Posts Tagged ‘parking’

Mother of All Double Parkers: The Super Pretzel Truck – Blocking Outbound Market Daily

Tuesday, February 10th, 2015

If I were the Super Pretzel pushcart people on Market at the cable car turnaround, I’d push these carts somewhere else before the lengthy loading and unloading process:

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Just saying…

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But these people don’t care – on they go with lifting and the lowering, on they go as westbound traffic backs up behind them…

What Percentage of the Drivers of These Cars Use Handicap Placards to Get Free Parking, You Know, Primarily?

Friday, February 6th, 2015

I’m guessing 66%, or 100%.

(If you want to see scenes like this, head to Washington and Davis, just north of the Financh. And for some reason, handicap placard users tend to have brand new cars, and a lot of them have Mercedes-Benz S-Classes…)

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Hey, here’s another question:

What percentage of California physicians have ever been disciplined for signing off  on somebody’s handicap placard application?

The answer is zero percent (0%), in the entire history of Cali.

So that’s why it’s preferable for doctors to just sign your form instead of explaining why s/he doesn’t want to sign your form and, and, you know, piss you off.

You know, I’m in my 40’s, but when I was in my 30’s, my knees felt warm for a couple days. I looked it up and thought, oh so that’s what bursitis is. And people were all no you don’t have bursitis, that’s what plumbers get. And I thought, no, plumbers get chronic bursitis and I got me some acute bursitis. So I took an ibu pill and that was that – I never had this symptom again. Now, Gentle Reader, do you think I could go to a doctor, or a non-doctor, cause the DMV takes the word of pretty much anyone, and say I want a handicap placard for my bursitis condition, and then get a handicap placard, and then park all day all day, for free? I bet I could.

Not that I would.

But I’ll tell you, whenever SFGov gets around to ending this FREE PARKING FIESTA scam, watch them all fall down.

As up in Portland, OR. Hey, you know Portland is a leader in so many things, so guess what they just did up there? That’s right, NO SOUP FOR YOU! And, all of a sudden, most of the handicapped placards went away.

Someday this will happen down here in SF.

Someday.

Oh My, It’s ARBOR-GEDDON 2015 – The SFMTA Wants to Kill Hundreds of Healthy Street Trees to Slow Down Traffic on Masonic

Thursday, February 5th, 2015

See this giant, healthy tree at Geary and Masonic? The DPW just put a death notice on it:

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Around its waist, with clear packing tape.

And this sidewalk grove is doomed as well, at the western edge of the intersection above the Geary Tunnel:

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Here’s what the notices look like:

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And here are the smaller, run-of-the-mill trees street to south:

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Chop chop, 300+ (300x, in SFGov parlance) trees, all gone.

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Let’s see here, is the SFMTA’s Grand Unified Plan for the 3000 feet of Masonic betwixt Geary and Fell going to:

SPEED UP MUNI BUSES? Nope. In fact, the Plan will slow down MUNI buses, like part of the Plan is already doing that already, at Ewing Terrace, for example. (The nearby City Target had some mad money so it gave a quarter million to the SFMTA to put in a new light at Ewing in order to gain support for The Plan from a woman who lives on The Terrace.) This plan will slow down MUNI. Simply. Yet somehow, it will “increase access” to transit, by giving people the right to sit longer at bus stops?

SPEED UP THE REST OF TRAFFIC ON MASONIC, THE GREAT CONNECTOR WHAT LINKS THE PARKSIDE, THE SUNSET, AND THE RICHMOND WITH THE REST OF SAN FRANCISCO, CONNECTING BUSH PINE WITH LINCOLN, FULTON, OAK, FELL, TURK, BALBOA, AND GEARY? Oh, Hell no. Masonic will turn into a congested parking lot during the morning and evening drives, ala Oak Street, ala Octavia Boulevard. Buses will no longer pull over into stops – they’ll simply stop and block the slow lane, leaving the solitary remaining lane, the “fast” lane, to temporarily serve as the only way for motorized traffic to travel on Masonic.

INCREASE “ACCESS” TO MUNI? We’ll see. The SFMTA is claiming that rebuilt bus stops will be the big benefit to MUNI riders.

INCREASE THE NUMBER OF PARKING SPACES IN THE AREA? Oh no. In fact, the Plan will remove 100-something 22-hour-a-day parking spaces from Masonic. (For some this is a feature and not a detriment.)

