Posts Tagged ‘smartmeters’

San Francisco’s SFPark is Nothing But a Big FU to the 99% – Here’s Why Rich People Love the SFMTA’s New Program

Wednesday, February 15th, 2012

Do you know how long you can park at these new SFPark meters? Like four hours, baby. Just pop in your credit card.

Do you know who appreciates that? Rich people, the demographically-desirable who drive BMW’s and Mercedes Benzeseses.

Here’s five in a row. Thanks SFPARK!

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Here’s an exercise. Just as you can add “in bed” to your fortune cookie message, you can append the phrase “FOR RICH PEOPLE WITH MERCEDES AND BMW CARS” to any statement from the horrible SFPark people from the horrible SFMTA. Like this:

“SFMTA established SFpark to use new technologies and policies to improve parking in San Francisco FOR RICH PEOPLE WITH MERCEDES AND BMW CARS. Reducing traffic by helping RICH PEOPLE WITH MERCEDES AND BMW CARS find parking benefits RICH PEOPLE WITH MERCEDES AND BMW CARS. More parking availability makes streets less congested FOR RICH PEOPLE WITH MERCEDES AND BMW CARS. Meters that accept credit and debit cards FROM RICH PEOPLE WITH MERCEDES AND BMW CARS reduce frustration and parking citations FOR RICH PEOPLE WITH MERCEDES AND BMW CARS. With SFpark, RICH PEOPLE WITH MERCEDES AND BMW CARS can all circle less and live more.

SFpark works by collecting and distributing real-time information about where parking is available so RICH PEOPLE WITH MERCEDES AND BMW CARS can quickly find open spaces.

To help achieve the right level of parking availability FOR RICH PEOPLE WITH MERCEDES AND BMW CARS, SFpark periodically adjusts meter and garage pricing up and down to match demand FROM RICH PEOPLE WITH MERCEDES AND BMW CARS. Demand-responsive pricing encourages drivers to park in underused areas and garages, reducing demand (FROM POOR PEOPLE, THE 99%, THOSE FUCKERS) in overused (OVERUSED BY WHOM? BY POOR PEOPLE, THE 99%, THOSE FUCKERS) areas.

Through SFpark, real-time data and demand-responsive pricing work together to readjust parking patterns in the City so that parking is easier to find FOR RICH PEOPLE WITH MERCEDES AND BMW CARS”

On It Goes…

SFPark: “Let us “manage” your parking the same way we manage MUNI!”

SFPark: “Parking meters everywhere (eventually, including the entire Sunset District!) and for all (except for the specific whites of Pacific Heights). Hurray!”

Oh, Thank Goodness PG&E and the CPUC Will Let Me Pay to Opt Out of Getting a SmartMeter – Hurray!

Wednesday, April 6th, 2011

Now, one of these electricity meters four stories down is mine,* so of course I was extremely worried about the coming SmartMeter invasion.*

But now that I know that I can opt out of SmartMeters, I’m planning on spending hundreds or thousands of dollars to keep my old meter* (or get a new non-wireless meter, whatever.)

Can you imagine? I’ll certainly sleep better at night* knowing that I’ve played a role in reducing the non-ionizing radiation coming from the garage downstairs by about 2% during the few minutes a day that SmartMeters emit anything at all!

That means I’ll have more time to fret about all the other radiation sources what are killing me.

Hurray!*

*Not really

Don’t Bother Attacking the Installation Workers, SmartMeters are Already Here in San Francisco

Friday, January 21st, 2011

See? Despite what the headlines say, they’re here right now. They’ve been radiating away in town for so long they’re dusty and stuff. And you haven’t died yet, right?

Remember when Arnold Schwarzenegger wanted to bend the rules in order to spray you with chemicals from the air in order to fight the Light Brown Apple Moth in order to protect some industry that you don’t give a whit about? Well, that was a different situation, we can talk about that sometime.

But SmartMeters, they can’t hurt you. Yes, even you, even if you are “especially sensitive” to SmartMeters.

So don’t throw yourself in front of the fleet of trucks coming down Lombard or anything. You should allow the installation workers to come onto your propertah, cause, you know, you have nothing to fear.

And if anybody tells you any different, they are, best case scenario, patronizing you

As seen in San Francisco back in 2010, broadcasting your private personal information about how much of the G in PG&E you’ve been using. The ‘lectricity SmartMeters look a little  different:

Jack DAngelo likes:

When they knock on your front door
How you gonna come?
With your hands on your head
Or on the trigger of your gun?

Turns Out that Wireless PG&E SmartMeters WON’T Kill You – Imagine That!

Wednesday, January 12th, 2011

If I thought there were a chance in Hell that you could possibly be hurt by microwave RF radiation from a PG&E SmartMeter, I might feel differently about this whole issue.

Anyway, you all wanted a study, so you got a study, right?

As seen on Van Ness:

So, if you want to fight the Battle of New Orleans, be my guest.

But this one is case closed…

Next!

PG&E is Going All Out to Get You to Loooooove SmartMeters – Testing Old Meters Side-By-Side

Tuesday, August 31st, 2010

I’m not exactly sure what you people are worried about with the new SmartMeters from our corporate overlords at Pigs, Giraffes, and Elephants. One issue is radiation. Really? Can a frequency make you sick?

“Hart says the electromagnetic frequency, the EMF, which is used to remotely send information from the SmartMeter on the side of your home to PG&E can make people sick.”

I don’t think so, pardner. Anyway, concerns persist over the electromagnetic fields surrounding these rigs. So, PG&E is taking steps today to make sure you get all the paliative cliches you can handle. Read all about what they’re going to do after the jump.

Now, the other issue people seem to have is meter accuracy. So, get ready for the Old vs. New side-by-side test results.

Some Californians have two meters metering just to prove that SmartMeters work:

Seems pretty close to me but, as always, You Make The Call:

Data ending 8/10/2010
Data ending 8/3/2010
Data ending 7/27/2010
Data ending 7/20/2010
View results archive

All right, all the deets of SmartMeter Best Practices after the jump. 

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Are We Now Supposed to Worry About Radiation from PG&E SmartMeters?

Tuesday, July 20th, 2010

This was the scene today at Van Ness and McAllister (where a passing San Francisco Supervisor went out of his/her way to state that he/she was not involved). It was the great anti-PG&E, anti-SmartMeter protest at the California Public Utilities Commission.

Anyway, the answer is this:

No, don’t worry about RF radiation from Smart Meters.

Worry about something else if you want, though. Be my guest.   

Nice sign, but…

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