Posts Tagged ‘thieves’

The Scariest Acronym Possible to the Mail Thieves of Haight Ashbury? “CCTV,” Apparently – One Weird Trick!

Monday, June 15th, 2015

Picture the scene – you’re a junkie fixing to steal a little mail from Yet Another Millionaire Homeowner in the 94117. You slowly lift the little door only to see this: CCTV.

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Oh no! Closed Circuit Tele Vision – run away, run away!

(That’s the only way you can see these letters. That or, maybe, Clayton Station 94117 has loaded your box so much that the door will no longer close – that’s the other way of seeing this message.)

Does this technique scare off hoodied junkies?

I know not.

Open-Air Bicycle Chop-Shop, 13th Street – These are Just a Few of the Hundreds of Stolen Bikes on Division, 13th, and Duboce Ave

Wednesday, February 25th, 2015

Chop chop, always with the chopping, in this area:

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If your bike hasn’t yet gotten chopped and it has a serial number on it, then there’s something the cops can do about it.

Otherwise, chop chop, always with the chopping, in this area.

Back up in the hood where the rules dont shift
And the gangstas talk trills, sip purp and burn piff
You can call 5-0 and 5-0 might come
But by the time that they arrive all that dirt had been done

Whole Foods Stanyan Street in the Upper Haight: A Good Place to Shop, Perhaps, But a Bad Place to Park Your Bike

Monday, December 1st, 2014

Man, quick-release skewers ought to be banned for sale in San Francisco…

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APAWToMV! The Attractive Pensive Alleged Watch Thieves of Mountain View, CA – Not the Best Photo, But Good Enough for an ID

Monday, October 6th, 2014

I’m thinking this Bay Area woman will be ID’ed for the Mountain Police Department in about five minutes

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Tracking That Stolen Bike Owned by The Today Show: From The Mission to the Mid-Market to 1729 McKinnon Ave in The Bayview

Thursday, September 4th, 2014

I’ll tell you, I actually got around to watching that five-minute clip from the Today Show about bike thieves in the West Coast Capital of Bike Thievery, San Francisco.

And I says, “1729, huh?” You see, that was the street address on the front door that that Today Show guy knocked on. And they showed the street itself, so I guessed a 94124 zip code and then excluded the first two hits (1729 Geneva and 1729 Sunnydale because they both didn’t make sense) by making this Google search: “-Geneva -Sunnydale 94124 1729 .”

And, lo, up pops 1729 McKinnon in the Lower Third:

Captured

It’s sort of funny how the bike thief made a bee-line to the Thieves Market at Civic Center – that’s what you could see when they showed the GPS track. Anyway, the next stop was a shed in the Bayview.

SF, you have a problem with bike theft – deal with it. Like, it’s national news, literally.

NBC’s Today Show Dedicates Five Minutes to Bike Theft – Ed Lee’s San Francisco a National Laughingstock – Video

Wednesday, September 3rd, 2014

Our little town, second-largest in the Bay Area, got some national attention yesterday. See the video below.

Do you think appointed Interim Mayor Ed Lee knows about it? IDK. Prolly not, as he’s being pressured to raise more money to run for reelection and his people probably don’t have reason to tell him.

Anyway, enjoy:

“TODAY   |  September 02, 2014

Rossen Reports: Bike bandits caught on camera
According to the FBI, nearly 200,000 bikes are stolen every year. To show how quickly it can happen, NBC national investigative correspondent Jeff Rossen and his team locked a bike to a tree in San Francisco and not only captured its theft on camera, but followed it on its journey after being stolen.”

Poor Ed Lee.

Poor San Francisco.

Bicycle Thieves Under the I-80 – Ineffectual Mayor Ed Lee Powerless – An Industry That “Employs” Hundreds

Thursday, August 21st, 2014

On It Goes…

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Day In…

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…and Day Out.

Here’s some of the inventory:

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Some bike thieves are homeless and some aren’t. I mean, if you have an unregistered RV filled with stolen bicycles, are you homeless? IDK.

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Some are quite industrious:

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And comical:

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Oh no, we’ve headed too far to the west, so we’re out of the chop shop zone:

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If you want to see for yourself, start at Costco and then head west under the freeway…

OMG, the San Francisco Police Officers Association is Giving Away Kryptonite Bike Locks – Bicycle Theft Workshop at the Twitter Building March 13th

Friday, February 21st, 2014

Pretty much:

“1st 45 people who bring an old cable lock to SAFE Bikes event will get a new @kryptonitelock u-lock! http://www.safebikes.org/events.html  @SFPDBikeTheft

Check it:

But they have a few questions for you:










OK fine, but the Twitter Office isn’t all that exciting. Consider it a victory if they let you out onto the roof.

Oh and it it looks like the San Francisco Bicycle Coalition has nothing to do with this event, except for parking bikes out front. Mmmm.

Anyway, enjoy.

Free Potting Soil from Golden Gate Park, If You’re Brash Enough to Just Come and Steal It

Tuesday, November 12th, 2013

You can sort of make out the culprits on the other side of this mound:

Or maybe this sort of thing is cool, IDK.

Anyway, the soil looked extra loamy, so that must have been a bonus for the thieves.

Here’s a Detailed Report of the Big SFPD-Google Bike Theft Workshop – 720 Stolen in the Mission Per Year

Thursday, December 13th, 2012

Not from me, oh no, but from PlattyJo.com, aka Jenny Oh Hatfield, who just nuts about bikes.

Here it is

Does this count as a bike theft? I’d say so:

Click to expand