BENEFIT CYCLISTS? Perhaps. This, see below, is what people do these days, for the most part – they ride their bikes on the wide wide sidewalks, going uphill, for the most part, as I’ve been doing for a couple decades. SFGov is free to make this practice legal on Masonic, but it chooses not to. In fact, SFGov is sometimes reluctant to make piecemeal changes, for safety or whatever, because SFGov shuns so-called “chop-shop” projects – SFGov prefers giant pork-barrel projects paid for by, among others, people living in North Dakota. And then, if residents started to think that Masonic was then “fixed,” through small changes, that would lessen the pressure for a big pork barrel project using money from the Feds and Sacramento.  Anywho, most of the coming changes to Masonic appear to favor bike riders, so yes, we’ll be getting separated lanes up and down Masonic. And then, we’ll have less of this:

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We did lose a bike rider to a severely drunk driver a few years back on Masonic. Such an accident would be less likely to occur after the coming changes. [UPDATE: IMO, that is. If you want to say that accidents can happen anyway even after the changes, I’ll agree, but this particular accident involved two people consuming 14(!) drinks at Kokkari restaurant on Jackson and then using Masonic to get to the Avenues out west, and I’ll tell you, the future Masonic would have been easier for this driver to navigate. I mean he made it all the way from 200 Jackson to the 94117 without hitting anything but his brain didn’t have the processing power to deal with the cyclist being where the cyclist was.]

BENEFIT PEDESTRIANS? Perhaps. The hundreds of healthy trees that the SFMTA is going to chop down will get replaced, one supposes, with new trees, planted in an unnecessary, unnecessarily-wide new median, which effectively widens the street, right? Why are we going to get the big median? For aesthetics. For oxygen, cause, you know, trees produce oxygen – did you know that!? I’ll tell you, this truth just blew me away when I found out about it, when I five freaking years old. But the SFMTA had some lady come to one of the meetings to talk about all the extra oxygen molecules that we’d have floating around, OK fine. Of course, the SFMTA didn’t talk about any of the concomitant downsides of spending all these tens of millions of pork barrel dollars from Uncle Sucker, the SFMTA didn’t mention ARBOR-GEDDEN 2015. Anyway, if peds prefer having new trees in a median over older trees closer to them, well, sure, I suppose that peds will benefit. And speaking of severely drunk drivers, we did lose a ped to a drunk driver within recent memory – I don’t think the recent changes would have affected that crime though. And we lost an architect just north of Geary on Masonic owing to her jaywalking to get to Trader Joe’s #100, a few years back. owing to a poorly planned parking situation courtesy of our Planning Department. But the grand mal Plan for Masonic stops at Geary, so the SFMTA doesn’t appear to even to pretend to care about safety on Masonic north of Geary, not at this time.

Oh what’s that, you have questions? Fire away:

ISN’T IT TRUE THAT “THE COMMUNITY” SUPPORTS THE PLAN?

No, not necessarily. Any public meeting that the SFMTA might refer to was packed with activists/urbanists who don’t live in the neighborhood. So a tally from some meeting made up 70% of activist members of the San Francisco Bicycle Coalition isn’t an actual survey, right? If you want to say that a vote only made up of people who care enough to show up to all the meetings is what we should follow, then be my guest. But any SFMTA focus group meeting about which SFMTA plan attendees prefer doesn’t mean that The Plan is supported by the people who live, work and pass through Masonic, right?

WON’T ALL THE NEW CONGESTION, THE GREAT SLOWDOWN, INCREASE SAFETY? 

We’ll see. We’ll see what the unexamined effects will be, like, where will traffic go instead of Masonic? Will that new traffic in other areas cause new accidents in other areas? We’ll see.

WELL, WHAT ABOUT THE PROPERTY OWNERS DIRECTLY ON MASONIC, DON’T MOST OF THEM SUPPORT THE PLAN? 

I don’t know, maybe. A lot of them aren’t looking forward to all the construction, so there goes a lot of support right there. I mean, what if there was going to be a pork barrel project that was going to “beautify” the area just outside your property and the govmint was going to spend $50K per parcel in your nabe – would you like that? Maybe. And I’ll tell you, there’s a parochial school what costs $30K per year per student that’s in favor of the Plan. I say parochial because people at the school think that way, they think that the school is so so special that of course everybody should come to a crawl when they pass by. The school is the center of the universe, in their eyes, so people traveling by shouldn’t just rush through. The problem with this attitude is that, for the vast majority, GOLDEN GATE, TURK AND MASONIC, the Great Crossroads is not a destination in itself. So, ideally, we’d balance a whole bunch of factors and concerns, we’d actually consult with the people who actually use Masonic now. Those at this rich kids school, those small individuals with parochial attitudes, just don’t care.

BUT WON’T THE PLAN INCREASE PUBLIC SAFETY OVERALL AND HELP GET US TO VISION ZERO 2024?

We’ll see. But by then, it will be too late, and by then, the SFMTA will be more than happy to spend tens of millions of dollars to “tune up” the Big Project. And Vision Zero 2014-2024 is like two Soviet-style Five Year Plans strung together – nobody believes that transportation deaths in San Francisco will “whither away,” but everybody involved acts as if there’s a chance that this fantasy will come true. And you know, there are some countries that have had more success in reducing deaths than so-called Vision Zero countries, right? So what’s so special about that particular name? I don’t get it.

IS IT TRUE THAT SOME PEOPLE ON AND NEAR MASONIC STRONGLY OPPOSE THE PLAN? 

Hell yes. People put homemade signs in their windows. It’s too late though – I can’t think of anything that would stop the SFMTA now.

