Posts Tagged ‘italy’

News Flash for Willie Brown: SF WAS NOT IS NOT AND WILL NEVER BE the Sister City of Paris – The Real Sister is Rome, Italy

Wednesday, December 3rd, 2014

Here’s Willie Brown (Mayor of San Francisco, 1996 to Present) going on about:

…our sister city Paris…

The problem with that is that Paris only has one (1) sister city and it’s not San Francisco.

It’s Rome.

They even have a saying about this:

Only Paris is worthy of Rome; only Rome is worthy of Paris.

Seule Paris est digne de Rome; seule Rome est digne de Paris

Solo Parigi è degna di Roma; solo Roma è degna di Parigi.

Ergo, San Francisco is not “worthy” of being the Sister City of either Paris or Rome.

Sorry, Mayor Brown.

The fact is that Paris is in an exclusive sister-city relationship. It’s an “elaborate cultural partnership,” as they say.

Now, here’s our real relationship with The City of Light. We’ve signed a few of these things:

“Pacts of friendship and cooperation signed by the City of Paris.”

Les pactes d’amitié et de coopération signés par la Ville de Paris

Which, IRL, is rien de bien grave* (no biggee).

All right, TTFN. But remember:

We’ll Always Never Have Paris.

*Paris, France is pals with just about everybody:

2014: Rome 
2014: Seoul 
2014: Mexico 
2013: Montevideo 
2013: Amsterdam 
2011: Yerevan 
2011: Dakar
2011: Sao Paulo, signed an amendment to the Cooperation Agreement of 2004 
2011: Yerevan 
2011: Rio de Janeiro 
2011: Ramallah, signed a pact of friendship and cooperation inauguration, the Garden of Nations, a bust by French sculptor Emile-Antoine Bourdelle (1861-1929), including Ramallah to Paris 
2010: Doha 
2010: Tel Aviv-Jaffa 
2009: Istanbul 
2009: Quebec 
2009: San Francisco  
2009: Rio de Janeiro 
2009: Quebec 
2009: Jericho 
2009: Istanbul  
2007: Phnom Penh 
2006: Montreal  
2006: Cairo  
2006: Beirut  
2005: Copenhagen  
2004: Tunis  
2004: Sao Paulo 
2004: Rabat  
2004: Casablanca 
2003 St. Petersburg 
2003: Quebec 
2003: Algiers 
2002: Geneva 
2001: Porto Alegre (joint statement) 
2001: London 
2000: Madrid 
2000: Athens 
2000 (updated in 2004): Washington 
1999: Warsaw 
1999: OVA (Arab Towns Organization) 
1999: Mexico 
1999: Buenos Aires 
1999: Amman 
1998: Sydney 
1998: Sofia 
1998: Lisbon 
1998: Yerevan 
1997: Tbilisi 
1997, Santiago  
1997: St. Petersburg 
1997: Riyadh  
1997: Prague 
1997: Beijing 
1996: San Francisco 
1996: Quebec 
1996: Chicago 
1995: Jakarta 
1993: Beirut 
1992: Moscow 
1991: Seoul 
1987: Sanaa  
1987: Berlin 
1987: Amman 
1985: Cairo 
1982: Tokyo 
1958: Kyoto 
1956: Rome (Twin Exclusive)

Dennis Herrera Throws Down: Tells “Monkey Parking” to Drop Mobile App for Auctioning City Parking Spots – $300 Fines?

Monday, June 23rd, 2014

[UPDATE: SFist (lots of comments already), Slate, and the San Francisco Chronicle are on the case.]

Gotta say I sort of saw this one coming.

And it’s not just Monkey Parking that’s in trouble today. Check out the craigslist ad from ParkModo (cached website) (@ParkModo – no Tweets yet, or maybe they were deleted?), posted on June 17th, 2014:

Earn $13.00 P/H Just To Park! (mission district)

Our company is launching an awesome app that rewards people to sell their on-street parking spots before leaving to people who need a spot.

To help us promote the app, we are looking for 20 people with cars and iPhones to park around the mission and use the app to offer their parking spots to people looking for parking.

The hours will be from 5:30-9:00 pm Thurs-Sat starting June 26th.

This is how it works:

1. You download the app from the app store.
2. When you want to work, you will contact our field manager to check in.
3. The field manager will then instruct you as to what area and type of spot you are to park in.
4. You will then find a spot in the area and park.
5. Once you are parked, using the app, you will offer the spot for sale. 
6. While you are waiting for someone to purchase the space, you will distribute postcards and promote the app.
7. Once someone purchases the spot, you will complete the transaction with the buyer and then find another space to park in and start the process all over again!

If you are interested, please click on the link below (Paste into your browser) and provide your information so we can contact you and get you started.

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1To5Ck5FrPBMrh35SvJp-WDRg0WDyaLLyuo1_MS8pyV8/viewform?usp=send_form

We look forward to working with you!”

I think ParkModo’s operations will now be on hold, for a little bit at least. But do you want some more from them? See below.

