Remind me again why we subsidize Telsa Motors?
Via iPhone 5 owner – click to expand
Posts Tagged ‘tesla’
Silicon Valley Photobook: Google’s Sergey Brin in Google Glass Driving a Pink Tesla Model S Batmobile at LinkedIn HQ
Friday, April 5th, 2013Here’s One Problem, Just One Problem, With Tesla Motors’ Buyback Scheme: High Mercedes S Class Depreciation
Tuesday, April 2nd, 2013Here’s the news of the day:
“Working with some of the largest and most respected banks in the country, Tesla has been able to create a financing product that combines the surety and comfort of ownership with all the advantages of a traditional lease.
US Bank and Wells Fargo will provide 10% down financing assuming a good credit rating, and the down payment is covered or more than covered by US Federal and state tax credits ranging from $7,500 to $15,000. New Jersey, Washington and DC also have no sales tax for electric vehicles. These advantages are not available when leasing.
After 36 months, you have the right, but not the obligation to sell your Model S to Tesla for the same residual value percentage as the iconic Mercedes S Class, one of the finest premium sedans in the world, made by Daimler (also a Tesla partner and investor).
Not only is Tesla guaranteeing that resale value, but Tesla CEO Elon Musk is personally standing behind that guarantee to give customers absolute peace of mind about the value of the asset they are purchasing.
We also encourage you to think about Model S ownership in terms of true out of pocket cost. When considering the savings from using electricity instead of gasoline, depreciation benefits, and other factors, buyers will save hundreds of dollars per month compared to owning a gasoline powered car.”
The problem with this, or rather, one of the problems with this, is that Mercedes Benz S-Class cars have horrible resale value.
Just horrible!
So if Elon Musk really wants to put his money where his mouth is, why doesn’t he use cars more desirable and practical for the residual value percentage guarantee?
How about the Nissan Versa or Honda Fit?
Just askin’.
Once Again, Tesla Motors CEO Elon Musk Proves Himself Wrong Over the Shortcomings of the Expensive Model S
Wednesday, February 20th, 2013Let’s check in on troubled Tesla Motors’ troubled CEO, Elon Musk.
Here he is – please try to guess which photo here has Photoshopped footwear. It’s not easy:
You see, ’cause one’s a joke and the other, well, the other’s kind of a joke as well.
Oh well.
First of all, let’s examine the appropriate number of kids to have with a woman a’fore trading her in on a new model.
In Elon’s case, that number is five.
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Five kids.
Then bam, you move on.
If you’re Elon.
And what does your first wife say to all this? She’s all, well at least Elon’s new gal isn’t a blonde.*
Cause you see, that would fit the profile of a stereotypical messianic middle-aged asshole CEO-type to a T.
Which rhymes with T (sort of).
Which stands for Trouble, Tesla, and The Times.
So let’s see, from the mouth of the horse, or jack-ass, your pick:
“NYTimes article about Tesla range in cold is fake. Vehicle logs tell true story that he didn’t actually charge to max & took a long detour.”
Well, as discussed here, that bit in the NYT (instigated by Tesla to show off its branded power stations) had issues.
But was it fake?
NO, NOT AT ALL.
So you were wrong, Elon.
And oh what’s that, you have the logs from the car, but not GPS data or recordings from Tesla Customer Service?
Isn’t that kind of funny?
And Elon, how much range should your six-figure car lose after parking it overnight when it’s cold?
What’s the appropriate amount?
And Elon, isn’t your Model S sort of a ridiculous vehicle being big on the outside (longer AND wider than an eight-passenger Toyota Land Cruiser) and small on the inside?
And Elon, didn’t you promise you’d deliver 5000 vehicles last year?
And are going to meet that goal? I don’t think so.
You see, a normal person would feel bad about breaking a promise.
Do you feel bad sometimes, you know, when all those things you’ve said would happen don’t actually happen, you know, actually and IRL?
I don’t know.
And oh, there’s this:
“Detail showing car driving around in circles in front of the Milford Supercharger trying to get Model S to stop.”
Would you like to correct that one, Elon?
Didn’t think so.