BUT DIDN’T THE SFMTA SAY THAT THERE WAS NO OPPOSITION TO THE PLAN?  

Yep. The SFMTA lied about that, when its employees filled out some necessary paperwork. I’ll tell you, there’s no way that the SFMTA isn’t going to spend any pork barrel money it can spend. That’s its purpose.

So that’s the update on Masonic.

I live very close by – we’ll have to wait and see if I personally benefit from all this spending. Somebody in the opposition one time asked me if I personally supported the project and I had to think about it. Perhaps it will benefit me, we’ll see. It seems selfish, to me, to dwell on the issue. In any event, the SFMTA gets excused for nothing. This project is a case study of how the SFMTA does what the SFMTA wants to do, which is to spend money and increase the size of … the SFMTA. If you want to get into how the SFMTA is all about safety, well, I disagree with that, but that would be something to debate. IMO, the SFMTA could “increase safety” without it getting any more money than it gets now.

IMO.

Enjoy the coming SFMTA Mass Arborcide – it should be a spectacle.

How is This Official SFGov SFMTA Red-Painted Parking Space Labelled “CAR SHARE” If It’s Only for Avis RENTAL CAR?

Wednesday, February 4th, 2015

Help me out here, Gentle Reader. This formerly public parking space is now a private parking space, one that’s being rented out to Avis Rent a Car System, LLC, aka the Avis Budget Group.

But Avis isn’t actually “sharing” cars with you, it’s renting cars to you, right?

Is this what they call “framing?” Why is the SFMTA “framing” issues for Avis this way? Was Ron Conway involved with this? David Chiu?

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I don’t get it.

So, just as soylent green is people, Zipcar is Avis, and CAR SHARE is CAR RENTAL, right?

What am I missing here?

The Time of the Week When the SFMTA Doesn’t Seem to Mind Cars Parked on the Sidewalk

Friday, January 30th, 2015

The white truck on the left is parked on the sidewalk. The SFMTA “knows” this because a dozen SFMTA-employed eyeballs have just passed by to see it. Yet, it didn’t get ticketed.

OTOH, the white car on the far right _did_ get a ticket, you can see it, for blocking a street sweeper on street sweeping day

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These practices have developed over the years – they’re a culture.

If you ask somebody from the SFMTA about this sitch, they’d be all, well, call it in and we’ll come out and give it a ticket. (When SFGov doesn’t have the will to enforce its own rules, it says the whole process is “complaint driven.”)

Anyway, this is the culture, not that you’d find it officially documented anywhere…

Old School: 1) Struggle to Leave the Projects. 2) Celebrate by Buying a Mercedes – New School: Struggle to Get _Into_ the Projects

Wednesday, January 28th, 2015

And of course, get the Mercedes first, the better to enjoy your free parking space a stone’s throw from City Hall, you know, when you get the chance to move in.

Thusly, as seen on McAllister, pulling into the PJs near Gough.

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Did I mention that this is a gated community? Yes, it is. One supposes residents are given gate-opening Genie-style remotes to put inside their Mercedeses.

Sometimes you look and half the cars parked inside the gates are Mercedeses, Lexuseses or BMW’s.

Oh Lord, won’t You buy me a Mercedes Benz? 

How the SFMTA Got Me – I Mistakenly Blocked 30 Feet of the Western Addition from Street Sweeping – Street Trees

Tuesday, January 27th, 2015

Here’s what the signs look like around the corner:

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Good, because it was a Friday.

Oh, here we go:

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But then you get a ticket, anyway.

Whoops. Here’s what the signs actually say:

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(At least this street tree didn’t topple over and kill me, as street trees have killed and injured so many others.)

I can tell you chapter and verse about this nabe, mostly about who got shot where, but I haven’t kept up with the street cleaning signs….

San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee Sadly Caresses a Broken Smart Parking Meter, Or That’s What It Looks Like To Me

Monday, January 26th, 2015

Direct from the SFMTA:

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Here’s the caption:

Report Broken Meters and Faded Curbs
Where the curb has faded so badly as to be difficult to determine the curb color, it will be enforced for curb color violations. And while you may only park for the posted time limit at a broken meter, functioning meters guarantee better parking availability for everyone. Help us keep meters working and curb colors bright and up to date by calling 311. By calling 311 you’ll create a record so that the curb or meter will be evaluated.”

Actually, I’m still not sure it’s not him.

Why San Francisco Loves Mini Coopers: Being Able to Park Between Driveways in the Avenues – Three in a Row

Tuesday, January 20th, 2015

Via SF photographer James Corrigan, who says:

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“Give me 146.6 inches of curb space in the Inner Sunset and I will find you parking. Advertisement for the Mini-Cooper.”

The Worst Scooter Parking Job Ever in the History of San Francisco

Friday, January 16th, 2015

Reader “C” saw how a Bro manspreaded his red scooter:

“No doubt there will be notes left on his scooter. That’s not very nice parking. Is he making a point or something?”

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Men are pigs, right ladies? I’ll bet this San Francisco scooter jockey wouldn’t dream of parking in such a fashion…

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