Now, all the deets about all these troubled businesses, from Herrera’s office:

“Herrera tells Monkey Parking to drop mobile app for auctioning city parking spots

Motorists face $300 fines for each violation under existing law, City Attorney says — and three startups could be liable for penalties of up to $2,500 for each transaction

SAN FRANCISCO (June 23, 2014) — San Francisco City Attorney Dennis Herrera today issued an immediate cease-and-desist demand to Monkey Parking, a mobile peer-to-peer bidding app that enables motorists to auction off the public parking spaces their vehicles occupy to nearby drivers.   The app, currently available for iOS devices, describes itself on the Apple iTunes App Store as the “the first app which lets you make money every time that you are about to leave your on-street parking spot.”

The letter Herrera’s office issued this morning to Paolo Dobrowolny, CEO of the Rome, Italy-based tech startup, cites a key provision of San Francisco’s Police Code that specifically prohibits individuals and companies from buying, selling or leasing public on-street parking.  Police Code section 63(c) further provides that scofflaws — including drivers who “enter into a lease, rental agreement or contract of any kind” for public parking spots — face administrative penalties of up to $300 for each violation.  Because Monkey Parking’s business model is wholly premised on illegal transactions, the letter contends that the company would be subject to civil penalties of up to $2,500 per violation under California’s tough Unfair Competition Law were the city to sue.  Such a lawsuit would be imminent, Herrera’s office vowed, should the startup continue to operate in San Francisco past July 11, 2014.

Technology has given rise to many laudable innovations in how we live and work — and Monkey Parking is not one of them,” Herrera said.  “It’s illegal, it puts drivers on the hook for $300 fines, and it creates a predatory private market for public parking spaces that San Franciscans will not tolerate.  Worst of all, it encourages drivers to use their mobile devices unsafely — to engage in online bidding wars while driving.  People are free to rent out their own private driveways and garage spaces should they choose to do so.  But we will not abide businesses that hold hostage on-street public parking spots for their own private profit.”

Herrera’s cease-and-desist demand to Monkey Parking includes a request to the legal department of Apple Inc., which is copied on the letter, asking that the Cupertino, Calif.-based technology giant immediately remove the mobile application from its App Store for violating several of the company’s own guidelines.  Apple App Store Review Guidelines provide that “Apps must comply with all legal requirements in any location where they are made available to users” and that “Apps whose use may result in physical harm may be rejected.”

Two other startups that similarly violate local and state law with mobile app-enabled schemes intended to illegally monetize public parking spaces in San Francisco will also face legal action in the form of cease-and-desist demands this week, according to the City Attorney’s Office.  Sweetch charges a $5 flat fee when its users obtain a parking spot from another Sweetch motorist.  Sweetch drivers who pass their spots off to other Sweetch members are refunded $4 of that fee.  ParkModo, which appears poised to launch later this week, according to recent employment postings on Craigslist, will employ drivers at a rate of $13.00 per hour to occupy public parking spaces in the Mission District.  As with Monkey Parking and Sweetch, ParkModo then plans to sell the on-street parking spots to its paying members through its iPhone app.  Sweetch and ParkModo members who make use of the apps to park in San Francisco are also subject to civil penalties of $300 per violation, and both companies are potentially liable for civil penalties of $2,500 per transaction for illegal business practices under the Cali04fornia Unfair Competition Law.

A copy of Herrera’s demand letter to Monkey Parking and additional information about the San Francisco City Attorney’s Office is available at: http://www.sfcityattorney.org/.”

And here’s a little more from ParkModo:

“We are currently rolling out the beta in the following cities…

San Francisco – As beautiful as city it is, parking is just as bad! Not only is there way to much demand for the supply, but the parking police will catch you if they can! Be among the first 1000 people to download the app and get $5 in free parking!

New York – Instead of calling it the city that never sleeps, they should call it the city that never has parking! Get in on ParkModo and earn some serious cash and stop wasting your time. We know every minute in ny is precious.

Chicago – There may be wind here, but there is certainly no parking! Use ParkModo and fly like the wind when you need a space!”

City Hall Goes Red and Green in a Different Way – To Honor Mexico? Italy? Ireland? Ron Conway? Baby Jesus?

Thursday, December 13th, 2012

First City Hall was all like this.

Like a week ago:

But now it’s all like this:

See the diff?

Doesn’t it look something like the flags of Mexico, Italy and/or Ireland?

Speaking of Ireland, hated Republican billionaire Ron Conway can trace some of his roots back there, right? So maybe he called up weak-willed* Interim Mayor Ed Lee with some lighting ideas.

It’s not impossible.

Like remember when Republican billionaire Ron Conway got caught trying to improperly influence SFGov over the issue of street parking spaces near the offices of Pinterest? And then he lied about it?

And these days he “declines to state” whether he’s a Republican or not?

