Posts Tagged ‘sf gate’

The Simple Joy of Playing Your First Round of Street Tetherball in the Western Addition Northeast of the Panhandle

Monday, March 16th, 2015

Look for San Francisco Chronicle writer and long-time east bay resident CW Get Off My Lawn Nevius* to decry this type of vandalism, you know, after getting contacted, once again, by Yet Another SFGov Department Head.

Oh, our youth, won’t somebody please decry our youth, won’t somebody please harp against the externalizes they generate while consistently ignoring the externalizes generated by older people, such as our Favorite Writer From The East Bay. Oh well, more street clean-up work for DPW:

7J7C3800 copy

Ah, memories:

“[Appointed Mayor Ed] Lee has placed Nuru in charge of a city department with a $129 million city budget and 1,200 employees, despite Nuru’s proven history of directing his subordinates to illegally campaign for his mayoral benefactors. You couldn’t even make this stuff up, and even Examiner columnist Melissa Griffin flatly calls the move “stupid.”

Moving on…

Oh, here’s a graphic for Chuck:


Perhaps CWNevius is overcompensating for his and his generation’s crimes of the past?


*And that’s just the past month!

SFGate Knows Me All So Well: “YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE … THE 10 BIGGEST BOOTIES OF 2014” – Boo-tay, Boo-tay, Boo-tay!

Tuesday, April 22nd, 2014

It’s come to this – my history of clicking on SFGate has finally come to this:

Click to expand

I love boo-tay (We Love it)/

Is Simple-Minded Sportswriter CW Nevius Claiming Copyright on a Crime Photo Given To Him by the SFPD?

Tuesday, August 2nd, 2011

Seems that way.

Check it.

Here’s a version of a security camera shot of a recent cell phone “heist,” or what what the world’s non-Nevii would probably call a robbery:

Click to expand

Should I claim credit for this photo as well? I mean, do you think that you took this photo yourself, Nevius?

Moving on:

“As he headed down the street, he must have thought the heist* had gone perfectly.”

Uh, hello, Nevius. You’re not telling a story in a bar here, you’re writing for the Paper of Record. So you shouldn’t make up what the thoughts of strangers are. Remember, fundamentally, you’re just a simple-minded sportswriter – you’re not God, you’re not omniscient, right?

“What he didn’t know was that new technology captured everything on video.

It’s not new technology, Neve. It’s the opposite of new technology. Do you even know what the word “technology”** means, Neve? I don’t think you do.

“Civil libertarians are likely to complain about creeping Big Brother-ism, but that horse has long since left the barn.”

Well that’s sort of their job, by definition. Do you think a phalanx of monolithic civil libertarians will react to this incident as you suggest they will?

I don’t.

Nevius, do you have somebody who could look over your words before the hot metal starts to fly? Maybe somebody could be around to tell you, “No Neve, you can’t just make up what you think others were thinking.” You know, stuff like that.

Just saying, bro.

*Was this a heist, really?

“A heist is a term used to describe a robbery from an institution such as a bank or a museum, or any robbery in which there is a large haul of loot.” Are you trying to minimize the importance of this crime, Neve? Like you’re a sarcastic public defender? I don’t think so. Oh well. 

**An application of science, simply put.

[UPDATE: The SFPD weigh in here:

San Francisco Police Arrest Cell Phone Thief with the Assistance of a Cab Driver
Posted Date: 8/2/2011
San Francisco Police arrested a man who committed a brazen robbery of a cell phone. In this incident, which occurred on 07/22/11 at around 7:10PM, a 27 year old victim was walking in the intersection of Polk and Francisco Streets. The suspect was seen coming up from behind the victim and forcefully grabbed the victim’s cell phone, which she was using and talking on at the time.

A courageous taxi cab driver, who happened to be at the corner parked, saw this occur. The cab was also equipped with a new camera technology system which captured the incident. This new technology records the front of the cab as well as the interior of the cab.

The cab driver pulled up to the victim and assisted the victim by having her get inside his cab and handed her his own cell phone to contact police. The victim gave police dispatchers the location of the suspect as the cab driver followed him. The suspect was subsequently taken into custody by police with the help of the cab driver and the victim.

The cab driver is to be commended for his actions, which helped police take a robbery suspect off the streets of San Francisco.

The police department will be presenting the cab driver with an award at the Police Commission meeting on Wednesday, August 3, 2011 honoring him for his assistance.

Taken into custody was Brandon C. West, 20 years old, San Francisco resident. He was booked for 211PC (robbery) at San Francisco County Jail.]

OMG, Today You Can Read Willie’s World For Free! Matier and Ross Too! Police Chief Gascon for DA?

Sunday, January 9th, 2011

The pay walls are all fall down today for Matier & Ross and Willie Brown at San Francisco Chronicle/SFGate, San Francisco’s Online Newspaper.


(Hey, does Willie have a heretofore unknown skin condition or something?)

Wonder if this is a one-time deal or a permanent, Mr. Gorbachev-tear-down-this-wall! kind of deal. You could say that these particular columns this week  might lose their effectiveness while waiting to get published but that’s true pretty much all of the time anyway, right?

And there’s blowback already:

Willie Brown has named 4 or 5 people as the “next San Francisco mayor” over the past several months–and none of them were Ed Lee.  Yet today Willie writes a self-congratulory column boasting Ed Lee was “noted here 1st”!  Yeah, sure, whatever you say, Willie. The truth is Willie wrote his prediction AFTER word had already started circulating thru San Francisco on local radio and other non-newspaper outlets about Ed Lee as next mayor.”

Oh well.

You know, I’m thinking the portrait photos used at the Chron are generally not meant to be seen 300 pixels wide. Speaking of former Mayors, check out this obscenely magenta “photo” / illustration / image the Chron uses:

(You’d be better off with a cell phone shot.*)

And speaking of the hair-gelled:

Anyway, the other news of the day is that frustrated San Francisco Police Chief George Gascon is a fully-licensed California attorney eligible to become our next District Attorney. Did not know that. (See below.) Thanks, M&R!

Hey, maybe the idea of having a paywall and a two-day publication delay for these columns was a bad idea?

Just asking, bro.

George Gascon – #182345

Bar Number: 182345

Address: San Francisco Police Dept, 850 Bryant St #525, San Francisco, CA 94103

Phone Number: (415) 553-1551
Fax Number: (415) 553-1554
e-mail: Not Available
County: San Francisco
Undergraduate School: California St Univ Long Beach; CA
District: District 4
Sections: None Law School: Western State Univ COL; Fullerton CA
Status History
Effective Date Status Change
Present Active
6/11/1996 Admitted to The State Bar of California
Explanation of member status
Actions Affecting Eligibility to Practice Law
Disciplinary and Related Actions
This member has no public record of discipline.
Administrative Actions
This member has no public record of administrative actions.”

*I don’t know where to begin with the issues this image has. A longer lens was called for, for starters. And the hair, what’s up with that? And here’s a tidbit: “90% of all you need to know is that you can never let the yellow % fall below magenta % on anyone’s skin unless you’re trying to show sunburn. Your camera may capture images with less yellow than magenta in skin; unfortunately, unless you fix it they won’t print without customers complaining. Nor will magazines accept them for publication.”