Posts Tagged ‘van ness’

This BRT Rendering Shows How Our SFMTA Views Us The People – But Is This a Homeless Person or Just an Old Pushing Groceries?

Wednesday, November 18th, 2015

These are most of the people depicted in this Van Ness BRT proposal from the SFMTA:

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At first I thought the right side showed a stolen metal shopping cart being pushed by a street person, but then I thought it might be a stroller, but then I ENHANCED the image to see it’s a privately-owned folding shopping cart being pushed by I don’t know who.

Of course this isn’t a typical amount of peds you’d expect to find using the crosswalks at this intersection, but perhaps our SFMTA is, once again, being “aspirational.”

And this rendering is a lot better than some we’ve seen in the past, like this urbanist’s fever dream of our already-failed Octavia “Boulevard,” which turned out to be somehow too wide and not wide enough at the same time IRL:


On It Goes…

Arrested Decay: Our Shut-Down McDonalds Already Looks Like It’s Part of a Ghost Town

Tuesday, June 9th, 2015

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My name is McDonalds, King of Burgers:
‘Look on my Dollar Menu, Billions Served, and despair!’
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare, you had it your way
The lone and level parking lot stretches far away

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A Real Estate Empire Masquerading as an Art School – It’s AoA’s World, We’re Just Living In It…

Tuesday, May 5th, 2015

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Monet, bo-ney
Croquet, roset
Chimay, Sheneneh
KKK layaway stay away
Patti Mayonnaise, Doug Funnie
Brown bunny, money, money

Pay me, Baby
Thats SCAD its really rad

Whats really rad, who’s really your dad
R-I-S-D, thats RISD

Toss the Frisbee, Cooper Union
Thats what I’m doin’, thats what I’m doin’
Toss the Frisbee, Cooper Union
Thats what I’m doin’, thats what I’m doin’

Pratt, SVA
Fozzie wakka wakka like lady esé
Pratt, Pratt, SVA
Fozzie wakka wakka like lady esé

Hipsters Spotted Well North of Polk Gulch – Possible Breeding Pair – Nesting Rituals Noted

Tuesday, May 5th, 2015

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A New Way to Hide Cell Phone Towers: Check Out How They’re Doing It at 590 Van Ness near Golden Gate

Thursday, March 26th, 2015

Oh, come on, man!

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What are people supposed to think these things are?

I cry foul.

The Angriest-Looking Travel Trailer Ever: VENGEANCE is Yours, on South Van Ness – A Fifth Wheel “Toy Hauler”

Thursday, February 26th, 2015

You live up front and carry around your ATV or motorcycles or whatever in the back

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Aint that America?

MISSING: Steven Harris – Last Seen at the California Academy of Sciences Jan 6th – Last Ping at Market / Van Ness

Thursday, January 8th, 2015

[UPDATE: “STEVEN HAS BEEN FOUND. He is currently with family.]

OK, here’s the report as far as I know:

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Steven Harris, went missing around 11:00 AM on Tuesday, January 6th, 2015, last seen leaving his job at the California Academy of Sciences in San Francisco. His home is in San Bruno, and his last phone ping was at Market & Van Ness. His family is trying to get any sort of media attention to help bring Steven home.

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Here It Is: The Infamous Line of Double-Parked Cars in Front of Rainbow Grocery – How Do We Solve This Longstanding Problem?

Thursday, December 18th, 2014

I don’t know, but SFGov is powerless, it appears.

Here’s some history on the issue.

And here’s how things look in 2014 – nothing’s changed:

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Oh well…

Here’s How Larry Ellison Runs His Hawaiian Airline: $4000 Bonuses Paid to Pilots at “Island Air” Being Recalled

Tuesday, November 25th, 2014

Why would you give people a bonus right before the holidays and then take it back right before the holidays?

And then you plan on giving the money back* again next year, maybe?

What a mess!

Hey, here’s a solution for LE.

Why not just sell your POS Toyota LFA and then use the proceeds to fund the bonuses?

Oh, here it is, parked on Van Ness in front of the House of Prime Rib:


That would cover it.

(Now, here’s the thing about the LFA. The suits at Toyota felt the program was taking waaaay too long, which it was, so they said, “Forget about the tranny, just finish that car!” So they slapped in a slushbox** and called it a day. That “awful” transmission totally doesn’t match the rest of the car. Oh well! But don’t take my word for it… [“One big giant squirrel.” “Awful transmission.”]

Anyway, this is the kind of thing what makes up your Legacy, Larry.

Don’t you care about your Legacy, Larry?

Or, if not, do you care about unnecessarily pissing off all your pilots? 

*These bonuses weren’t exactly Christmas Bonuses, they were WE’RE FINALLY GETTING NEW AIRPLANES Bonuses. So I guess the Island Air people weren’t happy with the Airbussy prop planes they bought, so now they want to switch over to the Canadian competition? And then there was some kind of bonus for the pilots connected to that. Which planes would be best? Well, you just don’t know. You’ll never know, actually. Perhaps Island Air just doesn’t make sense as a bidness? I’ll tell you, back in the 1990’s people’d be trying to start up inter-island airlines just for the PR value, just to have fun. The idea would be to lose money on the airline (ooh look, we have all-jet aircraft!) to build up goodwill to use for another purpose. It didn’t work out..)

**Look at all those words in Wikipedia about the chassis and engine and then there’s just one line about the awful transmission…

An SFMTA Fantasy for Van Ness – Check Out This Illustration – IRL, Route 101 Will be Filled with Cars, Bumper to Bumper

Thursday, November 20th, 2014

Is this a joke?


This is a joke, right?

School buses in San Francisco? Are we going to have yet another SFUSD consent decree and be busing kids around even more? Actually, SFMTA, the trend is to have less busing and also lots of kids ride on SFMTA buses, as you well know, SFMTA. So why would you show a Van Ness with more school buses than cars?

And also, the number of buses on Van Ness will be greater than the number of people waiting for buses on Van Ness?

What are you smoking, SFMTA?

Sometimes I don’t know.