You know, if I were straight white male Republican billionaire who was willing to spend millions to buy political influence to make San Francisco more Republican I’d be all, “Gosh darn it, I’m a straight white male Republican billionaire who is willing to spend millions to buy political influence to make San Francisco more Republican!”

You know, direct, instead of, I don’t know, weaselly.

Oh, this just in, here’s a vote for Italy.

*“We talked in your office a couple of weeks before you entered the race and you confided in me that you didn’t want to run, but that Rose Pak and Willie Brown were putting a lot of pressure on you to run and you didn’t know if you had the strength to resist them.

San Francisco is Italian Car Paradise: Alfa and Lambo

Monday, December 10th, 2012

See?

Click to expand

 

Hey, is San Francisco Really a “Sister City” of Paris, France? No – Was It Before? No, Not At All – Here’s Why

Wednesday, September 26th, 2012

Here’s why:

Seule Paris est digne de Rome; seule Rome est digne de Paris. 

Solo Parigi è degna di Roma; solo Roma è degna di Parigi.

Only Paris is worthy of Rome; only Rome is worthy of Paris.

That means that Paris has been “twinned” with Rome in an exclusive sister-city relationship. It’s an “elaborate cultural partnership,” as they say.

So does that mean that Mayor Ed Lie will be lying once again today?

Yep, pretty much.

But you’ve got to realize that things are more or less on autopilot at City Hall these days, so it’s not really his volition.

(And if Willie Brown could get away with something, then Ed Lee should be able to as well, else it’s racist or something.)

Now, here’s what we really have with the City of Light. We have one of these things:

Les pactes d’amitié et de coopération signés par la Ville de Paris

Which in American is “pacts of friendship and cooperation signed by the City of Paris.”

Which, IRL, is rien de bien grave (no biggee). See Below.

IMO, we should be like Dubai, which ID’s itself as a Partner City with Paris.

All right, TTFN. But remember, We’ll Always Never Have Paris.

IRL, Paris, France is friends with just about everybody. The list of partner cities:

2012: San Francisco
2011: Dakar 
2011: Sao Paulo, signed an amendment to the Cooperation Agreement of 2004 
2011: Yerevan 
2011: Rio de Janeiro 
2011: Ramallah, signed a pact of friendship and cooperation inauguration, the Garden of Nations, a bust by French sculptor Emile-Antoine Bourdelle (1861-1929), including Ramallah to Paris 
2010: Doha 
2010: Tel Aviv-Jaffa 
2009: Istanbul 
2009: Quebec 
2009: San Francisco  
2009: Rio de Janeiro 
2009: Quebec 
2009: Jericho 
2009: Istanbul  
2007: Phnom Penh 
2006: Montreal  
2006: Cairo  
2006: Beirut  
2005: Copenhagen  
2004: Tunis  
2004: Sao Paulo 
2004: Rabat  
2004: Casablanca 
2003 St. Petersburg 
2003: Quebec 
2003: Algiers 
2002: Geneva 
2001: Porto Alegre (joint statement) 
2001: London 
2000: Madrid 
2000: Athens 
2000 (updated in 2004): Washington 
1999: Warsaw 
1999: OVA (Arab Towns Organization) 
1999: Mexico 
1999: Buenos Aires 
1999: Amman 
1998: Sydney 
1998: Sofia 
1998: Lisbon 
1998: Yerevan 
1997: Tbilisi 
1997, Santiago  
1997: St. Petersburg 
1997: Riyadh  
1997: Prague 
1997: Beijing 
1996: San Francisco 
1996: Quebec 
1996: Chicago 
1995: Jakarta 
1993: Beirut 
1992: Moscow 
1991: Seoul 
1987: Sanaa  
1987: Berlin 
1987: Amman 
1985: Cairo 
1982: Tokyo 
1958: Kyoto 
1956: Rome (Twin Exclusive)

And in other news, George P. Shultz was a Nixon and Reagan appointee, not a Carter appointee. (You’d be amazed how many people think (or say) he’s a Carter appointee.)

Anywho, ever more deets, including a visit to Le Twitter HQ in the corrupt Twitterloin:

“From September 25 to 28, the mayor of Paris, Bertrand Delanoë, is visiting San Francisco to strengthen ties and cooperation between the two cities.

The mayor of Paris has a full agenda for his stay in California. After a welcome reception at the Consulate of France in San Francisco, he visited two companies Parisoma and Twitter. 27 in the morning, he will go to Parisoma a common workspace, exchange and support for entrepreneurs. Created by the French Stéphane Distinguin, Parisoma accompanied nearly 300 start-up since its inception in 2007.

Bertrand Delanoë must also discover the new headquarters of Twitter in the SoMa district, the famous social network of micro-blogging, along with its CEO Jack Dorsey. With New York, Paris is the city with the most subscribers to his Twitter account, and this year the City of Light became the first in the world to exhibit his tweets in the public space, the place Châtelet.