Hey Elon, if you’re so rich and confident, why don’t you use your own money to fund Tesla?
Hey Elon, if you’re so rich and confident, why don’t you guarantee the loan guarantee you worked out with the feds?
You know, so the taxpayers’ half a billion dollars wouldn’t be at risk.
So here’s your lesson, Elon:
Elon Musk and How Not to Handle a PR Crisis.
See how that works?
So this is wrong:
“Yesterday, The New York Times reversed its opinion on the review of our Model S…”
Why don’t you correct yourself, Elon?
Oh, here’s somebody who’s not wedded to the idea of Tesla being the greatest corporation evah:
“John Markoff @markoff Excuse me Elon, but Margaret Sullivan does not speak for the NYT. Distortion to say the NYT “reversed.”
Oh Elon, will you ever win?
(And please pay back our money soon, m’kay? ‘Cause we’re still out for Solyndra ‘n stuff.)
*At least you didn’t shoot her through the bathroom door four times, srsly.
Who Killed the Electric Car (Again)? Tesla CEO Elon Musk Did – “Stalled Out on Tesla’s Electric Highway”
Tuesday, February 12th, 2013Vaunted Tesla Motors’ vaunted Model S sedan getting towed at the end of a New York Times test drive:
Click to expand
Oh Elon Musk, will you ever win?
Oh Elon Musk, your jackassery actually hurts the industry you’re trying to promote.
Oh Tesla CEO and media criticElon Musk, don’t you yourself burn far, far more petroleum than the average American? Like you get a loan from the taxpayers and a good chunk of that money goes to paying your aviation fuel costs, to the tune of hundreds of thousands of dollars?
Isn’t it ironic?
Dont’cha think?
Read the news and turn the pages/
Watch them play a different game/
And [soon enough] no one knows your name
Look at that S-Car Go! Comments Re: Today’s Bit on “Electric Cars” in the Chronicle – EL CHEVY VOLT NO ES UN COCHE ELECTRICO
Wednesday, March 21st, 2012“After a year’s success in casting bankrupt Fremont solar maker Solyndra as the prototype for President Obama’s energy policies, Republicans now are targeting what they have dubbed “Obamacars.”
OBAMACARS? THAT’S A NEW ONE ON ME. PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA INDEED HAS A PROBLEM ON HIS HANDS WITH THE VERY UNPOPULAR DETROIT BAILOUT. I’M NOT SAYING IT WAS HIS IDEA BUT HE CERTAINLY SUPPORTED IT AND IT WAS BAD IDEA, IMO. FOR SOME REASON, HAVING SOMETHING TO DO WITH OBAMA, GM MADE WILDLY UNREALISTIC FORECASTS FOR THE VOLT PLUG-IN HYBRID. OBVIOUSLY, THERE’S GOOD AND BAD FOR OBAMA TO BE SO INVOLVED WITH DETROIT.
For some GOP members of Congress, the Chevy Volt, made by General Motors, is a fire hazard and a job loser, while Palo Alto’s Tesla Motors is a crony capitalist purveyor of toy cars for Silicon Valley millionaires.
FIRE HAZARD? NO. JOB LOSER? NO. BUT CRONY CAPITALIST PURVEYOR OF TOY CARS FOR SILICON VALLEY MILLIONAIRES? YES! DING DING DING!
The campaign has tainted Energy Secretary and UC Berkeley physicist Steven Chu and his agency’s renewable energy loan programs, rupturing a consensus under former President George W. Bush, who started the programs to end America’s addiction to oil.
I DON’T KNOW IF THE CAMPAIGN DID THAT. WE’VE WASTED A LOT OF MONEY ON A LOT OF FEDERAL PROGRAMS – THIS IS TRUE WITH OR WITHOUT ANY CAMPAIGN.
But it may not stop the electric car. The assault has enraged General Motors. On March 1, the company opened an unprecedented campaign to re-introduce the Volt in California, the biggest U.S. auto market, even as it temporarily halted production because of slow sales.
THE CHEVY VOLT IS NOT AN “ELECTRIC CAR.” SORRY. IT’S A PLUG-IN HYBRID, IRL.
