Posts Tagged ‘lane’

Guess Where I Ride on Fulton Outbound: To the Left of the Bike Lane, In It, or To the RIght?

Thursday, January 9th, 2014

Here we go, in the Western Addition, outbound, gently uphill.

Note the black lines indicating where the bike lane lines should be, and where they used to be:

Click to expand

The answer, Gentle Reader, is to the right of the bike lane lines. Which I suppose is in the supposed “door zone.” But I ain’t ever been doored, at least in the conventional* sense, despite the fact that I have much more time on bike in San Francisco than you, yes you, Gentle Reader. I have more time, more miles, more years, more decades on the Streets of San Francisco than you is what I’m saying, sorry.

And I’m leaving plenty of space for others to pass me. So pass me, I don’t care.

New topic: Note the next block, where the SFMTA has decided to allow 90 degree parking to placate the denizens of District 5. I don’t approve of this, for various reasons.

JMO

*Now, I’ve crashed into car doors, sure. Like the time I hit an aging Accord driven by a 16-year-old who thought he could make a turn from McAllister onto Gough at the same time another car was making the same turn. (My left elbow still clicks to this day and it will for the rest of my life oh well.) And I kind of bounced off of a door on McAllister in the PJ’s due to a lady turning into a housing project parking lot from a little bit too far away, IMO, but that was a no harm no foul kind of thing and let’s say that mistakes were made on both sides of that transaction. And I got doored by bouncing off a partially-opened door going uphill on 6th Ave at a very low speed and I’ve gotten doored by passengers getting out of cars on the right side on Market. But I aint ever been doored in the conventional sense.

How a Typical San Francisco Cyclist Bikes His Way Up Fell Street, at Night, Without Lights, “Taking the Lane”

Friday, January 3rd, 2014

[UPDATE: FTR, this part of Fell has four lanes and is timed for about 25 MPH and posted for 30 MPH, IIRC. And I’ll just say I get all this static nowadays due to my (apparently) quite unpopular views on the Chris Bucchere case. (That’s an interesting piece by writer David Darlington, BTW.) I can’t tell if people are being sarcastic or not, so forgive me if I don’t reply anymore.]

[UPDATE II, Electric Boogaloo: So we have this from another out-of-towner: “SF writer objects to bike riders’ right to take the lane.” Well, yeah, the right to take the lane … at a wobbly 10 MPH during the evening rush hour. Dude should pick up the pace, IMO. Dude was riding slowly on purpose, IMO. Now if you want to talk about a “substandard” lane, you want to talk about the brand new, SFMTA-approved southbound stretch of Divisadero betwixt Geary and McAllister. This is quite an uphill stretch, so the universal bromide of “taking the lane” for seven city blocks doesn’t really work. What happens is that cyclists keep to the right and cars and buses sneak around. There used to be more room but the sainted SFMTA decided to put in a big old median. Did the SFMTA intend for cyclists to take the lane? If so, nobody ever does so on this uphill stretch.]

Here we go, heading west on Fell at night:

Click to expand

Now I say “without lights” because dude is indeed without lights, but you can get away with just one light under CA law just saying. Could have said without “a light” instead. Let’s see, what else – oh, jumping the green, thusly:

This is called running a red light:

And this is called “taking the lane.”

Which you shouldn’t do as it’s agin the law when you’re trucking (slightly) uphill on Fell at about 10 MPH.

Oh well.

Keep in mind that you should view the words “reasonably necessary” and “unsafe” OBJECTIVELY and not SUBJECTIVELY. So like, man, I feel safer riding in the middle of the lane at 10 MPH doesn’t cut it. Similarly, it was like necessary man for me to do what I did also doesn’t cut it. I suppose you don’t need a brake on your bike, because, like, “my legs are my brakes, man.” Like, I don’t need to use the safety on my assault rifle because “this [trigger finger] is my safety.” And, legally, man, I’m a citizen of Hawaii and its not “after sunset” in Hawaii right now, man, so you can’t give me a ticket, man. And on and on.