Paris delegation has always aimed to encourage more trade with San Francisco, mainly on economic and technological. Several meetings with the mayor of this city, Edwin Lee, are well planned and Bertrand Delanoë is expected to sign a memorandum with him, in line with those of 2006 and 2009 to facilitate cooperation. This will be an opportunity to discuss joint projects twinned towns and to consider connections between the research teams.”

 

The Somewhat-Racist Italian Flag Light-Pole Stickers of North Beach and What One Chinese Dude Did About Them Ten Years Ago

Wednesday, May 23rd, 2012

One thing that me and our local real estate cabal agree upon is the sanctity of Broadway as a neighborhood dividing line on the east si-iiiide of San Francisco.

So I’ll admit that any area above B’Way isn’t a part of Chinatown. Fine.

But, you know, Chinese/Asian businesses started a foothold in North Beach proper, above B’Way, back in the day and certain people didn’t like it, not one bit.

So, these Italian light pole flags started going up a few decades ago as a response to the encroachment, the Asian Invasion. Take a look below.

Now I’ll tell you, one person who didn’t cotton to these flags was furniture store owner Ed Yee. You see, he preferred American flags. Read all about his campaign against colori italiani in this bit by Ilene Lelchuk from all the way back in aught-two. Ed’s windmill-tilting even made the Fox News back then.

But, after some blowback from people like Louis Calabro of the “European American Issues Forum” the City Family came down on Ed so his campaign to put up American flags on the Italian poles ended.

Count them, go ahead. These things are all over the place:

Click to expand

Oh well.

Back in the 1800′s, people in North Beach would throw rocks at Chinese and Chinese Americans who ventured north of Broadway. You know, to send a message about who belongs where.

These days, we “defend” the Italian-ness, the whiteness of North Beach in a different way.

O.K. fine.

But I don’t approve.

We ought to take all these stickers down.

In closing:

“It’s a visual and therefore a visceral betrayal. Stop it!”

John Malkovich, Transformers III: Dark of the Moon

OMG OMG! The Sainted Wall Street Journal is Covering the America’s Cup Already! Read and Learn from Sarah Tilton

Wednesday, April 25th, 2012

LEAVE US BEGIN, LET’S HEAR FROM THE WALL STREET JOURNAL ONLINE!

“SAN FRANCISCO—As this city gears up for the 34th America’s Cup next year, a race of a different kind has already begun: one to snag the best views of the sailing regatta.”

UH, REALLY? NO, I DON’T THINK SO. ISN’T THE “RACE OF A DIFFERENT KIND” INVOLVING THE AMERICA’S CUP ACTUALLY THE RACE FOR TEAMS, YOU KNOW, FROM SPAIN AND ITALY AND FRANCE, TO GET OUT OF COMMITMENTS TO PARTICIPATE IN THE AMERICA’S CUP? YES. TEAMS BE REFUSING TO ENTER EVEN AT THE HIGHLY REDUCED 80-SOMETHING PERCENT OFF ENTRY FEE. HAVEN’T YOU HEARD YET, SARAH? THE NEWFANGLED BOATS ARE TOO BIG. AND DO YOU KNOW WHO SAYS THAT? LARRY FUCKING ELLISON HISSELF, RECENTLY, IN THE ONLINE PAGES OF, WAIT FOR IT, THE WSJ ITSELF.* DON’T YOU READ YOUR OWN PUBLICATION? DON’T YOU KNOW THAT AC34 IS SHAPING UP TO BE A KIND OF SLOW-MOTION DISASTER?

Peter Jacobsen, a semiretired dentist from Yountville, Calif., isn’t taking any chances when it comes to ensuring a view of the America’s Cup racecourse on San Francisco Bay. Dr. Jacobsen and his wife, Gwendolyn, last year paid $158,000 for a fractional interest in a one-bedroom unit at a ritzy condo development right by San Francisco’s waterfront.

IRL, NOBODY CARES ABOUT RETIRED NORTH BAY DENTISTS ET UXESES EXCEPT NORTH BAY DENTISTS. AND WHAT’S A FRACTIONAL INTEREST IRL? ISN’T THAT JUST A TIME-SHARE?

The deal guarantees just 35 nights a year at the property—but importantly, a Bay-view unit for two weeks during the America’s Cup finals scheduled for September 2013.

FASCINATING! OH, BUT NOBODY CARES ABOUT THE AMERICA’S CUP, RIGHT? THEY JUST HAD A WARM-UP RACE DOWN IN FUN DIEGO – IT WAS A BIG DISASTER BECAUSE NOBODY CARED. AC PEOPLE GOT FIRED OVER THAT ONE. AND LAID-OFF TOO. MOST OF THEM, ACTUALLY. HAVEN’T YOU HEARD? OH, AND SARAH, “A BAY-VIEW UNIT” MEANS SOMETHING DIFFERENT IN THE 415, YOU KNOW, COMPARED WITH WHAT IT MEANS IN OTHER PARTS OF THE WORLD.

The Jacobsens shelled out the six-figure sum even though they already own another fractional interest at the property that they bought for $182,000 in 2009. But that unit doesn’t have a guaranteed view, and with the regatta approaching, “we needed more time and it was an opportunity to lock in the perfect view,” says Dr. Jacobsen, 67 years old.

