Posts Tagged ‘marathon’

My Small Beef with Nike’s Very Expensive, Very Stylized San Francisco Photo Shoot from Summer 2014

Friday, October 17th, 2014

Now when I say stylized I mean non-naturalistic, ala Soviet Realism or some old propaganda poster series.

But instead of selling The Revolution, Comrade, we’re selling shoes (and the Nike Lifestyle) to women.

Man, I can just see the crew coming up from Los Angeles* County, scouting out the locations, hiring the fitness models (not just models, fitness models, who don’t look very 415 at all), checking the weather forecast and then heading out all over the City, and then it’s clickety clickety at 11 frames per second on a full-frame SLR camera* (Canon or Nikon, one or the other) after telling the fitness bunnies to hop ever higher, and to pose this way and that way until it’s time for post, when some other crew picks out the “perfect shot” out of thousands and thousands and then we end up with this series of “aspirational” shots.

Who runs like this? Not anyone IRL

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Who runs like this? Not anyone IRL

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I can see Photoshop being pushed to its limits here, not that it’s bad or anything. The model on the right almost looks like a cartoon, almost like a female Jumpman

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Does Nike really “run” SF? Mmmm… I’m thinking these shots are from some other photo shoot. Very stylized, nevertheless:

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Who runs like this? Not anyone IRL

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More of the same

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N’sync! Did somebody have a clapper metronome to keep all the models in sync?

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What’s this?

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Don’t real people look straight ahead or down when they’re jogging? Yep, but not in the Nike Motherland, Comrade. We’re Looking Forward, Towards The Future!

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Very SF, but not a real runner

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Very SF, but not a real runner

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Not SF

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And here we go again, in triangle formation, to fulfill some dude‘s vision

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IDK, perhaps this aspirational fantasyland looks great Down South en LA or Up North in Oregon, but it looks a bit funny, stylized, over the top to somebody from the 415.

Why not use real women from San Francisco next time, Nike?

*One assumes. Prove me wrong!

Nike is Going to Tow Your Car This Saturday Night If You’ve Parked on Certain Blocks of Gough, GG, Webster, Fulton, Scott, Fell…

Friday, October 17th, 2014

I’ve already made this post, but I’ve just come across the route map for 2014′s Nike Women’s Half Marathon, and if this tiny blog can prevent just one unnecessary tow-job this weekend, well that’s blogesse oblige, mon frere.

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If I were Nike, of Beaverton, Oregon, I’d refund the $500-$1000 tow fees that a bunch of San Franciscans are going to be getting come Sunday morning, on a case-by-case basis.

If I were Nike…

All the deets on street closures:

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The Towman Cometh: That AutoReturn Co. Will Make a Ton of Money Tomorrow Night on Fell – Nike Women’s Half-Marathon

Friday, October 17th, 2014

Well, this is new, the routing of this year’s Nike Women’s Half Marathon San Francisco.

Nike, Inc is going to blow through Fell Street like an autumnal version of the Bay to Breakers historic street party and fun run.

Take a look – here are the new signs DPW just put out, like a string of pearls through the Panhandle:

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Note the timing of the mass towings has recently been altered. Can you see the 5 AM hiding under the white sticker what says 11 PM? I’m sure there’s a story behind that.

Anywho, this pop-up event is unexpected so it’s going to catch a lot of people by surprise.

What’s that, “outreach?” Oh yeah, Nike sent out a ton of letters to residents, customized for each mile of the route. I myself got one, but then forgot about it until I saw all these signs.

Nevertheless, even with the letters, this pop-up event is unexpected so it’s going to catch a lot of people by surprise. 

You’ll see.

Checker Marathon and On and On, Western Addition

Wednesday, July 9th, 2014

Like Sting, this long-lasting car was Borne in the 50′s (but actually produced in the 60′s, 70′s, and 80′s).

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Keep on keeping on, Checker Marathon…

Nike Women’s Marathon Media Van #2 Going Waaaaaay Too Fast for the Narrow Streets and Lanes of the Western Addition

Tuesday, October 22nd, 2013

Uh, it’s just the 2013 Nike Half-Marathon, it’s not Armageddon, or even Deep Impact. Where’s the fire, minivan lady? I mean, nobody really cares about the Nike (excepting for the concomitant silver bling from Tiffany’s that Finishers so covet), but people will care if you run over a ped, right?

Also, Nevada plates?

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Now, Oregon plates, you know, from California’s Other Deadbeat Neighbor, from Nike’s Home State, well, I’d almost go for that.

In conclusion, I cry foul.

“We Stand with Boston”

Wednesday, June 26th, 2013

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Sucker Watch: Most Participants Won’t Pay to Enter the 2013 Bay to Breakers Fun Run So Why Should You?

Tuesday, April 30th, 2013

Oh, you are a sucker. Well, then be my guest – pay $48 for a number. And actually, and you’ll enjoy this, sucker, it’s already too late to get a good deal on registration for 2013. Prices be higher now.

Most people who aren’t professional runners  don’t pay and here’s a good reason not to pay:

Your money goes directly to “Christian Billionaire” Philip Anschutz.

And then he takes your $$$$$ and uses it to, over the years, oppose the concept of evolution and fund anti-gay efforts.

(It’s funny that he even took an interest in this historic fun run and street party but he likes running so there y0u go.)

The reason that organizers won’t say how many “bandits” show up for the party is because they don’t want you to think that most people don’t pay.

