Posts Tagged ‘marina times’

How Wude! Marina Times Editor-in-Chief Susan Dyer Reynolds Bans Comments from Her “BMW SUV vs. SF Cyclist” Screed

Tuesday, September 11th, 2012

So Marina Times Editor in Chief Susan Dyer Reynolds had a kind of a breakdown a few months back, while she was piloting her giant BMW among cyclists on Page in one of the Haights.

Let’s review:

“Curly sped up and so did I, pulling in front of his bike, and trapping him between my SUV and the car parked next to him. As he came to a screeching halt, I rolled the window down a couple of inches. What color he had in his pale face drained and suddenly the smug smile was gone. “Are you crazy?” he asked, his voice shaking. Any ability I had to be rational went out my spit-covered window. “If I was crazy I would crush you like a bug right now,” I screamed.”

There wasn’t much of a reaction to this cry for help at first. But then a tiny blog (tiny but with more readers than the picayune Marina Times it’s safe to say) made a post about Susan’s breakdown, so she then got a whole bunch of reaction, from all across the country, mostly negative.

And then she posted some message about how she was going to deal with all the negative reaction in the September issue.

And then the comments disappeared.

And now, we have this.

“Virtual Ku Klux Klan”

“$10,000 in stolen funds stuffed in her blouse”

“Giada De Laurentiis has a bulbous candy apple head.”

It’s wide-ranging, certainly.

Anyway, I guess that’s that. That’s all we’ll be reading from her on the matter.

But you can find the basic gist of all those comments here, and other places I guess.

Marina District Gratified by All the White People Who Showed Up for America’s Cup – But Says No to Regular Tourists

Tuesday, September 11th, 2012

Work with me here. The recent America’s Cup scrimmage event up in San Francisco’s Great White North got this kind of reaction in the pages of the Marina Times:

“This event brought exactly the right kind of crowd to the Marina.”

Uh, white people with some extra folding money to spend – that kind of crowd?

Mmmm…

Anyway, you’d think that the friendly Marinites would similarly welcome the Feds landing Alcatraz tour boats at Fort Mason, right?

No.

Let’s hear from socially awkward, born-into-the-one-percent District Two Supervisor Mark Farrell in the very same pages of the Marina Times:

“The National Park Service’s (NPS) intention to study Fort Mason as a possible location for its Alcatraz tour ferry service is one of those ideas with serious and long-lasting impacts that must immediately be put to rest.”

(Yeah, it’s one of those ideas, huh? So like, Alex, I want “Ideas with serious and long-lasting impacts that must immediately be put to rest” for $1600?”)

Apparently, one set of aquatic tourists is the best thing in the world and another set of aquatic tourists is the worst thing in the world?

OK fine.

Hey Marina, look at this! You think the future can’t cross a bridge ride through a tunnel?

Now here’s the kicker. The reason why the white people of the Marina are worried about the Fort Mason proposal is that it’s a lead pipe cinch, owing to the lack of NIMBY laws on federal land:

“What makes the idea even more distressing to residents and establishments in the Marina is the lack of local environmental review and input that would be available. The NPS stated that environmental review of the Fort Mason site would be conducted under the National Environmental Policy Act (NEPA) and not under the California Environmental Quality Act (CEQA), because Fort Mason is federal property. Without a CEQA process in place for Fort Mason, the enormous changes contemplated in the Marina will never be considered by our local government, and any NEPA appeal would have to take place in Washington through the federal courts. In my letter to the NPS, I asked that since they are prepared to undergo a CEQA analysis for the sites located at the Port of San Francisco piers, they should do the same for the NPS-owned piers at Fort Mason…”

So, don’t come here, Feds. Don’t come here where it’s super easy to do business, you know, without dealing with millionaire NIMBYs for decades, oh no, don’t even think about it! Feds, you must immediately put the idea “to rest.”