YEAH, “YOU GOT TO LOCK THAT DOWN!” SO, OLD WHITE PEOPLE ARE GOING TO SIT IN THEIR APARTMENTS AND WATCH THE BOAT RACE FROM MILES AWAY? REALLY? IS THAT WORTH SPENDING YOUR KIDS’ INHERITANCES?

More than a year before the event, sailing fans are scouting out prime vistas for the America’s Cup. The chase for best perch has inspired a real-estate scramble, with some agents setting up shop specifically to locate rooms with a view for elite clients.

WELL, CERTAIN REAL ESTATE AGENTS WOULD LIKE US TO BELIEVE THAT THERE’S A “CHASE” AND A “SCRAMBLE.” THESE HOUSING PARASITES LIE TO REPORTERS LIKE YOU TO TRY TO MAKE MORE MONEY ON DEALS. DON’T YOU KNOW THAT?  AND YOU SAY REAL ESTATE AGENTS HAVE OPENED UP OFFICES JUST FOR THE AC? I DON’T BELIEVE THAT BUT WHATEVER. AND OH, RETIRED NORTH BAY DENTISTS ET UXES AREN’T “ELITE” ANYTHING.

Rental prices for the America’s Cup are already soaring.

OMG OMG OMG! ALREADY? ALMOST AS IF THE AC ISN’T A BIG DISASTER. ALREADY.

Landlords are dangling options such as a $60,000-a-month rent for a home in the posh Pacific Heights neighborhood during the race. Although results remain to be seen, agents say prices could go as high as $100,000 a week during the finals.

RESULTS REMAIN TO BE SEEN? REALLY? MORE THAN A YEAR OUT? WOW, THANKS FOR THAT TIDBIT, SARAH TILTON! WHAT DO YOU WITH YOUR LIFE WHEN YOU’RE NOT SHILLING FOR REAL ESTATE INTERESTS?

“It will be a real land-grab for the good stuff,” says Rick Teed of Sotheby’s International Realty.

RICK TEED? YOU MEAN THIS UBER-CHEESY ASSHOLE RECENTLY SEEN ON THE BACKS OF MUNI BUSES?

Click to expand

I THINK YOU DO!

The anticipated demand for a race view stems partly from the relative rarity of the America’s Cup taking place in America. The race hasn’t been held in the U.S. since 1995, and in recent years has taken place off the coast of New Zealand and Spain. (The race was named by the New York Yacht Club after the schooner America, which beat the British in a race in 1851.)

WOW THANKS FOR THE HISTORY LESSON, SARAH. BUT MOST OF THAT HERITAGE RECENTLY GOT FLUSHED DOWN THE TOILET BY ONE LARRY ELLISON. HEY SARAH, WHY DON’T YOU READ THE COMMENTS PEOPLE HAVE POSTED ‘NEATH YOUR ROSY ARTICLE? WHY DO THEY HAVE A MORE REALISTIC PERSPECTIVE THAN YOU?

The Cup has never been held in San Francisco Bay, which race officials describe as a “natural amphitheater”—as opposed to the open ocean where the regatta usually takes place. That means some prime views of the event can be had from land this time rather than from the decks of spectator boats.

BUT, NOBODY CARES ABOUT THE AMERICA’S CUP ANYMORE. SEE? THAT’S THE PROBLEM.

The race is coming to San Francisco through the efforts of Oracle Corp. ORCL +0.24% founder and chief executive Larry Ellison, whose yacht and sailing team won the 2010 America’s Cup in Valencia, Spain. The winner of the race, which is typically held every three to four years, decides where the next competition will take place. The billionaire also owns a home in San Francisco with first-class views of the Bay.

BUT, NOBODY CARES ABOUT THE AMERICA’S CUP ANYMORE. SEE? THAT’S THE PROBLEM.

But Mr. Ellison may have an even better seat than that for the regatta. An America’s Cup spokeswoman says Mr. Ellison will be on board Oracle Racing’s boat during the races. Through a representative, Mr. Ellison, 67, declined to comment.

BUT, NOBODY CARES ABOUT THE AMERICA’S CUP ANYMORE. SEE? THAT’S THE PROBLEM.

The Cup itself, a sterling silver trophy that gets its own seat on airplanes, comes in a custom Louis Vuitton case and always travels with a companion, the Cup spokeswoman says. It is kept in a secret location when not on tour, she says, but will be displayed during the race in San Francisco.

BUT, NOBODY CARES ABOUT THE AMERICA’S CUP ANYMORE. SEE? THAT’S THE PROBLEM.

The heady rental numbers are spurring some homeowners to try renting their home for the first time. Marjorie and Larry Schlenoff listed their 3,162-square-foot four-bedroom San Francisco home, which they have lived in since 1999, for $35,000 a month for a long-term lease encompassing the Cup period. For shorter stays around the time of the Cup, the price is higher: $15,000 a week, says Mrs. Schlenoff.