GM Chief Executive Officer Dan Akerson has complained about the political atmosphere that surrounds the Volt.
UH, DOESN’T HE OWE HIS JOB TO THE “POLITICAL ATMOSPHERE?” I THINK SO.
“Sometimes I feel bad for President Obama,” he said this month after an appearance at the Commonwealth Club in San Francisco.
AWW. AND SOMETIMES SMITHERS FEELS BAD FOR MR. BURNS. SOMETIMES.
The automaker accused Republicans and the media of hyping claims that the car caught fire during testing, which forced temporary layoffs at the Volt plant in Detroit.
IF THE VOLT WERE WAAAAAY CHEAPER, IT WOULD SELL SOMEWHAT BETTER. THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH NEWS OF FIRES. GM, FOR POLITICAL REASONS, WAS WAAAAAAAY OFF ON PREDICTIONS OF SALES FOR THIS MODEL.
Tesla, which received a $465 million Department of Energy loan, has dropped pursuit of new federal loans, raised private cash and plans in July to start deliveries of its $50,000 S car, claiming it is on its way to the mass car market.
LOOK AT THAT S CAR GO! OR YOU COULD CALL IT THE TYPE S, AS TESLA DOES. AND HOW ABOUT $57,400 FOR THE BASE PRICE OF THE STRIPPER MODEL S, YOU KNOW, INSTEAD OF “$50,000?”
“We applied during the Bush administration, and we were approved under the Obama administration, so as far as we’re concerned, we at least had a bipartisan relationship for the loan,” said Tesla spokesman Ricardo Reyes. “We got one of first loans and we used it to build the car that is now going into production in a U.S.-based facility. … I’d like to think we’re pretty much a case study on what the loan program was designed to do.”
THE FEDS SHOULD NOT HAVE PUT ANY MONEY INTO TESLA. SORRY.
Showing photos of a charred Volt, a panel of the House Government Reform and Oversight Committee, chaired by Rep. Darrell Issa, R-Vista (San Diego County), held a hearing in January called “Volt Vehicle Fire: What Did NHTSA Know and When Did They Know It.”
NOW WE’RE INTO THE POLITICS. BUT I THINK ELEMENTS OF THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION PLAY THE EXACT SAME GAME, RIGHT?
“Without a doubt, the antics have hurt sales, which has probably contributed to the need to shut down the plant for a few weeks and temporarily lay off 1,300 employees,” said GM spokesman Shad Balch. “It’s just blatantly wrong information. You get some of these folks on national news shows making outrageous statements about batteries catching on fire and cars randomly exploding.”
THE “BLATANTLY WRONG INFORMATION” ABOUT THE VOLT MOSTLY COMES FROM GM. MOSTLY. THE VOLT IS AN UNPOPULAR CAR. DEAL WITH IT, GM. WHAT IF THERE WERE A HEARING SOMEWWHERE IN DC ABOUT EXPLODING APPLE IPADS? DO YOU ALL THINK THAT WOULD MAKE THE IPAD AN UNPOPULAR PRODUCT ALL OF A SUDDEN? THE EXPENSIVE VOLT IS THE EXPENSIVE VOLT. DEAL WITH IT.
An independent analyst at TrueCar.com, a new-vehicle pricing and research firm, said what is slowing Volt sales is GM’s failure to tout its economics as gasoline prices soar past $4 a gallon.
TRUECAR.COM IS A BIG POS OF A WEBSITE. WHY IS IT BEING CITED IN THIS FASHION?
The Energy Department’s loan programs have been plagued by politicization, bankruptcies and bureaucratic bungling.
OH, HEY. HEY, THAT SHOULD BE THE HEADLINE. NOW YOU’RE ON THE TROLLEY!
Electric car maker Fiskar Automotive of Anaheim, which produces the luxury Karma in Finland and is aiming to produce a mass market “Project Nina” car in the United States, was approved for a $529 million loan guarantee. But it has drawn down just $193 million and was blocked in May by the Energy Department from further disbursements for failure to meet project milestones. It has stopped work at its Delaware plant.
WHAT A FIASCO. WHY DO WE GIVE MONEY TO CARMAKERS?