And keep in mind that it’s not the BICYCLISTS ALLOWED USE OF FULL LANE law, it’s the bikes-should-keep-to-the-right-in-at-least-some-situations law.And actually, CVC 21202 takes rights away from cyclists, you dig? That’s why it’s an odd kind of “framing” to celebrate CVC 21202 when it’s CVC 21200 that gives rights to cyclists.

“Operation on Roadway

21202.  (a) Any person operating a bicycle upon a roadway at a speed less than the normal speed of traffic moving in the same direction at that time shall ride as close as practicable to the right-hand curb or edge of the roadway except under any of the following situations:

(1) When overtaking and passing another bicycle or vehicle proceeding in the same direction.(2) When preparing for a left turn at an intersection or into a private road or driveway.(3) When reasonably necessary to avoid conditions (including, but not limited to, fixed or moving objects, vehicles, bicycles, pedestrians, animals, surface hazards, or substandard width lanes) that make it unsafe to continue along the right-hand curb or edge, subject to the provisions of Section 21656. For purposes of this section, a “substandard width lane” is a lane that is too narrow for a bicycle and a vehicle to travel safely side by side within the lane.(4) When approaching a place where a right turn is authorized.(b) Any person operating a bicycle upon a roadway of a highway, which highway carries traffic in one direction only and has two or more marked traffic lanes, may ride as near the left-hand curb or edge of that roadway as practicable.
Amended Sec. 4, Ch. 674, Stats. 1996. Effective January 1, 1997.”

The SFMTA Gods Must Be Crazy – Absurd Painted Lines on JFK Drive Confuse Handicapped Parker

Monday, November 4th, 2013

Let’s see, how can I phrase this? How about:

New JFK bike lanes are bad for everyone

Or this, whichever.

Now, on to new bidness. Check out these handicapped parking spaces on JFK Drive outbound just past the Conservatory of Flowers in Golden Gate Park.

The driver of the car on the right has a valid handicapped placard so she parked her ride right next to the blue-painted curb with her two right wheels well within the 18 inch maximum allowed under the law. Which would be job done in most places in CA. But what grandma doesn’t know is that this stretch of JFK Drive is now Harvard-Boy Ed Reiskin* Crazy Land.

In HBERCL, drivers should park their vehicles 18 feet from the curb, as shown by the jelly bean shaped Lexus** RX on the left.

Click to expand

Does this make any sense?

I’ll tell you, my nana isn’t driving these days owing to her recent stomach surgery, but what would I tell her if she wanted to park her Hyundai in GGP?

I’d tell her, welcome to Harvard-Boy Ed Reiskin Crazy Land. I’m saying that I feel sorry for handicapped drivers who are confused by the one-of-a-kind-in-the-world layout that was just installed to make a political point and to respond to pressure from local political groups. I’m saying that the SFMTA should take account of the users of JFK, you know, grandmothers from Nevada, families from Daly City, you know, the people who are invisible to the SFMTA. I’m saying I feel sorry for this particular*** frustrated grandmother.

Hey SFMTA! Your crazy painted lines are not a “huge success.”

Hey SFMTA! What are you going to do about fixing JFK Drive for its users? Oh nothing, because you think it’s perfect because it was just put in by the SFMTA?

OK fine.

But IRL, what you’ve done is not perfect.

Not perfect at all.

* Hi Ed! Hey, do you know what happened to Jin Lai last month? His guts were squeezed out of his body “like toothpaste coming out of a tube.” A better-run MUNI would have these guards installed 99.something percent of the time, right? And MUNI could be better-run using the same amount of money that we’re giving you now, right? Are you the best person in the world to run MUNI? Obviously, you inherited a bunch of ingrained practices, but you wanted this job, right? You get paid big bucks to do this job, right? What kind of grade would you give yourself on this incident, Ed? If it’s not an “F,” you’re in denial. Deep denial. 

**Grandma’s placard is almost certainly legit. The one on the Lexus has about a 50-50 chance of being legit. If it were a V8 or V12 Mercedes Benz, those odds would go down to about 10%. That’s how it goes with CA’s corrupt free parking handicapped placard honor system.

***She ended up hanging a Louie and motored off, as there were no spaces available at this time.

Cyclists Favor Illegal Bike Racks at the de Young Museum in Golden Gate Park – Legal Racks Unused Sometimes

Tuesday, October 8th, 2013

To wit:

Click to expand

Now I’ll tell you, I tried to park my ride on those sticks in the background but got told that that area needs to be kept clear due to fire regulations or whatnot.

The artistic spiral you see in the foreground is what you’re supposed to use. But as you can see, sometimes people don’t use it at all.

Oh well.

Here’s What’s Wrong with the SFMTA’s Absurd JFK Bike Lanes in Golden Gate Park: #2, Parking Lane Too Small

Tuesday, October 8th, 2013

Now of course the westbound driving lane of JFK Jr. Drive is pretty narrow as well, by design, to make drivers think about maybe not driving into GGP next time.

But anyway, this  here is the parking lane, which drivers don’t understand. They worry about cyclists catching thier driver-side rear view mirrors for one thing. So they sort of ignore the lines.

Now this particular vehicle has an owner with a brand-new ticket for $189 (before fees, oh, the fees), but I think that has to do with leaving it overnight in the park, or parking on JFK during a “Healthy” Sunday, that kind of thing: 

Click to expand

Realize that this absurd lane scheme is a recent idea what sprung from the SFMTA Brain Trust. They think that this is a huge success since some faster cyclists now avoid the area and average speeds have come down a skosh. OK fine. Realize that the SFMTA thinks it’s doing a bang-up job running MUNI.

There will be a quiz. Better bone up now:

Here’s What’s Wrong with the SFMTA’s Absurd JFK Jr Bike Lanes in Golden Gate Park: #1, Tripod Zone, Hummer Limo Zone

Know Your Betters: Area Man Becomes Supraman Simply by Piloting a Tesla Model S Electric Car

Wednesday, July 24th, 2013

You just don’t know how special you are ’til you own and operate a Tesla Model S.

Why, you’re so special that, in some states, you didn’t even have to pay sales tax to get your new ride. And here in California, your wundercar can go all of its 200-something mile range on the freeway in the carpool / HOV lane even though you’re sitting in your car all by your lonesome!

Now check out Dude here on Masonic. He’s got his official CA HOV stickers on all four corners. Plus, he’s also got a license to jibber jabber on his handheld cell phone while driving. I mean, he must – just look at him: 

Click to expand

I didn’t check to see if he has special CHP 11-99 Foundation license plate holders (like this fellow Tesla God), but that would mean that Dude has a license to speed as well.

Oh but Dude, don’t speed too much else the maximum range on your $100,000 car will go down to 100-something miles and then you’ll have to get towed, like this:

(Funny story – in the mind of Tesla CEO Elon Musk, the driver of this car drove it in circles specifically to make it run so low on juice that it wouldn’t go no mo. That wasn’t true but oh well. And this Model S wouldn’t even allow its needlessly-complicated doors to open for the tow-truck monkey, that child of a Lesser God, so it could be, you know, put into neutral so, you know, it could get towed. Oh, and here’s another funny one. How many kids should you have with 30-something Elon Musk before he trades you in for a newer, sexier model-type model? Five[!] Five kids, srsly. And then the former Mrs. Elon Musk is like, “At least she’s not a blonde.”)

Anywho, the question of the day is why you’d even want such a long, low, and wide big-on-the-outside-yet-small-on-the-inside vehicle such as a Model S? It’s like an electrified Porsche Panamera four-door, right? And compared to my full-sized. eight-passenger motherfucking Land Cruiser, the Model S is longer[!] and wider[!] (How can that be?) And I’ll tell you, my ride, which isn’t exactly known for high MPG, no not at all, has a real-life range of 400-something miles on the freeway.