MORE DETAILS! WE DEMAND MORE DETAILS. IS SHE GOING TO SAY, “ASK ME ABOUT MY GRANDCHILDREN” NEXT?

“We’ve never rented our house,” says Mrs. Schlenoff, a psychoanalyst and nonprofit founder. But with the home’s vistas and location near San Francisco’s Golden Gate Yacht Club, she says she and her husband see the regatta as a unique opportunity and the house as a “business asset.”

HOLD ON, I’M GETTING SO EXCITED FROM THIS NEWS NUGGET THAT I’M HAVING A MILD HEART ATTACK. HOLD ON WHILE I GO TO THE ER.

She listed her home through rental agency ReLISTO, which has multiple homes available for the Cup, including a $3,500-a-month studio with no views to $60,000 a month for a 5,000-square-foot Pacific Heights house with panoramic Bay views.

WHEW, THAT WAS A CLOSE ONE. I’M MEDICATED NOW AND MY DOCTOR SAYS THAT I SHOULD STOP READING THE FUCKING ONLINE WSJ BECAUSE I GET TOO EXCITED. BUT I GOTS TO HAVE MORE DETAILS!

Charlie Martin, a real-estate agent in Sausalito, Calif., launched a group called RezLux in February specializing in Cup rentals. In addition to real-estate needs, he says he will also provide personal chefs and concierge services for the race. So far, he has handled calls from potential clients in England, Japan and New Zealand. “We’re starting to book,” he says.

OMG, MORE WHITE PEOPLE! THE AMERICAS CUP IS FILLED TO THE BRIM WITH WHITE PEOPLE! HURRAY! HURRAY FOR WHITE PEOPLE!

Some homeowners say there is no way they will rent their home during the Cup because they want the panoramas for themselves. Venture capitalist and America’s Cup Organizing Committee member Tom Perkins, who owns a 60th-floor penthouse in San Francisco, will be watching the Cup from there.

HE’S WHITE TOO, RIGHT? WHITE PEOPLE, WHITE PEOPLE, WHITE PEOPLE, WHITE PEOPLE! BUT AT LEAST HE’S NOT OLD, RIGHT?

“It’ll be just about the best place to watch,” says Mr. Perkins, 80, adding that he plans to have “lots and lots of people over.” Mr. Perkins, who once owned one of the world’s most expensive yachts, dubbed the Maltese Falcon, says he has several pairs of binoculars and a World War II telescope ready for the festivities.

OH, HE IS OLD AFTER ALL. ACTUALLY OLDER THAN HIS “World War II telescope,” WHATEVER THE HELL THAT IS.

Others are plotting a cheaper course to view the regatta. Sean Randolph, president of the Bay Area Council Economic Institute, says he plans to watch the Cup from a kayak in a buffer zone that will be created on San Francisco Bay for nonmotorized boats. While Mr. Randolph’s home in Marin County, north of San Francisco, has a view of the Bay, it doesn’t overlook the Cup’s racecourse, and he doesn’t want to shell out thousands of dollars to rent a property.

OH, DUDE’S FROM THE BAY AREA COUNCIL ECONOMIC INSTITUTE? THAT’S THE SO-CALLED “INDEPENDENT AUTHORITY” WHAT SAID HOW GREAT THE AMERICA’S CUP WAS GOING TO BE. BUT THAT TURNED OUT TO BE A LIE, RIGHT? BUT THAT’S NO REASON TO QUESTION THE ENTIRE PROCESS, IS IT, SARAH?

“In a kayak, you’re sort of participating because you’re on the water and you’re a little closer” to the action than on land, he says.

YES, BEING IN A KAYAK IS SORT OF LIKE PARTICIPATING IN THE AMERICA’S CUP. OF COURSE. SORT OF.

For John Kostecki, a sailor on the Oracle sailing team, the best views of the race are free. In particular, he recommends a stretch of waterfront near the Marina Green, where spectators can get close enough to hear sailors’ conversations. “It’s quite deep and the boats can come quite close,” he says.

OH, ARE WE DONE? IS THAT IT? WE SORT OF TRAILED OFF THERE. WELL, ANYWAY, LET’S PUT THIS ON PAGE A1.

I DON’T KNOW, MAN. IF THE AMERICA’S CUP IS MAKING SO MUCH MONEY FOR SO MANY PEOPLE, WHY ARE THE CITIZENS OF SAN FRANCISCO BEING FORCED TO SUBSIDIZE IT? WHY ARE THE POWERS THAT BE TAKING MONEY FROM NON-MILLIONAIRE NON-WHITE PEOPLE AND USING IT TO PAY FOR THE “FUN” AND “EXCITEMENT” OF MILLIONAIRE WHITE PEOPLE? THE CROWD AND REVENUE ESTIMATES ARE STILL WAY, WAY, WAY OPTIMISTIC AND THEY’RE BASED ON HAVING A BUNCH OF TEAMS SPENDING A BUNCH OF MONEY IN TOWN ONE TO TWO YEARS OUT. IN ACTUALITY, THE BOATS ARE WAY TOO BIG FOR THE BAY AND WAY TOO BIG FOR POTENTIAL TEAMS.

