Posts Tagged ‘thin’

“Lean In” vs. Just Plain-Old Lean – Sheryl Sandberg’s Vaunted New-School Stock Photo Collection Kind of Looks Old-School

Thursday, February 20th, 2014

Work with me here, people.

“Getty Images dumps cliched stock photos for new ‘Lean In Collection.’ Getty Images in partnership with Lean In has launched the ‘Lean In Collection’ of stock photos, replacing the cliched, sterilized images of women and girls we have come to see on everything from billboards to magazine ads.”

Be my guest if you want to buy expensive “Lean In” brand photos, by all means.

Oh look, here’s one now, from the first page:

Creative (RF) #186678755

Click to expand

OK fine.

Oh, in closing, (pronounced with two syllables in a sing-song voice): “‘Shopped”

Outrageousness: Eighth-Generation Buick Riviera on Conestoga Wheels – What are These, Twenty-Eight Inchers?

Thursday, November 15th, 2012

The secret is to make your super-tall aftermarket wheels thin, the better to allow your whip to, you know, turn left and right:

Click to expand

Conestoga Wagon Wheel Fever – Catch It

And the Award for America’s Thinnest Big-City Newspaper Goes To … Today’s San Francisco Examiner, June 4, 2012

Monday, June 4th, 2012

Boy, I’ll tell you, today’s San Francisco Examiner is like really thin.

[Call and response] “HOW THIN IS IT?!”

It’s so thin that just one ad composes ten percent of it. I’m srlsy.

I don’t know, are they taking pulp out of the newsprint to save money? Sure feels that way. Today’s issue is super thin, even for an Examiner.

But at least the advertisers are better than before. So there’s no “Platinum Gas Saver” scam on page 3, like before. And the super-jumbo horoscope is gone, so that’s nice.

In their place are ads for the Dolan Law Firm (heh), and “Real Hook Ups Real Fast (Ahora en Espanol, 18+), and “ATTENTION MEN” with an offer of a “Test Dose of Medication, to prove it works* in 10 minutes”

OK fine.

But no matter.

I’ll still pick up a copy of the ‘Xam every day.

Religiously.

*Uh, are there really medical offices way up at the 1700 block of Montgomery, deep in NIMBY territory? I guess there are. And then you take the “test dose” and wait ten minutes to see how your wiener reacts while listening to the Wild Parrots of Telegraph Hill? Sign me up!

If the San Francisco Examiner’s New Years Resolution was to become Thinner and Sexier in 2012, Well, Mission Accomplished

Thursday, January 5th, 2012

Uh, hey, has the San Francisco Examiner gotten, I don’t know, a lot thinner recently?

Oh yes.

And does it have, I don’t know, sexier photos?

Oh yes.

Here’s yesterday’s 20-page effort, or ten percent of it, anyway. An almost full-page horoscope and a giant precious metals ad. Hurray!

Click to expand

Uh, could it be that last year’s Phillip Anschutz-owned Examiner was a better read than this year’s Examiner?

I mean, I saw the national editorial stuff in there all the time but I just scanned right through it, it didn’t bother me, I didn’t care.

But at least I had something else to read.

A couple of times recently I turned the pages of the New Examiner seven or so times thinking, seen it, seen it, horoscope, precious metals ad, and then that was it.

Mmmmmm….

Courage.

OMG, the New “Google Offers” from Google is Just Like GroupOn, Except It’s for Places You Like: 50% Off of Little Star Pizza!

Monday, July 25th, 2011

Remember back in the day, when Little Star Pizza had a GroupOn type of 50% off deal?

Well, that one didn’t last long – sold out with a quickness.

But now, a similar deal is back, courtesy of Google Offers.

See?

Note that this if for Early Birds only, so you’ll need to be seated by 6:30 PM. (Little Stars are busy enough during prime-time dinner hours already, right?)

Hurray!

Also, Hurry! As this deal won’t last long.

So far, all of the other deals offered by Google Offers since it began in San Francisco have been good as well.

Like this:

Now, you know Little Star, right?

Western Addition 846 Divisadero St.

Mission District 400 Valencia St.

Albany 1175 Solano Ave

(Little Star is now in Albany? Wonder what the Zachary’s people think of that?)

Bon Courage Google Offers!

Bon Courage Peu D’Etoile!

Sorry H&M, Nobody’s Arms are This Slender – Try a Little Less Photoshop Next Time, Huh?

Monday, November 22nd, 2010

I don’t know, I’m not sure of the point of stretching out arms, thusly.

As seen in the Western Addition:

Click to expand

Of course, when stretching things out, it pays to pay attention:

Else you’ll get yet another Photoshop Disaster: