Posts Tagged ‘viral’

Oh No, Our “Local” Gannett Blog, The Bold Italic, STILL Doesn’t Know That the Fake Video It Posted is Fake

Tuesday, February 25th, 2014

Well here we go, some people took the effort to point out to our “local” Gannett Co Inc blog about one of its many mistakes. And it wasn’t just me, you know, right here: Gull-ible! – Gannett Co Inc’s West Coast Blog Gets Around to Posting a Two-Year Old Video – Oh, But It’s Not a Real Video.

So, Gannett, the charge is that your fake video is fake.

The rejoinder:

Was it?

YES IT WAS.

I mean, it very well may have been

WELL, IF THIS IS YOUR POSITION, THEN WHY NOT JUST SAY “FAKE THIEF-SEAGULL STEALS A GOPRO” INSTEAD?

but we just found people speculating that it was,

OH, IT’S UP TO THE GREATER PUBLIC TO PROVE YOU WRONG AS OPPOSED TO THE OPPOSITE? OK FINE.

and GoPro says they had nothing to do with it. (Though, they could be LYING, or seagulls themselves…)

UH-OH, YOU’RE MISSING THE CASE WHERE GOPRO ISN’T LYING AND SOMEBODY _OUTSIDE_ OF GOPRO PRODUCED THIS FAKE VIDEO, RIGHT?

All right, let’s play along. Do you really think a seagull can pick up a video camera with its webbed feet? If so, you’re naive.

And why do the seabirds of the world only pickup GoPro brand cameras and not Canons or Nikons or Sony Action Cams and whathaveyou?

And what French tourist takes an ordinary sunset video with a monitor-free GoPro in a waterproof case? Not that many, I’ll tell you.

And what of Nathalie Rollandin, what business was she in when she posted that video, only one, of course, the only she’s ever posted on YouTube? Let’s take a look:

Marketing strategy and product launch: concept development and product design, pricing and promotional strategies, training, launch and monitoring of results”

The French tourist turned out to be an Italian-American chick from Chicago. She’s now learning even more about viral marketing ‘n stuff at the Kellogg School. Mmmm

All right, here’s my contribution to the marketing intern fake video oeuvre.

Enjoy:

Actually, mine’s twice as good as yours, because mine has two marketing interns faking a video.

Hey Gannett! What’s your burn rate? Why don’t you move back to Virginia and make room for housing at your reclaimed wood clubhouse on Page? How many millions have you lost so far, The Bold italic, you know, since you all came to town?

Advice to Mouthy White Boys on How to Deal with the SFPD (WITHOUT Getting Arrested)

Monday, February 24th, 2014

1. This is just my experience, but I heard this story (see below) repeated by various people in various locations over the weekend. It could be that this one has gone viral IRL.

2. I’ll tell you, 99+% of the time when an SFPD officer asks people to clear an accident scene, people actually get up and clear the accident scene. By not clearing the scene, you’re basically saying that the peace officer you’re talking to doesn’t have the authoritah to do so. You’re making things personal.

3. If you want to hang about at an accident or crime scene, simply lie. Say, “I seen it, I seen it, I saw the whole thing!” Then you might get upgraded to Witness status and then you’ll actually have a reason for being on scene when the LT comes by to check on things, which happens sometimes.

4. Believe it or not Dude, there are situations where I myself might be asked to arrest you yourself. I’d be very unlikely to do that since I’m not a peace officer. If you sued me for false arrest, I’d have to take you seriously. OTOH, peace officers, such as the very ones you’re crusading against, do have broad powers to arrest people.Do you realize that, Dude?

5. If the SFPD is worried about getting sued, it might be over the privacy rights of those they are assisting. Did you ever think of that, Dude?

6. The SFPD has the highest-paid cops in the world. If officers don’t live in SF it’s because they choose not to live in SF. So yeah, they’ll say SF is “too expensive, but what they mean is that SF is too expensive for what you get. Do you see the difference here, Dude?

7. You don’t know which parts of the story to omit, Dude. You win points for honesty, but you ended up digging your hole deeper.