Toprak of Truecar.com said the 18,000 electric cars sold in the United States last year, mostly the Volt and the Nissan Leaf, make up just one-tenth of 1 percent of new car sales.
TO REPEAT, THE VOLT IS NOT AN “ELECTRIC CAR.” REPETICION: EL CHEVY VOLT NO ES UN COCHE ELECTRICO. IT WAS GOING TO BE, BUT THEN THINGS CHANGED.
OH WELL>
What the Chevy Volt looked like back when it really was an electric car. As seen on Market Street in San Francisco back in 2008:
Later on they added in a gas engine and they made it look lame and then they jacked up the price waaaaaay high.
Oh well.
That’s GM for you…
National Transportation Safety Board Holds Tesla Automotive Employee Responsible for Fatal Air Crash in Palo Alto
Monday, November 28th, 2011(As always, If You Assume That Any Given Plane Crash is Due to Pilot Error, You’ll Probably Be Right.)
Here’s an article about the new NTSB report.
Does it make sense to commute to Los Angeles for work, assuming you had a pilot’s license and an airplane? I don’t know.
Does it make sense to listen to the advice of your air traffic controller concerning the advisability of taking off into heavy fog, even if you don’t have to? Yes it does.
Is there a reason why pilots are told to turn over the Bay after takeoff? Yes there is.
Oh well.
Here’s what people down Palo Alto Way are saying.
And here‘s the “chilling recording” from a SpotShotter tower. (It’s about what you’d expect, with crashing noises and the yelling of the day care center kids who saw the crash.)
The former N5225J, a Cessna 310R with relatively new, perfectly-fine-at-the-time engines:
(I’ll tell you, I don’t know why our federal government subsidizes Tesla Automotive (and for that matter, General Monkeybusiness in Detroit). Was Tesla paying for the avgas that this Cessna was burning? Does Tesla reimburse CEO Elon Musk for the jet fuel that he burns as he joyrides around the world, as is his wont? I think Tesla used to, but I don’t know about these days. You know, for an electric car company what’s produced not a whole bunch of electric cars, Tesla seems to burn up a lot of petroleum…)
Anyway, here’s the summary – the whole thing you’ll find after the jump.
“NTSB Identification: WPR10FA136
14 CFR Part 91: General Aviation
Accident occurred Wednesday, February 17, 2010 in Palo Alto, CA
Probable Cause Approval Date: 11/22/2011
Aircraft: CESSNA 310R, registration: N5225J
Injuries: 3 Fatal.
The pilot departed the airport in near-zero visibility instrument meteorological conditions, and shortly after takeoff, struck a power pole and power lines before impacting terrain. Review of recorded air traffic control tower (ATCT) transmissions revealed that the pilot was initially given his instrument flight rules (IFR) clearance to turn right to a heading of 060 degrees and climb to 3,000 feet. Shortly after verifying his IFR clearance, the pilot received his IFR release from the ATCT controller and was informed that the runway was not visible to the controller. The controller further informed the pilot that takeoff was at his own risk. Shortly after, the controller notified the pilot that he had two minutes for his IFR release, before it expired. The pilot stated that he did not hear a “cleared for takeoff” instruction from the controller. The controller responded that he could not clear the pilot for takeoff, due to not having the runway environment in sight and that “the release is all yours and it’s at your own risk sir.” The pilot acknowledged the transmission and proceeded to take off. One witness, who was adjacent to the accident site, reported that she observed an airplane “suddenly appear from the fog” left of her position. The witness stated that she continued to watch the airplane fly in a level or slightly nose up attitude until it impacted power lines.
Accident site evidence was indicative of a level impact with a power pole about 50 feet above ground level (agl) and at a high airspeed. All major structural components of the airplane were located within the wreckage debris path. Examination of the airframe, engines and propellers disclosed no evidence of any preimpact mechanical anomaly. Weather conditions reported five minutes prior to the accident were wind variable at 5 knots, visibility 1/8th mile, fog, and vertical visibility of 100 feet agl. Weather conditions recorded by the ATCT 11 minutes after the time of the accident were visibility 1/16th mile, fog, and a vertical visibility of 100 feet agl.
