Now, I don’t recommend registering for the annual Bay to Breakers Fun Run and Street Party, cause what you’re pretty much doing is putting money into the pockets of a Colorado billionaire, who, in turn, puts money into the pockets of the anti-gay Yes on Prop 8 campaign.
But that’s how you roll, that’s fine.
But hey, look what they have for you this year – the Zazzle people sponsoring the 100th anniversary are going to monitor you during the race to see how much of your urine gets into a port-a-potty. And if you do well enough, then you’re going to get a garish, lime-green wristband. Hurray!
And, if you’re a straight, millionaire, white, wizened homeowner who moved into the Western Addition thinking it was something else (like Hayes Valley or “NoPA”), well urine luck. Look at this, free neon-pink lawn signs, you know, for your front lawn, the one you mow every Saturday morning along with all your neighbors.*
See how garish and San Mateo County there are? Hurray!
Here’s the email for the signs, but I’ll tell you, the nail that stands up gets hammered down and the duck that quacks gets shot, or something. Anyway, email@example.com.
All right, enjoy your street party on Sunday!
*Uh, the Western Addition is loaded with bossy old white people these days, sure, but front lawns? Not so much. Perhaps you should visit sometime, Zazzle, when you take a break from making things that nobody needs…