8. What do you want, a medal for calling 911?

9. Your friends and family and employees might support your struggle, but here’s what most people are thinking, more or less:

…having read the story, if I were to put a percentage for who is at fault in this situation for ending up in jail I’d assign Mr. TechDudeBroDouche 70%, and 30% to over aggressive policing.”

All this means is that you didn’t explain yourself very well, Dude.

All the deets:

Good Samaritan Backfire or How I Ended Up in Solitary After Calling 911 for Help

“I identified myself as the caller to the half dozen police who poured out of squad cars and stepped back onto the sidewalk in front of Radius restaurant. Sgt. Espinoza, short,* stout,* grey and assertive, asked Ben and me whether we had witnessed the accident. We said that we hadn’t, but arrived shortly thereafter. I was standing 15 feet from the scene beside Officer Kaur, a stocky* female* of South Asian** complexion.** She turned to me and abruptly said that I was not needed as a witness and should leave immediately. I told her we were headed home,** just across the way,** when my friend and I encountered the accident;** and that I’d recently broken my elbow** in a similar bike accident** here** and deeply cared about the outcome.**”

*It’s payback time, bitches!

**OMG, TMI, too much information, objection, relevance. Why should the SFPD care about your elbow?

Gull-ible! – Gannett Co Inc’s West Coast Blog Gets Around to Posting a Two-Year Old Video – Oh, But It’s Not a Real Video

Friday, February 21st, 2014

Here’s the video, which was ID’ed as a fake about 2.6 million views ago:

And here’s the recent post from the money-losing Gannet blog, The Bold Italic.

Do you really want to know how to do better, TBI? Well, don’t post crap like this, for starters.

OMG, It’s “Bike Parkour” on the Streets of San Francisco! A Quasi-Corporate, Quasi-Sanctioned Viral YouTube

Tuesday, December 24th, 2013

Not sure about all the legalities involved with the shooting of what amounts to a commercial for Ford Motor Company, but here it is.

Enjoy:

Bike Parkour -Streets of San Francisco!

Stanley Roberts Goes Viral – Video of Sales of Donated / Discarded Glide Memorial Food – Image of San Francisco?

Friday, December 20th, 2013

Well, take a look:

The number of people who have watched this clip is now greater than the number of people who came to town to see the 34th America’s Cup.

The people shown are the very same ones who are shown how to vote (with stencil overlays, seriously) by corrupt non-profits and the same ones who get herded around for protests.

Oh well.

Commemorating the Tenth Anniversary of KRON-TV’s “Bubb Rubb and Lil Sis” Viral Video – Whistle Tips – Whoo Whoo!

Wednesday, May 8th, 2013

At first I just could not believe that this bit would have been aired on a local news channel. I thought I was being punk’d.

But this short video, which is older than YouTube itself, was an actual bit from KRON in 2003:

Will Harper had the follow-up in 2004.

Back then, all we had was Bubb Rubb and the Dancing Baby as viral videos…

Oh Look, It’s Another Staged “Viral Video” From Those GoPro Camera People: “BombSquad Over San Francisco”

Tuesday, November 27th, 2012

Oh look, a Sony Camera what’s better than the GoPro. (For some applications, anyway.  Certainly it’s less dorky-looking, wouldn’t you agree?)

Now, where was I? Oh yes, the GoPro people are back with this month’s purported “viral video.”

It’s called “BombSquad over San Francisco.”

Except it’s not over San Francisco, oh well.

Anyway, watch the editing when Bro almost misses the boat and another Bro has to help him up with the assistance of yet another Bro:

I cry foul.

So, on the one hand, thanks GoPro for taking credit for your staged purported viral video marketing promotion.

And thanks for not using an animal this time.

But no thanks for calling Not San Francisco “San Francisco.”

And no thanks for staging the last landing.

And hey, GoPro, what do you think of the new Sony Action Camera?

It’s kind of sleek, huh? Maybe a little more aerodynamic than your little cubes, you know, when you’re going 100 MPH+?

Oh GoPro, will you ever win?

OMG, It’s Yet Another Mid-Market Camp-Out in Front of Sheikh Shoes – Remember That Big Fight on Market Street?

Wednesday, November 14th, 2012

I do. It was back in the the Summer of 2012 – see below.

Anyway, this was the scene late last night:

Click to expand

Ah mem’ries:

Wow, this one has it all.