Local law enforcement provided recordings from a sound recording system, which captured the accident sequence. The recordings were coupled with airport surveillance radar to interpolate a flightpath for the airplane. The interpolated flightpath indicated an approximate 45-degree left turn shortly after departure to the area of initial impact with the power pole and power lines. A sound spectrum study determined both engines were operating near full power.
The National Transportation Safety Board determines the probable cause(s) of this accident as follows:
The pilot’s failure follow the standard instrument departure as instructed, and his failure to attain a sufficient altitude to maintain clearance from power lines during takeoff in instrument meteorological conditions.”
The 2011 San Francisco International Auto Show at Huge Success at Moscone Center – Mini Cooper Coupe, Scion IQ
Friday, November 25th, 2011Our San Francisco International Auto Show runs through Sunday, November 27th, 2011 down at Moscone Center.
See hundreds of photos of this year’s show courtesy of Eric Broder Van Dyke.
That’s Fisker Automotive down there on the left. They make the Karma hybrid car. (Half a decade ago, Fisker competitor Tesla Automotive had this very space, but they’ve run into trouble since then and they were nowhere to be seen in 2011):
This is the second thing you’ll see as you descend from Howard Street:
From the Academy of Art University (“the Art School of Art Schools”) collection:
Isn’t it cute?
It’s a 1959 Autobiancho Bianchina Transformabile, “the rich man’s Fiat 500.”
Lot’s of nostalgia on hand this year, as per usual:
Classic 1965 Ford Mustang pool table with working headlights:
Here’s your Best in Show #1, the 2012 MINI John Cooper Works Coupe:
All the deets:
A huge Nissan something or other:
The American Pride Camaro:
Here’s the Aftermarket Avenue. Why would you need even one flat panel TV in your trunk?
Oh look, Tesla Automotive makes gasoline-powered cars now! These Lotus cars are shorter and lighter than those failed Tesla Roadsters, so handling is probably much better. Oh, they’re a lot cheaper to boot:
Does your Rolls Royce convertible have suicide doors? If not, why not?
Toyota will slam your Prius hybrid these days. What’s next, a factory chop and channel job?
And here’s your other Best in Show, the Scion IQ 3+1. That 3+1 means that the seat behind the driver has zero legroom, basically, but the seat behind the front passenger is roomy owing to the front passenger seat being mounted closer to the windshield than the driver’s seat. Check it:
See you there!
Nissan Celebrates Delivering Its 6500th Electric Car – That’s More Than Tesla, CODA, and Solyndra Combined
Monday, September 26th, 2011During the time period that people from the disappointing Tesla Motors and CODA Automotive electric car “producers” were criticizing the design of the Nissan LEAF, Nissan simply worked hard to become the first mass-producer of electric cars.*
Of course, 6500 units over the past nine months might not sound like a whole bunch to you, but that’s more than what the vaunted Tesla,** CODA, and Solyndra*** have delivered altogether.
(The case from CODA against the LEAF can be found right here. Oh, and you can find Tesla fanboys celebrating the disruptive Northern Japan Earthquake and Tsunami right here.)
Presenting the Nissan LEAF. Adorable, huh?
Click to expand
Heh, what a burn:
“6,500 no-gas Nissan LEAFs™ have now been delivered to excited owners. Across the country each day, new drivers are getting to enjoy the Nissan LEAF™. And as the first and only car manufacturer to mass-produce 100% electric cars, it’s clear that Nissan is 6,500 steps ahead of the pack.”
Ahead of the pack, baby.
You see, Nissan delivers while the others merely promise delivery. In CODA’s case the same basic car has been promised every year since 2007 and in Tesla’s I think it’s similarly been years since Tesla was supposed to have delivered the follow-up to that ridiculous Roadster, you know the car that got an airbag waiver from the feds cause Tesla said it would go out of business if it had to follow the rules that a manufacturer like, I don’t know, Nissan has to follow when it builds a car like, I don’t know, the LEAF.
Anyway, you’ll have to keep waiting for a Tesla Model S.
But don’t let me stop you from writing a check right now for $50k**** for a CODA Sedan, direct from China via Benicia.