THIS THING IS GOING TO END UP BEING LIKE A FLEET WEEK, EXCEPT THE US NAVY DOESN’T THINK IT’S REASONABLE TO DEMAND NINE-FIGURES TO PROMOTE ITSELF.

BUT IT’S NOT TOO LATE FOR DEADBEAT LARRY ELLISON TO STEP UP AND SIMPLY PAY US FOR THE RIGHT TO RUN HIS BOAT RACE HERE.

IT’S NOT TOO LATE, LARRY! AND THEN YOU CAN TURN YOUR BUMMER OF A RACE INTO AN ACTUAL REBUILDING YEAR AND THEN YOU CAN LOOK FORWARD TO 2016 AND, THEREBY, HAVE SOME MORE FUN BEFORE YOU DIE (OF THAT DISEASE WHAT YOU HAVE WHAT’S A SECRET). OTHERWISE, THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO’LL BENEFIT FROM YOUR FALSE GENEROSITY WILL BE REAL ESTATE TYPES AND LAZY, SIMPLE-MINDED, CHEERLEADING, WSJ-ONLINE REPORTER TYPES…

*“I think it’s a really good idea to get the cost of fielding a team way down so you can have a lot more countries [and athletes] participating,” Ellison said.

The Unbearable Lightness of Being CW Nevius: Chronicle Writer Changes His Position on the America’s Cup Once Again

Thursday, February 9th, 2012

Let’s see here, remember back when when it took three months for San Francisco Chronicle writer CW Nevius to pull a 180 on the original America’s Cup deal? Leave us review:

CW Nevius, the bleating sheep of San Francisco’s Animal Farm, seems to have had a change of heart about Larry Ellison’s one and only offer for us to pay for his little boat party in a few years.

You see, back in the day, a way back in September 2010, Chuckles thought the idea of San Francisco losing nine figures for the right to host the next America’s Cup, the concept called the “Southern Waterfront” proposal, was:

“…a wonderful opportunity without a downside.”

But now, less than three months later, the very same exact proposal has become:

“…an irresponsible giveaway and bad for San Francisco.”

Remember that? (You see, at the time The Neve was trying to frame in high relief the differences between two different proposals so that was his technique. Either he’s stupid or he thinks his readers are stupid. Or both.)

Anyway, since then, the AC13 people took Chuckie on a boat ride for him to witness a staged catamaran crash near the Marina so then he became fully “on board” with this venture. Let’s call him cheerleader number one for this aquatic boondoggle.

Here’s his latest position. I don’t know. The Chuckinator is starting to sound conflicted, once again.

Oh, I know, why don’t we just call the whole thing off, why not? It would teach certain people a lesson and we wouldn’t be mortgaging San Francisco’s future to Larry fucking Ellison. Sounds like a win-win to me.

And hey, do you think that CW benefits personally from SF hosting the America’s Cup? I think he does, just as he’s personally benefited from eight(!) Olympiads.

Here we go:

“I would just add this. I covered eight Olympic Games. In nearly every case, there were huge problems with the host cities – bitter feelings, angry denunciations and threats of revenge. But on the day of the Opening Ceremony, all was forgiven.”

Really, all was forgiven? Really? Aren’t the people of Greece, for example, still suffering from the effects of the 1996 Olympics? I think so. Don’t you know that Chuckles?

The Olympics are corruption, simply stated. And America’s Cup is corruption. Same deal.

But at least people actually seem to be interested in the Olympics.

Oh well.

“The animals who inhabit the Manor Farm are mistreated and abused. The animals rebel and take over. Soon, however, the pigs (who represent the party bosses) begin to take special privileges for themselves, e.g. extra food. They enlist the farm’s dogs as enforcers to put down any dissent, and they teach the sheep to speak the party line on demand. At first, this is, “Four legs good, two legs bad”- animals (four legs) are good, humans (exploiters) are bad. As time passes, the Seven Commandments (Animal Farm’s Constitution) undergo subtle changes as the pigs rewrite it to suit their own agenda. When Boxer the horse (symbolizing blue-collar labor, the “workers,”) becomes too old to work, the pigs sell him to the horse butcher, whom they tell the other animals is really the veterinarian. The pigs eventually learn to walk on two legs, thus imitating the animals’ original exploiters, and they teach the sheep to bleat, “Four legs good, two legs better!”

“Me Dancing” by Principal Dancer Maria Kochetkova – Plus, International Auditions for Ballet School Summer Session 2012

Monday, November 14th, 2011

World-famous ballerina Maria Kochetkova is down in Mexico City these days, but she’ll be back to our world-class San Francisco Ballet for the 2012 Season soon enough.

This one is simply entitled, “Me Dancing.”

