Posts Tagged ‘redroom’

District Five Meltdown: Going Over Ivory Madison’s Sanctimonious YouTube Demo Reel Against Christina Olague, Line By Line

Monday, November 5th, 2012

Here’s a one-minute hit piece against Christina Olague from Ross Mirkarimi neighbor Ivory Madison:

Yes, she’s coming back for more.

You have the script so here my notes:

1. Your name is Ivory Madison for real? Oh. Really? How theatrical.

2. I think you mean former friend, right?

3. [Sanctimonious line reading but otherwise within the bounds of reality.]

4. I think I’m going to call bullshit on this one. That’s just your opinion, IM.

5. So you “contacted the police on her behalf” but without her permission? And in a maladroit fashion to boot, one might add. Like using your personal iPhone to do so, “anonymously.” You’re not that sharp, are you, IM?

6. [Sanctimonious line reading but otherwise within the bounds of reality.]

7. All right, I’ll bite. How does suspending Ross Mirkarimi protect victims of DV? 

8. Uh Madison, I don’t think you can declare victory before a process ends, right?  And it turns out that Christina Olague’s vote didn’t matter nohow. You understand that, right? 

9. You didn’t want to get involved? Are you fucking serious – who’s going to believe that, Huntress? 

10. Voters need to know what Olague did? Don’t they know already? Mmmm…

11. Is Ross Mirkarimi a “convicted batterer” like in real life? What does the word “batterer” mean? What does the word “batter” mean? Oh, what’s that, you didn’t actually have a chance to learn that in colledge because you thought a high school diploma would suffice when applying to Stanford Law?  That might have worked for Daredevil Matt Murdock in the comix but I don’t think that kind of thing works IRL.

12. Um, I think Ross Mirkarimi is your Sheriff because your neighbors voted for him, like overwhelmingly, right? Didn’t you host a fundraiser for him?

13. Does Christina Olague really think “it’s OK to abuse your wife?”  Any support at all for this, you know, outside of this particular vendetta? Wow. 

Hey Ivory. You talk about law school so much, why not just sign up for the state bar exam and study for it? You could pass if you applied yourself.

Just asking…

Leave Us Review: Ivory Madison is NOT a “Trained Attorney” and is NOT a “Nonpracticing Attorney” and is NOT Any Other Kind

Monday, March 5th, 2012

Now if you want to say that now-famous nonlawyer Ivory Madison was trained as an attorney, well, that would be O.K., I s’pose, but you can’t allege, as some have, recently, that she’s a “trained attorney.”

No.

No, no, no, no, no.*

Cause, you see, that goes too far.

OTOH, you can say that certain people thought IM was an attorney, for good reason, actually, and acted accordingly.

You could say that.

Imagine you’re a high school football player who went to a Catholic church to confess to sexual contact with a 15-year-old only to find out that the priest you thought you were talking to was actually Ashton Kutcher punking you. Would your mouthpiece start saying how evidence of your privileged communication should be thrown out of court because Ashton is a “trained priest?”

I doubt it.

But there are other good arguments to make, right?

Having said that, there’s nothing out there to suggest that Ivory acted improperly in the case at hand.

Did she “struggle” with the issues? Perhaps, but so have others before her

Let’s hope this is the final Ivory Madison is not an attorney post you’ll have to read.

Oh, so it turns out Ivory Madison a merely a “law school graduate.”

NTTAWWT. Not at all.

But when you hold yourself out as a “nonpracticing lawyer,” well, that can create confusion, non? 

Via ComicVine 

I think I’ll file this one under alpha female self-puffery, and that will that be that.

All right, GASNM.

(Boy, San Francisco is a small town, huh?)

*My top five favorite poetic devices of all time are repetition, repetition, repetition, repetition, and repetition.

Oh, Turns Out That Ivory Madison Isn’t Any Kind of Attorney at All – A Mystery Solved

Tuesday, January 31st, 2012

Oh, so it turns out you’re a “law school graduate.”

NTTAWWT. Not at all.

But when you hold yourself out as a “nonpracticing lawyer,” well, that can create confusion, non? 

Via ComicVine 

I think I’ll file this one under alpha female self-puffery, and that will that be that.

All right, GASNM.

(Boy, San Francisco is a small town, huh?)