Well, we’ll just have to wait and see how that works…

Marina Times Editor-in-Chief Susan Dyer Reynolds Bans Comments on Her Wild BMW SUV vs. Bike Screed

Friday, August 24th, 2012

Am I missing something here? Susan Dyer Reynolds penned a piece last month, you know, about her little incident with a cyclist on Page Street but now all the comments about her behavior have been removed. There was a whole mess of them last I saw.

Oh well.

Let’s see here, who about town is known for banning comments? Well, struggling blogger Eve Batey of SFAppeal banned me (for life!) from making comments on her blog a while back, for politely correcting her about the price of the fare for the now-defunct CultureBus, stuff like that. (I was just trying to help her, you know. Oh well.) And corrupt Willie Brown / Ed Lee lackey Randy Shaw of Beyond Chron / Tenderloin Housing Clinic, he bans comments all the time. Why’s that? He wants to get $90-something million from the City and County of San Francisco so that he can improperly influence the government into … giving him $100,000,000 the next go-around and he doesn’t want people talking about that?

Those are the two I can think of off-hand.

Anyway, I don’t think SDR planned on getting the response she got.

Do you think she received a lot of support from her rich white lady friends? I don’t.

Do you think she got negative comments from her peers? I do.

Maybe she’s learned her lesson.

We’ll see.

OH MY. HERE COMES AN ACCOUNT FROM THE GREAT WHITE NORTH, SAN FRANCISCO’S MARINA DISTRICT. (THINK OF THE PLACE AS SAN FRANCISCO’S VERY OWN LITTLE SLICE OF MARIN COUNTY.)

LEAVE US BEGIN. TAKE IT AWAY, HELEN LOVEJOY / SUSAN DYER REYNOLDS:

Page Street has become the bane of my existence where bicyclists behaving badly are concerned.”

OK, LET’S CHECK THE WICKTIONARY, YOU KNOW, JUST TO BE SURE: “A cause of misery or death; an affliction or curse.” CAUSE, YOU KNOW, I STILL DON’T KNOW WTF YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT, EXCEPTING FOR YOU NOT LIKING BIKES ON PAGE STREET, WHICH, BTW, IS A FUNNY PLACE FOR A RICH WHITE LADY FROM THE MARINA TO BE HANGING OUT ON A REGULAR BASIS. BUT ANYWAY.

Driving home one recent afternoon, I stopped at a four-way sign, looked all directions, and proceeded into the intersection. Out of nowhere, a bicyclist flew through the stop sign to my left, riding right in front of me, forcing me to slam on the brakes.

UH, YOU LOOKED BUT YOU DIDN’T SEE. MMMM…. PERHAPS THE CYCLIST WAS SURPRISED THAT YOU ACTUALLY STOPPED. I’D RECOMMEND A CALIFORNIA STOP INSTEAD OF THE WAY THAT YOU STOP.

I came inches from hitting him, but he didn’t notice. As he pedaled along the right side of the street, I pulled up next to his rickety bike, rolled down my window, and said, “You have to stop at stop signs just like cars do.”

RICKETY? I THINK THAT’S MEANT AS AN INSULT? NOW ACTUALLY, RICH WHITE LADY, I THINK BIKES ARE GIVEN MORE LEEWAY IN SAN FRANCISCO THAN CARS. KEEP THAT IN MIND THE NEXT TIME YOU VENTURE INTO THE HAIGHTS.

The scrawny, pale, twenty-something with thinning curly dark hair – wearing only Bermuda shorts, a T-shirt and, of course, no helmet – flipped me off and shouted a string of expletives.

SCRAWNY, PALE, THINNING HAIR? MORE DEETS! WE GOTS TO HAVE MORE DEETS!

I felt my Sicilian blood boiling as I kept pace with him.

THIS IS WHAT SUPERVISOR JANE KIM CALLS “WHITE PRIVILEGE,” I MEAN, I’M JUST SAYING, RIGHT?

“Why is it you think you’re exempt from the law?” Suddenly and without warning, like the snake that he was, Curly whipped his head around and spit at me from the passenger side.