Via Bluoz and from the perspective of those in line at the Nike Air Yeezy 2 campout at Sheikh shoes, it’s:

“Air Yeezy 2 Campout Fight in SF”

Just 23 views so far, but this one, she’s a gonna go viral.

“Air Yeezy 2 campout fight in the Tenderloin District of San Francisco. All this happened while we were in line at Shiekh Shoes. This crackhead hopped on the front of the trolly and wouldn’t get off, so when the lady in pink tried to be a hero she got a SMACK SMACK to the face. Air Yeezy campout. Shout out to the homies that were holding my spot down for me while I was at work. Big thanks.”

Color commentary:

“Get her, Grandma!”

“She’s leaking. She’s leaking.” (In reference to AC TRANSIT BUS FIGHT I AM A MOTHERFUCKER, aka AC Transit Bus Fight)

“That’s some crazy shit – laid out under a train.”

Oh, and then a mess of cops showed up.

Of course, the solution to all this is to give Twitter $20,000,000 and its own bus line so it stays in town.

Mayor Ed Lee Gets It Done!

RUN ED, RUN!

Know Your Faked Viral Videos, Made with GoPro Cameras or Not, In San Francisco or Not, Involving Seagulls or Not

Thursday, September 13th, 2012

This one was for Lego Indiana Jones something, recorded in Potrero Hill by the Butler or something ad agency up in Marin County:

Yeah, fake.

For these reasons and more:

And here’s a faked GoPro seagull video made in France:

And here’s the latest, a faked GoPro video made in San Francisco by a woman from France, apparemment, you know, ostensibly:

In closing, GoPro, GoPro, GoPro! Yay for GoPro! Buy one, or three, today!

OMG, Remote Controlled Chopper Video of the Best San Francisco Car Driving Video Ever: Ken Block’s Gymkhana Five

Wednesday, September 12th, 2012

All right, 27 million YouTube Views later, it’s safe to say that Ken Block’s Gymkhana Five was the best thing to ever hit the 415. See below.

But now, via Spots Unknown, there’e this:

A short video of remote controlled helicopter shots of the making of G5.”

It’s like just 1:44 long. Click on it. Go for it, nobody’s looking. I’ll look out for your boss. You know, in HD.

There you go.

Ah, memories:

“Only 305 Views so far, but this one will end up with tens of millions of viewers, soon enough.

Ten minutes – full screen and 1080p please:

So that’s what was going on when the Bay Bridge was shut down that day.

I’m already looking forward to the director’s cut, you know, with outtakes and errors and broken stuff.

And just for the record, San Francisco Film Commission, the kids these days don’t want to see scripted drama crap like NBC’s Trauma, they want to see something interesting. So the sooner you stop subsidizing crap like NBC’s Trauma, the better off we’ll all be…

“DC and Ken Block present Gymkhana FIVE: Ultimate Urban Playground; San Francisco.

Shot on the actual streets of San Francisco, California, GYM5 features a focus on fast, raw and precise driving action. Filmed over four days, director Ben Conrad and his team are back to work on their second Gymkhana production and delivered the entire city of San Francisco as Ken Block’s personal gymkhana playground. DC Shoes also provided fellow DC athlete and longtime Ken Block friend, Travis Pastrana, to make a cameo appearance on his dirtbike, and S.F. resident Jake Phelps of Thrasher Magazine fame also makes a cameo as Block hoons S.F. in his most incredible Gymkhana yet. For more information check us out at http://www.dcshoes.com/auto

And here’s some context:

Jumping Taylor in a Fiesta. Wow:

And in the Financial, on California, near some fake cable cars:

More in Potrero Hill, on Bike to Work Day 2012:

And again in the Financial, being filmed by a radio-controlled chopper whilst being recorded by a Saturday-working, Financial District Dell Jockey:

And Matier and Ross say that there were donuts being done on the Bay Bridge – did anybody see that?

Teaser #1 – Impressive – Drifting on a Barge – Chopper Shot

Teaser #2 – All Talk, No Action – Dirt Bike injury? – Man, They Sure are Teasing Us

Teaser #3 – Oh Ma Gah – Drifting and Jumping at the Same Time – Is This Possible?