Via balletrusse

Hey, speaking of ballet, here’s a recent announcement about why you always see gaggles of ballet students congregating around Civic Center every summer:

SAN FRANCISCO BALLET SCHOOL ANNOUNCES - NATIONAL AND INTERNATIONAL AUDITION TOURS

SAN FRANCISCO –San Francisco Ballet School, the official school of San Francisco Ballet, has announced the schedule for its first-ever International Audition Tour. The School has also announced the dates for its 2012 National Audition Tour. Over the course of three months, hundreds of teenage girls and boys from across Europe and the U.S. will audition for an invitation to attend one of two Summer Sessions offered by San Francisco Ballet School. These include Program 1, a three-week program for intermediate students, and Program 2, a four-week program designed for advanced and pre-professional students. Program 1 will be held this summer from June 11–29; Program 2 will be held July 9–August 3.

The 2012 International Audition Tour is scheduled to visit 4 European cities: London; Madrid; Marseille, France and Florence, Italy. These auditions will be held for advanced and pre-professional students, only.

The 2012 National Audition Tour is scheduled to visit 11 U.S. cities: Boca Raton, FL; Boston; Chicago; Dallas/Ft. Worth; Irvine, CA; New York; San Francisco; Santa Monica, CA; Seattle; Washington, D.C. and Winston-Salem, NC.

“There are many talented young dancers throughout Europe who are well-suited to participate in our training programs,” said Lola de Avila, associate director of the San Francisco Ballet School. “For the first time ever, San Francisco Ballet School is thrilled to hold international auditions, offering prospective students the chance to receive the highest-caliber training.”

Nearly 1,500 intermediate and advanced-level students are expected to audition on the tour, vying for approximately 125 positions for each of the School’s Summer Session programs. The Summer Sessions will include intensive classes in classical ballet technique, pointe work, batterie, dance history, repertoire, character, and Pilates. Students must attend a Summer Session in order to be considered for admittance to the School’s regular school year program.

About San Francisco Ballet School
San Francisco Ballet School, the country’s oldest classical academy, is directed by San Francisco Ballet Artistic Director and Choreographer Helgi Tomasson and Associate Director Lola de Avila. Now, over 75 years after its founding, the School boasts a distinguished international staff, a Trainee Program for advanced-level students, a dedicated student residence, and an extensive scholarship program. San Francisco Ballet School attracts students from around the world, training approximately 350 annually. In addition to filling the ranks of San Francisco Ballet, graduates have gone on to join distinguished ballet companies throughout the world.

For more information on San Francisco Ballet School’s Summer Sessions, visit: www.sfballet.org/school/summer_session.

San Francisco Film Society Presents the 2011 New Italian Cinema Festival – Nov 13-20 at Embarcadero Ctr. Cinema

Saturday, November 12th, 2011

It’s back! It’s New Italian Cinema from the SFFS.

See?

Image

“November 13–20, 2011
Landmark’s Embarcadero Center Cinema

Celebrating 15 years in San Francisco, New Italian Cinema 2011 offers Opening and Closing Night presentations with work by prominent Italian directors. A three-film tribute to Daniele Luchetti will open the Festival, followed by seven features by up-and-coming directors in the City of Florence competition. The films in this year’s program investigate topics including corporate malfeasance, office politics, rural life and war, as experienced by Italians from every walk of life. Closing Night offers the latest by one of Italy’s most respected filmmakers, Nanni Moretti’s Habemus Papam. A festive Closing Night reception at a nearby restaurantwill finish out the festival.

Download the program (PDF)
New Italian Cinema Sponsors & Supporters

The SFFS has tons of stuff like this going on all the time, year in and year out. Check it:

Anyway, here are two of the Italian films they have coming up and the rest you can see after the jump.

Ci vediamo al teatro! Perche no?

A Quiet Life

Claudio Cupellini
Buried secrets and a criminal past lead the proprietor of a swank hotel in Germany to desperate acts in this powerful drama from the director of Lessons in Chocolate (NIC 2008). When Diego and Eduardo, two young hotheads visiting from Italy on shady business, arrive at Rosario’s establishment, it is soon evident that they want more from him than just a place to lie low. The motivations behind their visit become increasingly fraught on all sides until the hotelier is forced to protect the new life he’s built—at all costs.  Read more…

Sunday, November 13, 1:00 pm; Friday, November 18, 6:30 pm 

Landmark’s Embarcadero Center Cinemas

The First Assignment

Giorgia Cecere
In 1950s Puglia, headstrong young Nena is sent to a mountain village many miles away for her first teacher placement. Unhappily leaving her wealthy boyfriend behind, she faces a scruffy set of undereducated pupils and a group of locals suspicious of outsiders. With a style that tells the story visually rather than verbally, this is a moving portrait of an independent woman attempting to overcome the restrictions places against her.  Read more…

Sunday November 13, 3:45 pm; Saturday November 19, 6:30 pm 

Landmark’s Embarcadero Center Cinemas