SNAKES WHIP THEIR HEADS AND SPIT? OK FINE, RWL.

I was in the process of rolling up the window, so his wad of spit didn’t hit me. Instead, it bubbled slowly down the window of my just-washed car.

JUST WASHED? KELL DOMAGE!

I kept pace with Curly, rolling the window down part way again. “What you just did qualifies as battery in the state of California,” I yelled, “and you should be arrested for road rage.”

UH, NOT REALLY.

Curly laughed and flipped me off with both hands as he steered the bike with his knees.

UH, IRL? I DON’T THINK SO.

“What are you going to do about it?” he asked smugly. Curly sped up and so did I, pulling in front of his bike, and trapping him between my SUV and the car parked next to him.

UH, I THINK YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO TELL PEOPLE STUFF LIKE THIS? I MEAN, YOU”RE NOT SUPPOSED TO PUT THIS KIND OF A STATEMENT INTO A NEWSPAPER, NO MATTER HOW PODUNK / PICAYUNE IT IS.

As he came to a screeching halt, I rolled the window down a couple of inches. What color he had in his pale face drained and suddenly the smug smile was gone. “Are you crazy?” he asked, his voice shaking.

YOU GO GIRL! YOU GO, YOU CRAZY RICH WHITE GIRL!

Any ability I had to be rational went out my spit-covered window.

HE DROVE YOU TO IT! JUST LIKE IN THE BURNING BED!

“If I was crazy I would crush you like a bug right now,” I screamed. “Fortunately for you, I’m not crazy – but the next person you spit at might be and they could run you over or pull out a gun and shoot you.”

I’M SPEECHLESS.

Suddenly Curly was mute. Having made my point, and thinking maybe Curly learned his lesson, I rolled up the window and continued on my way home.

WOW, I THINK WE’RE GOING TO HAVE TO CUT THIS OFF. PICKING UP HERE:

More than ever, I believe it’s time to hold bicyclists accountable for their actions, and that means license numbers that are visible to cops, victims and witnesses – just like on the cars and motorcycles they share the streets with.

AND I THINK WE SHOULD HAVE PEDESTRIAN LICENSES – WHO’S WITH ME?

IN CLOSING, RICH WHITE LADY, YOU CRAY-CRAY.

AND NOT IN A GOOD WAY.

MSM Writer From the Marina Times Goes a Little Crazy in Her BMW SUV – Tries to Teach Cyclist a Lesson

Wednesday, August 1st, 2012

OH MY. HERE COMES AN ACCOUNT FROM THE GREAT WHITE NORTH, SAN FRANCISCO’S MARINA DISTRICT. (THINK OF THE PLACE AS SAN FRANCISCO’S VERY OWN LITTLE SLICE OF MARIN COUNTY.)

LEAVE US BEGIN. TAKE IT AWAY, HELEN LOVEJOY / SUSAN DYER REYNOLDS:

Page Street has become the bane of my existence where bicyclists behaving badly are concerned.”

OK, LET’S CHECK THE WICKTIONARY, YOU KNOW, JUST TO BE SURE: “A cause of misery or death; an affliction or curse.” CAUSE, YOU KNOW, I STILL DON’T KNOW WTF YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT, EXCEPTING FOR YOU NOT LIKING BIKES ON PAGE STREET, WHICH, BTW, IS A FUNNY PLACE FOR A RICH WHITE LADY FROM THE MARINA TO BE HANGING OUT ON A REGULAR BASIS. BUT ANYWAY.

Driving home one recent afternoon, I stopped at a four-way sign, looked all directions, and proceeded into the intersection. Out of nowhere, a bicyclist flew through the stop sign to my left, riding right in front of me, forcing me to slam on the brakes.

UH, YOU LOOKED BUT YOU DIDN’T SEE. MMMM…. PERHAPS THE CYCLIST WAS SURPRISED THAT YOU ACTUALLY STOPPED. I’D RECOMMEND A CALIFORNIA STOP INSTEAD OF THE WAY THAT YOU STOP.

