The San Francisco Citizen

Check it out - right in front of the University of San Francisco’s Malfoy Hall (where Draco and Lucius got their MBA’s) are two parking spaces where you may park forever. That’s right, no two, three, or four hour neighborhood parking limit but also no street sweeping hours either.

Just down the hill, you have to move your car on Wednesdays, and just up the hill you have to move your car on Mondays. Just consider these spaces on Fulton your own personal open-air garage.

Just check it occasionally to see if it’s been tagged for violating the rarely-enforced California 72-hour parking law and you are good to go.

Finally, the little guy gets a break!

That could be the only reason why this Parking Control Officer tagged each one of these illegally cars parked in the middle of the damn street on Fulton in Civic Center yesterday. A passerby from some do-good organization shared a few words about how DPT doesn’t tag cars parked in this fashion on Sundays.

The PCO said she was doing as she was told, and then proceeded to write $60 citations in this target-rich environment.

Can you see one of the tickets? Can you see the PCO?

Whenever you feel that parking laws don’t apply to you because you’re part of a special group and DPT has a tradition of non-enforcement, you shouldn’t feel angry when the rules all of a sudden start getting enforced.

You should be happy about all the tickets you avoided when you parked for free all those many weeks, months or years. Plus, it’s a piece of cake parking legally for free in Civic Center on Sundays.

So, you’re all set to motor on the streets of San Francisco with your high-performance vehicle and then…

Disaster! Some funeral procession is blocking you even though you have the green light. It’s just like Critical Mass, except these car parades can show up at any time. Do you really have to listen to these “funeral cops” when they try to block your vehicle’s path?

Maybe. See below.

Per Tom Marshall, a CHP spokesman in HQ in Sacramento:

“The Vehicle Code says any person who disregards any traffic signal or direction given by a peace officer authorized to escort funeral processions in uniform shall be guilty of an infraction and subject to penalties.

“The Vehicle Code is silent on non-peace officers performing funeral-escort duty.

“However, we would recommend that motorists observe the directions of such an escort not only out of respect, but also to avoid danger to themselves and those in the procession.

“It is reasonable that a motorist in a funeral procession is somewhat relying upon the escort’s direction and may not expect someone to not observe their directions.”

What that means is that, especially in places like San Francisco where there are rules for Funeral Precession Escorts, you probably won’t get a ticket for ignoring a so-called “fake cop,” but you very likely will get the blame if you get into an accident.

Choose wisely.

Lane splitting - everybody’s doing it, even SuzukiGirl. But what does John Law think about that?

Q. Can motorcycle riders “split” lanes and ride between other vehicles? A. Lane splitting by motorcycles is permissible but must be done in a safe and prudent manner.

Does lane splitting irritate drivers? Perhaps, but who cares?

Go for it, dOoD. The University of California says lane splitting is good for you. Plus, these days you’ve got the Vatican-certified patron saint of motocycle riders, Columbanus of Bobbio, on your side.

Bonus.

“Filtering forward” through the long line of stalled cagers in front of the San Francisco Oakland Bay Bridge toll booths. Click to expand:

“Please please please don’t give me a ticket.”

This is the scene today in the Haight - a wounded Mercedes Benz just a stone’s throw away from Janis Joplin’s old place up Lyon Street. On the windscreen is a plaintive note from the owner: “Please please please don’t give me a ticket.” As you can see, vandal(s) demolished five of the seven windows.

A timid car owner might have done a little cleanup and taken off, but a brave soul will rely on the good hearts of San Francisco parking control officers.

Success!!! The representative from DPT had mercy and DID NOT issue a hefty ticket for the crime of blocking street cleaners. Doesn’t that just brighten your day?

The Presidio of San Francisco, on the northern waterfront to the left of the newly upscale Ghirardelli Square, hasn’t seen this much action since they filmed The Presidio, starring Sean Connery. It appears that a mounted member of the United States Park Police briefly detained a Google Maps camera car for some sort of driving infraction this morning. Oh noes! Don’t impede this car - it’s gone to some interesting places. It’s not scary at all, right?

So the photo below shows how the magic of Google Street View happens - you can see their method all laid out. In this case, Google is using a brand-spanking-new Toyota Prius gas-electric hybrid (wouldn’t a 50-state VW Jetta TDI diesel get better mileage?) and a rather tall metal mast with mad cameras, GPSes and SICK laser range finders. Click to expand:

Courtesy of damianspain of the San Francisco Bay area. Thanks Damian! Check out his flickrstream for lots of great shots of San Francisco, including a rare blue sky at the North Beach Festival.

(Normally, the Presidio is a quiet place, except for people feuding over the location of the new CAMP museum and the occasional coyote attack. And Hooverball - the kids these days make all sorts of noise throwing their old school medicine balls around.)

Keep up the good work, Google Street View drivers. Just make sure to watch out for The Man (as well as all those sexy pedestrians trying to catch your attention).

[Update: National Park Service employee and Commenter #67 Motorcop_2000 disputes any account that has the Googler getting a ticket. MC_2K indicates that this driver merely got lost and was trying to get "back to the Avenues" (meaning the Richmond or the Sunset districts). Bad driving and Toyota Priuseses seem to go together, so this story rings true.]