Posts Tagged ‘mouth’

The Happiest Breakfast in the World is as Close as Your Nearest Costco

Wednesday, April 7th, 2010

When you’re in training for the rigorous straight-outta-British Columbia Justin Herman Plaza Zipline, well, you need to exercise and eat right.

And after your work out, what could more entertaining than noshing on this still-life tabletop tableau?

See? The gorgeous green Granny Ramsey Smith* apples** are the eyes. They’re from the Yakima Valley, all the way up there near the aforementioned B.C., Canada.

Does the fact that they are from a thousand li away upset you?   

Should that upset you?

*Call them “baking apples” and I’ll cut you. Super-crunchy Grannies like these are for eating, not baking.

**Leave us not discuss Costco’s bananas in the 415 area. They are consistently substandard, IMO.

Laser-Equipped Giant Walrus Destroys San Francisco in this Mural at 232 Haight in the Lower Haight

Friday, February 26th, 2010

[Andrew Dalton, That Aggressive Panhandler, has all the deets of the somewhat similar laser kittehs mural going up on Divisadero at the Harding Theatre, our Brokedown Palace.]

A laser beam-enabled giant walrus is depicted on this mural in a large arched window at 232 Fillmore near Laussat just up from Waller in the Lower Haight.

Enjoy:

Click to expand

OMG! No More Sparks Brand Alcoholic Energy Drinks for California!

Thursday, December 18th, 2008

Well, it had to happen, sooner or later. First, let’s get up to speed about Sparks (whoops, that official MillerCoors website got taken down, try this cached version instead.) So Sparks, created by S.F.-based beverage marketing firm McKenzie River Corporation on 1160 Battery, is:

“a caffeinated alcohol beverage, one of the first such beverages. Its active ingredients caffeine, taurine, ginseng and guarana are common to energy drinks; however, its additional focus on alcohol is not. Its packaging states a 6% alcoholic content by volume. Its flavor is similar to standard energy drinks such as Red Bull, Monster Energy, and Rockstar, with a tart, sugary taste.”

Sounds good so far, right? Well maybe not, as some teens run into trouble when they maybe look at Sparks’ “juvenile web site” and then get “hyper and drunk at the same time.”

Say good-bye to getting loaded and showing off your orange tongue in the minivan: 

Sisters doing it for themselves. Click for full-on girl power, courtesy of rOOkrOc

Comes now, City Attorney Dennis Herrera, representing the City and County of San Francisco, plus the entire State of California to make a deal with MillerCoors to stop selling Sparks (as it exists today complete with energy stuff plus alcohol) by January 10, 2009. Read all the deets after the jump, or here on CA Attorney General Jerry Brown’s website.

MillerCoors can take out the caffeine, taurine, etc. if they want to but Sparks, as you know it, will soon be no more. What will the Examiner’s Caffeine Examiner Big Red Boots (srsly, “Caffeine Examiner“) think aboot that, eh? And don’t even ask what the Examiner’s Civil Liberties Examiner and Ayn Rand fan JD Tuccille (srsly, “JD“) will think about this, because you can already figure it out.

What will become of the “Sparks Girls” and “Sparkitects“?

by ncsparkitect

Sadly, there’ll be no more orange-lipped photos (aka Sparks Mouth) on Flickr from Sparks virgins and no more Sparks-related sexy MySpace-style poses on the Net. It’s all gone.

The Center for Science in the Public Interest says YES! And of course, Nintendo’s Mario says “let’s a go!”

What do you say?

Details after the jump.

(more…)