I came inches from hitting him, but he didn’t notice. As he pedaled along the right side of the street, I pulled up next to his rickety bike, rolled down my window, and said, “You have to stop at stop signs just like cars do.”

RICKETY? I THINK THAT’S MEANT AS AN INSULT? NOW ACTUALLY, RICH WHITE LADY, I THINK BIKES ARE GIVEN MORE LEEWAY IN SAN FRANCISCO THAN CARS. KEEP THAT IN MIND THE NEXT TIME YOU VENTURE INTO THE HAIGHTS.

The scrawny, pale, twenty-something with thinning curly dark hair – wearing only Bermuda shorts, a T-shirt and, of course, no helmet – flipped me off and shouted a string of expletives.

SCRAWNY, PALE, THINNING HAIR? MORE DEETS! WE GOTS TO HAVE MORE DEETS!

I felt my Sicilian blood boiling as I kept pace with him.

THIS IS WHAT SUPERVISOR JANE KIM CALLS “WHITE PRIVILEGE,” I MEAN, I’M JUST SAYING, RIGHT?

“Why is it you think you’re exempt from the law?” Suddenly and without warning, like the snake that he was, Curly whipped his head around and spit at me from the passenger side.

SNAKES WHIP THEIR HEADS AND SPIT? OK FINE, RWL.

I was in the process of rolling up the window, so his wad of spit didn’t hit me. Instead, it bubbled slowly down the window of my just-washed car.

JUST WASHED? KELL DOMAGE!

I kept pace with Curly, rolling the window down part way again. “What you just did qualifies as battery in the state of California,” I yelled, “and you should be arrested for road rage.”

UH, NOT REALLY.

Curly laughed and flipped me off with both hands as he steered the bike with his knees.

UH, IRL? I DON’T THINK SO.

“What are you going to do about it?” he asked smugly. Curly sped up and so did I, pulling in front of his bike, and trapping him between my SUV and the car parked next to him.

UH, I THINK YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO TELL PEOPLE STUFF LIKE THIS? I MEAN, YOU”RE NOT SUPPOSED TO PUT THIS KIND OF A STATEMENT INTO A NEWSPAPER, NO MATTER HOW PODUNK / PICAYUNE IT IS.

As he came to a screeching halt, I rolled the window down a couple of inches. What color he had in his pale face drained and suddenly the smug smile was gone. “Are you crazy?” he asked, his voice shaking.

YOU GO GIRL! YOU GO, YOU CRAZY RICH WHITE GIRL!

Any ability I had to be rational went out my spit-covered window.

HE DROVE YOU TO IT! JUST LIKE IN THE BURNING BED!

“If I was crazy I would crush you like a bug right now,” I screamed. “Fortunately for you, I’m not crazy – but the next person you spit at might be and they could run you over or pull out a gun and shoot you.”

I’M SPEECHLESS.

Suddenly Curly was mute. Having made my point, and thinking maybe Curly learned his lesson, I rolled up the window and continued on my way home.

WOW, I THINK WE’RE GOING TO HAVE TO CUT THIS OFF. PICKING UP HERE:

More than ever, I believe it’s time to hold bicyclists accountable for their actions, and that means license numbers that are visible to cops, victims and witnesses – just like on the cars and motorcycles they share the streets with.

AND I THINK WE SHOULD HAVE PEDESTRIAN LICENSES – WHO’S WITH ME?

IN CLOSING, RICH WHITE LADY, YOU CRAY-CRAY.

AND NOT IN A GOOD WAY.

Halloween Edition of the Marina Times: Bros, High-Fives, Charlie Sheen Costume, Passed-Out Sorority Girl, Fuss

Monday, October 31st, 2011

The NIMBYish Marina Times newspaper, via The Tens:

Click to expand

But IRL, Halloween in the Marina District actually looks like more like this.