Oh, what’s that, your Model S is shiny and it has a lot of chrome and it makes you feel special? Well, then carry on with your super important phone call, by all means.

You have become a Supraman.

Congrats.

As far back as Yossarian could recall, he explained to Clevinger with a patient smile, somebody was always hatching a plot to kill him. There were people who cared for him and people who didn’t, and those who hated him were out to get him. They hated him because he was Assyrian. But they couldn’t touch him, he told Clevinger, because he had a sound mind in a pure body and was as strong as an ox. They couldn’t touch him because he was Tarzan, Mandrake, Flash Gordon. He was Bill Shakespeare. He was Cain, Ulysses, the Flying Dutchman; he was Lot in Sodom, Deirdre of the Sorrows, Sweeney in the nightingales among trees. He was miracle ingredient Z-247. He was…
Crazy!” Clevinger interrupted, shrieking. “That’s what you are! Crazy!”
“…immense. I’m a real slam-bang, honest-to-goodness, three-fisted humdinger. I’m a bona fide Supraman.”
“Superman?” Clevinger cried. “Superman?”
Supraman,” Yossarian corrected.”

Yossarian is transcendent man. He is rising above the living dead all around him to find a way to live. He is basically alone in his quest. A real hero.”

I am, I am Supraman, and I can do anything.”

Bicycle Spielberg Graces San Francisco – Panhandle Panache – The Fell / Oak Corridor Has Been Captured for the Ages

Wednesday, June 12th, 2013

Ready!

Camera!

Action!

Does Our CHP Have a “Bicycle Officer School?” Yes, Here It Is – Soon to be Patrolling the Eastern Span of the Bay Bridge

Wednesday, June 12th, 2013

Whenever it opens, which will be about a quarter-century late.

Check it:

@CHPoakland officers preparing for Bicycle Officer School and will soon be patrolling the new Bay Bridge! pic.twitter.com/KJ6lk8EqOp

Click to expand

Here’s Why Mercedes Drivers Use the Bus Lane on Montgomery in the Financh – High Reward, Low Risk

Thursday, June 6th, 2013

Let’s take a look up Bush Street from Sansome to see what it’s like during the evening drive.

It can start pretty early – look at the shadows:

Click to expand

It’s not gridlock, but it’s very slow. Drivers make it one or two car lengths per light cycle.

Starting on Bush to get to 1st Street to get to the coveted Bay Bridge on-ramp can take more than a half-hour.

Now what some people in this situation do is say this is ridiculous and then find another way to the bridge. They substitute

Others just stew in their rides – some of these people enjoy honking, you know, as an outlet.

And there’s yet another option.

You can just use the little-used left turn lane after Montgomery and then, and this is key, go straight through the intersection at Sansome to use the BUS TAXI ONLY lane to pass all those su

Thusly:

Now it seems that drivers would get ticketed for this maneuver, but I’ve never seen it happen.

(Cops hate traffic more than you do, so they never hang out here. Come to think of it, I don’t see too many buses or taxis using this special lane either. And I don’t think any forward-facing cameras on any SFMTA vehicle can get you neither)

Of course, then you gotta make it another four arduous blocks to the bridge, oh well.

But otherwise, this is the perfect crime.

Shhhhhh…

Sidewalk Salmoning: Cyclists are Enjoying the New Fell Street Bike Lane Already

Monday, April 22nd, 2013

Look at them all go:

Click to expand

Remember, Cyclists Alway Have the Right Of Way.

Oh wait a second, I just made that up. It’s not correct. I’ll fix my error by telling you I was wrong.

What I meant to say was Pedestrians Always Have the Right Of Way.

Oh wait, that’s wrong as well.

The SFBC knows by now that their statement is wrong but they still have it up on their website?

Yep.

What they should have done is had a lawyer do their bikelaw page.

Oh well.