotta realize you are seeing a concert that’s way out in the West Bay.

And people, don’t take the 5 Fulton from San Francisco to get there. C’mon! Use your noodle. Try the #38 Geary or the #31 Balboa and then hoof it south at 30th, if you want.

Enjoy the show.

It’ll Cost You $200 Minimum to See the Outside Lands Music Festival, Or You Can Sneak In – Here’s How

Tuesday, August 9th, 2011

All right, at this late date the only way you ticketless souls are going to get into the somewhat mismanaged Outside Lands Music and Arts Festival is to fork over $185 (plus TicketMonster fees) minimum OR to try to sneak in.

Now lots of people have a friend on the inside, so those peeps can just walk through the gates, but you, well, you’re going to have to deal with that eight-foot cyclone fencing.

You’re going to have to go under, over, or through the wire.

Here’s UNDER. See how that works? Easy peasy.

Well there’s the problem: No bottom tension wire on the chain link fence + Line posts too far apart = Jailbreak:

Click to expand

And here’s OVER. This here is called the bum rush:

See how that works right here. Oh, and later in the video, you can see one version of THROUGH.

Remember, this is one of those victimless crimes. (Its like punching someone in the dark.)

But if you feel guilty for not paying your fair share, well then you can throw a five-spot into a Recreation and Park donation box sometime – they have them at Strybing Arboretum, for example.

All right, be warned that the 2008 OL was The Best Ever. Remember picking up those nine Euros stranded by MUNI on McAllister and taking them along for the ride on your way home in the Land Cruiser? Good times. Oh, wait a sec, that’s my memory. But remember Radiohead and the sound system trouble? Oh, you weren’t there? Well that was The Best Ever. Nothing can compare with 2008.

Anyway, maybe the Outside Lands should be free for those 21 and younger, something like that?

Here’s the lineup for 2011:

MusePhishArcade FireThe Black KeysDeadmau5The ShinsMGMTGirl TalkThe DecemberistsJohn FogertyErykah BaduThe Original MetersBeirutThe RootsArctic MonkeysBig Audio DynamiteSTS9Warren Haynes BandBig BoiMajor LazerLittle DragonJulieta VenegasSiaOK GOThe Greyboy AllstarsJosh Ritter & The Royal City BandOld 97′sMavis Staples!!!Latryx feat. Lyrics Born and LateefBest CoastCollie BuddzPhantogramCharles BradleyFoster the PeopleLotusSTRFKRJunipPajama ClubThe Infamous StringdustersThe VaccinesToro Y MoiVetiver (band)The LimousinesThe Stone FoxesThe Joy FormidableMacklemore and Ryan Lewis, Wye OakAna TijouxOrgoneLord HuronTamarynGrouploveThe Fresh and OnlysXimena Sarinana,Ty SegallSunbirdsNicki Bluhm & The GramblersDiego’s UmbrellaGhost RobotPaper Diamond 

Or just buy some three-day (that’s all that’s left for GA ticks)  or single-day “VIP” tickets, I don’t care.

Anyway, enjoy the show!

“GENERAL ADMISSION & VIP TICKETS

Eager Beaver 3-Day Ticket – $149.50 (Sold Out – Thank You)
Special 3-Day Ticket – $175.00 (Sold Out – Thank You)
Advance 3-Day Ticket – $185.00 (Sold Out – Thank You)

Regular 3-Day Ticket – $199.50 (Still Available!)
VIP 3-Day Ticket – $450.00 (Still Available!)

Single Day Friday GA Ticket – $85.00 (Sold Out – Thank You)
Single Day Friday VIP Ticket – $185.00 (Still Available!)

Single Day Saturday Ticket – $85.00 (Sold Out – Thank You)
Single Day Saturday VIP Ticket – $185.00 (Still Available!)

Single Day Sunday Ticket – $85.00 (Sold Out – Thank You)
Single Day Sunday VIP Ticket – $185.00 (Still Available!)

VIP tickets Include the following:
- Exclusive Polo Club w/ shade, lounge seating, activities and massage services
- Viewing Areas at the Lands End and Twin Peaks stages
- Special restroom facilities
- Access to special VIP food concessions
- Access to beer, wine and spirits services
- Commemorative Poster and more!

ESURANCE SHUTTLE PASS
3-Day Shuttle Pass – $29.50 ($4.90 per trip)

PARKING
3-Day Parking Pass – $140.00 (Sold Out – Thank You!)

*Based on availability

**All tickets are subject to applicable service charges and fees

“Green” your ticket! When you buy your tickets, you’ll be given the option of donating $1 per day to offset the festival’s carbon emissions including your travel.

All Tickets are also available service charge free at The Fox Theater’s Box Office (1807 Telegraph Avenue, Oakland, CA 94612 - located on the 19th street side of the theater) on show nights and on Fridays from noon – 7:00pm.

GA Tickets are also available at The Independent’s Box Office (628 Divisadero Street, San Francisco, CA 94117) for $205.

Tomorrow’s News Today: Chrysler is Giving 14 Monster Trucks to San Francisco – That Thing Got a Hemi?

Monday, August 1st, 2011

As a matter of fact, yes, the 14 plug-in hybrid electric vehicles (PHEV’s) what Chrysler Group LLC is going to give to the City and County of San Francisco tomorrow all have Hemi engines, monstrous V8, 5.7-litre Hemis, to be precise.

But, these big rigs also have an extra battery and electric motor for hybrid functionality PLUS members of the “City Family” will be able to plug in to the power grid to charge up the battery as well.

It’s going to look a little something like this, garish graphics and all:

Click to expand

Now, if City workers are really careful, they’ll probably be able to go 15 miles about town solely on electric power, assuming that the battery is all charged up at the beginning of the day.

But what San Francisco probably really wants is an electric truck without a gas engine at all. Oh well. (It’s the same way with Mayor Ed Lee’s official staff car – why have them put the gas engine in at all if you don’t want it and you aren’t going to use it?)

BTW, Chrysler was a-gonna to build plug-in hybrid pick-em-ups like these in mass production for people living in Flyover Country, but then Big C realized that a project like this would lose money. Big Money. The More You Build, The More You Lose, kind of thing. Well, that idea got the kibosh.

But then the Feds said, well, here’s a few tens of millions of dollars we’ve got sitting around, so why don’t you take that money to build just 140 units instead, and then give these trucks away to America’s mayors?

And, since San Francisco is special, so very special, we’re getting 10% of the national supply.

Hurray?

“Who:
Edwin M. Lee, San Francisco Mayor
Abdullah Bazzi, Senior Manager – Chrysler Advanced Hybrid Vehicle Project, Chrysler Group LLC
Joe Roos, Assistant Vehicle Chief Engineer – Chrysler PHEV, Chrysler Group LLC
Steve Sokolsky, Calstart

Where:
Civic Center Plaza
San Francisco

Details:
Following the press conference, Ram 1500 Plug-in Hybrid Electric Vehicles will be available for photo opportunities and a ride-and-drive around a city driving course. Media parking available in parking structure just off the Civic Center plaza.”

UPDATE: Well, it turns out that Sacramento is going to get 14 big rigs as well, so maybe we’re not all that special. In mitigation, Los Angeles and Fun Diego and the rest of SoCal, they’re getting nothing! Zero free trucks from Chrysler and Uncle Sucker. Eat it, L.A!

Ever more deets, after the jump.

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