Go for it, see if I care.
Oh hey, Nissan’s Drive Electric Tour is coming back soon. Sign up now, if you want:
San Francisco
11.18.2011 – 11.20.2011
11.25.2011 – 11.27.2011
Hurray!
*In the past century or so – somebody else might have been churning out BEVs back in the day. I don’t know how many old-school electric cars were mass-produced back in the late 1800s and early 1900s.
**You know how much kerosene Tesla Motors has bought for its globe-trotting CEO? My guess would be hundreds of thousands of dollars worth, by this point. Isn’t it ironic, don’tcha think?
*** Oh, I guess Solyndra didn’t even try to make cars. Oh well. Tell me, is there an issue with “ced[ing] the solar panel industry to China?” I mean, who cares if China builds solar panels?
****Including delivery and use tax, no negotiating! I think that you’ll have to pay normal purchase and registration fees for the CODA, but I’m not sure since I’ve heard that the state of CA waived these charges for some Tesla purchasers…
Electric Car Update: First Privately-Owned Nissan Leaf Sighted on the Streets of San Francisco
Tuesday, August 30th, 2011Remember this:
Everybody associated with electric car companies thinks it’s OK to lie to you. All of them.
OTOH, Nissan is not an electric car company, so not everything they say is spun into a lie. Isn’t that refreshing?
As here, where Nissan said it would deliver the LEAF last year and it did.*
(And, of course, the haterz at poorly-performing Tesla and CODA and others defunct and not-yet-defunct are still hating**)
It’s taken a while, all of 2011 so far to be exact, for me to see a LEAF in the wild and not as a part of a Nissan event.
See?
Click to expand
Now, can I ask why Mayor Ed Lee has a gas-powered plug-in hybrid from Government Motors instead of an all-electric Nissan Leaf? (The answer might have something to do with the feds kicking in for half of the cost of Ed Lee’s Chevy Volt, and the power of the UAW, and the fact that people at City Hall thought it was an actual electric car. Oh well.)
Anyway, here’s your number one City runabout, garage definitely required.
*I think it was just five units delivered, which was less than Nissan thought it would do for 2010, but by the standards of the industry this is exemplary performance.
**It was a guy from CODA who said that “housewives” wouldn’t “feel comfortable” in the LEAF, you know, cause it’s so weird-looking, basically. He made this statement while inside a warmed-over electrified Mitsubishi (Carisma, aka CODA Sedan) straight outta 1996, ironically.
Tesla Motors CEO Elon Musk is Bigger Than Jesus AND the Beatles, Per the San Francisco Business Times, Apparently
Tuesday, April 19th, 2011The San Francisco Business Times has seen fit to update us about Tesla Motors CEO Elon Musk in just four pithy grafs. Hurray!
By the numbers:
1. Can you guess which organ from his body is especially large? (Give it a try – it’s fun!)
2. Electric motors* have “crazy torque” because of Sainted Elon Musk the Divine Creator, the “Chief Product Architect” of Life and not because of the Laws of the Universe or Intelligent Design or the Blessings of Gaia the Earth Goddess or anything like that.
3. NASA sux, compared to Elon, anyway. ‘Nough said.
4. E.M. must have ”some cold fusion battery** powering him that makes him also way smarter” than All of God’s Chil’ren. (Including you, Gentle Reader.)
So, this is how the San Francisco Business Times sees Elon…
…and this is how I*** see him. (Can you imagine – his ex-wife gave birth to just five(!) of his kids while he went out and did all the work. And his ex-partner / co-Founder at Tesla Motors, well that guy let Elon the Man-Child down as well. Oh, we are not worthy, Elon, nobody else but you is Worthy, Elon!)
Take your pick.
Regardless, All Hail Elon Musk!
*Now, you can call an engine a motor but not the other way ’round. Truth. “In common usage, an engine burns or otherwise consumes fuel, and is differentiated from an electric machine (i.e., electric motor) that derives power without changing the composition of matter.”
**Uuuuuuuuh… no comment.
***Actually, ’tis I what owns a pair of pink Crocs, size XXL, $14.97 from Costco back in the day. (Think this is called “projection” or something…)