But, IRL, most people don’t pay.

If you don’t believe me then take a NSFW look right here.

How many bibs do you see? Every year they say they will eject all these people and every year they don’t actually do it.

Now the San Francisco Nike Womens Marathon is different. You see, they give out coveted awards and people just can’t help themselves. And then stuff like this happens; “NO BIB NO BIB NO BIB!

But B2B aint like that.

One difference this year will be a limit on the size of the bags you might carry.

It’s like the size of Fook Mi’s backpack, best I can imagine.

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All right, have a great 2013 B2B.

And if you want to pay money to somebody, just take whatever your reg fee is and give it to Pride or whatever.

End Of Line.

Japantown Sumo by San Francisco Photographer Dave Golden

Monday, September 10th, 2012

As seen on Post Street by Dave Golden:

Wow.

Know Your Checker Marathon Cars: Marin Checker Taxi, 415-789-5356, Embarcadero Center

Monday, December 12th, 2011

Haven’t seen one of these in a long time:

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27th Annual Run Wild For A Child 5K and 10K a Huge Success in Golden Gate Park

Sunday, November 27th, 2011

Run Wild for a Child 2011 went off without a hitch today in Golden Gate Park.

It’s sort of like the Bay to Breakers annual civic event, except Run Wild isn’t owned by some hung-up, Burnsian, “Christian Billionaire” what lives in Colorado and uses your B2B entry fee to fight the concept of evolution. (How refreshing.)

Anyway, today’s 5K race was 3053 vs. 1729 leading most of the way through. One of these guys won, you’d think.

Is this Fell? I can’t really tell:

Here’s Oak, anyway:

As you can see, this race swings both ways, with 5K and 10K runners facing each other at times:

Monkey butts?

All right, see you next year!

10K • 5K featuring Run Wild For A Child Costume Contest

Sunday, November 27, 2011 • 8:30 AM START
27th Annual Thanksgiving Weekend Run
Golden Gate Park • San Francisco

KICK OFF THE HOLIDAY SEASON

Support San Francisco Firefighters Toy Program
Bring a new toy or two to donate to Bay Area Children in need
Run dressed as a toy in the “Run Wild Like A Child Costume Contest”
PRE-POST RACE EXPO

The entire event is staged from the Music Concourse in Golden Gate Park, which is the outdoor plaza in the center of:

California Academy of Sciences
De Young Museum
Japanese Tea Garden
Start Check-In is at Music Concourse — see below for Start details.

‘RUN WILD LIKE A CHILD 5K’ COSTUME CONTEST

Run or Walk the 5K dressed as a favorite childhood toy to be eligible for the costume contest judging. Prizes will be awarded to the Top Ten Costumes selected by the Judges. Click to see some past year’s costumes!

CUSTOM MEDAL WITH EVENT LOGO TO 1ST – 10TH PLACE COSTUME WINNERS
1st Place: Luxury Weekend for Two at Hotel Carlton (good through Nov. 2012) and $150 Gift Certificate to Sports Basement
2nd Place: $200.00 Sports Basement Gift Certificate & FRS healthy Energy Gift Pack
3rd Place: $100.00 Sports Basement Gift Certificate & FRS healthy Energy Gift Pack
4th Place: $50.00 Sports Basement Gift Certificate & FRS healthy Energy Gift Pack
5th –10 Place: A Sports Basement Gift Certificate good for a pair of Brooks shoes.
COSTUME JUDGING

All 5K Costume Contestants should report to the front of the starting line for initial judging from 8:00 AM – 8:20 AM.

Initial judging at the starting line from 8:15 – 8:30 AM
Semi-final judging – at the 5K finish line.
Final judging – at Bandshell Stage at 10:00 AM
POST RACE EXPO

After the race join us in the Music Concourse where you can ‘get down’ with live music provided by Pure Ecstasy while enjoying refreshments and the final costume judging on the main stage. Entrants can pick up their T-shirt and goodie bag, as well as visit sponsor booths for free samples and fitness information. The awards ceremony and Costume Parade & Judging will begin at approximately 10:00 AM at the Bandshell.

T-SHIRT PICK-UP

Pre-registered entrants may pick up their T-shirt with the full color logo in the Post-Race Expo area from 7:00 AM to 8:15 AM race morning or immediately following the race. Race Day entrants can pick up their shirt immediately following the race. The T-shirt Booth will be closed from 8:16 AM – 8:45 AM. T-shirt sizes cannot be guaranteed.

SUPPORTING

The San Francisco Firefighter’s Toy Program is the city’s largest and the nation’s oldest program of its kind. Distributing over 200,000 toys to more than 40,000 disadvantaged children. Besides helping individual families in need, the Toy Program serves many community organizations, including shelters for abused women and children, inner-city schools, neighborhood groups, children’s cancer wards, and pediatric AIDS units. SFFF Toy Program also responds on a year round basis to displaced children who become victims of fires, floods and other such disasters. The SFFF Toy Program is dependent solely on donations.

BRING A TOY and/or MAKE A DONATION
The San Francisco Firefighter’s Toy Program will be onsite race day accepting donations of new unwrapped toys. Entrants are encouraged to bring a toy or two on race day to donate and/or to make a cash donation when you register. Any donation above your entry fee will be given to the San Francisco Firefighters Toy Program and is a 100% tax deductible.