Posts Tagged ‘willie’

Holy Toledo! Official San Francisco Contractor AutoReturn Advertises Bible Verses While Towing Cars in the 415?

Friday, November 9th, 2012

WTF is this? Is this a tow truck towing cars in the Financial under authority of the contract AutoReturn has with SFGov?

I think so!

And yet, in addition to charging you $500 for towing away your ride for being just 13 minutes late, AutoReturn wants to be involved with giving you a lecture from the King James.

Check it: 

Click to expand

I cry foul.

For the record, PSALM 23:

The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want.
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures:
He leadeth me beside the still waters.
He restoreth my soul:
He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for His name’ sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil: For thou art with me;
Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies;
Thou annointest my head with oil; My cup runneth over.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the House of the Lord forever.

And then I’ll tow your car.

Sometimes, I just don’t know…

“The colonel’s hostility softened gradually as he applied himself to details. “Now, I want you to give a lot of thought to the kind of prayers we’re going to say. I don’t want anything heavy or sad. I’d like you to keep it light and snappy, something that will send the boys out feeling pretty good. Do you know what I mean? I don’t want any of this Kingdom of God or Valley of Death stuff. That’s all too negative. What are you making such a sour face for?”

“I’m sorry, sir,” the chaplain stammered. “I happened to be thinking of the Twenty-third Psalm just as you said that.”

“How does that one go?”

“That’s the one you were just referring to, sir. ‘The Lord is my shepherd; I—’”

“That’s the one I was just referring to. It’s out. What else have you got?”

“‘Save me, O God; for the waters are come in unto—’”

“No waters,” the colonel decided, blowing ruggedly into his cigarette holder after flipping the butt down into his combed-brass ash tray. “Why don’t we try something musical? How about the harps on the willows?”

“That has the rivers of Babylon in it, sir,” the chaplain replied. “‘…there we sat down, yea, we wept, when we remembered Zion.’”

“Zion? Let’s forget about that one right now. I’d like to know how that one ever got in there. Haven’t you got anything humorous that stays away from waters and valleys and God? I’d like to keep away from the subject of religion altogether if we can.”

The chaplain was apologetic. “I’m sorry, sir, but just about all the prayers I know are rather somber in tone and make at least some passing reference to God.”

“Then let’s get some new ones. The men are already doing enough bitching about the missions I send them on without our rubbing it in with any sermons about God or death or Paradise. Why can’t we take a more positive approach? Why can’t we all pray for something good, like a tighter bomb pattern, for example? Couldn’t we pray for a tighter bomb pattern?”

“Well, yes, sir, I suppose so,” the chaplain answered hesitantly. “You wouldn’t even need me if that’s all you wanted to do. You could do that yourself.”

“I know I could,” the colonel responded tartly. “But what do you think you’re here for? I could shop for my own food, too, but that’s Milo’s job, and that’s why he’s doing it for every group in the area. Your job is to lead us in prayer, and from now on you’re going to lead us in a prayer for a tighter bomb pattern before every mission. Is that clear? I think a tighter bomb pattern is something really worth praying for. It will be a feather in all our caps with General Peckem. General Peckem feels it makes a much nicer aerial photograph when the bombs explode close together.”

Hey, is San Francisco Really a “Sister City” of Paris, France? No – Was It Before? No, Not At All – Here’s Why

Wednesday, September 26th, 2012

Here’s why:

Seule Paris est digne de Rome; seule Rome est digne de Paris. 

Solo Parigi è degna di Roma; solo Roma è degna di Parigi.

Only Paris is worthy of Rome; only Rome is worthy of Paris.

That means that Paris has been “twinned” with Rome in an exclusive sister-city relationship. It’s an “elaborate cultural partnership,” as they say.

So does that mean that Mayor Ed Lie will be lying once again today?

Yep, pretty much.

But you’ve got to realize that things are more or less on autopilot at City Hall these days, so it’s not really his volition.

(And if Willie Brown could get away with something, then Ed Lee should be able to as well, else it’s racist or something.)

Now, here’s what we really have with the City of Light. We have one of these things:

Les pactes d’amitié et de coopération signés par la Ville de Paris

Which in American is “pacts of friendship and cooperation signed by the City of Paris.”

Which, IRL, is rien de bien grave (no biggee). See Below.

IMO, we should be like Dubai, which ID’s itself as a Partner City with Paris.

All right, TTFN. But remember, We’ll Always Never Have Paris.

IRL, Paris, France is friends with just about everybody. The list of partner cities:

2012: San Francisco
2011: Dakar 
2011: Sao Paulo, signed an amendment to the Cooperation Agreement of 2004 
2011: Yerevan 
2011: Rio de Janeiro 
2011: Ramallah, signed a pact of friendship and cooperation inauguration, the Garden of Nations, a bust by French sculptor Emile-Antoine Bourdelle (1861-1929), including Ramallah to Paris 
2010: Doha 
2010: Tel Aviv-Jaffa 
2009: Istanbul 
2009: Quebec 
2009: San Francisco  
2009: Rio de Janeiro 
2009: Quebec 
2009: Jericho 
2009: Istanbul  
2007: Phnom Penh 
2006: Montreal  
2006: Cairo  
2006: Beirut  
2005: Copenhagen  
2004: Tunis  
2004: Sao Paulo 
2004: Rabat  
2004: Casablanca 
2003 St. Petersburg 
2003: Quebec 
2003: Algiers 
2002: Geneva 
2001: Porto Alegre (joint statement) 
2001: London 
2000: Madrid 
2000: Athens 
2000 (updated in 2004): Washington 
1999: Warsaw 
1999: OVA (Arab Towns Organization) 
1999: Mexico 
1999: Buenos Aires 
1999: Amman 
1998: Sydney 
1998: Sofia 
1998: Lisbon 
1998: Yerevan 
1997: Tbilisi 
1997, Santiago  
1997: St. Petersburg 
1997: Riyadh  
1997: Prague 
1997: Beijing 
1996: San Francisco 
1996: Quebec 
1996: Chicago 
1995: Jakarta 
1993: Beirut 
1992: Moscow 
1991: Seoul 
1987: Sanaa  
1987: Berlin 
1987: Amman 
1985: Cairo 
1982: Tokyo 
1958: Kyoto 
1956: Rome (Twin Exclusive)

And in other news, George P. Shultz was a Nixon and Reagan appointee, not a Carter appointee. (You’d be amazed how many people think (or say) he’s a Carter appointee.)

Anywho, ever more deets, including a visit to Le Twitter HQ in the corrupt Twitterloin:

“From September 25 to 28, the mayor of Paris, Bertrand Delanoë, is visiting San Francisco to strengthen ties and cooperation between the two cities.

The mayor of Paris has a full agenda for his stay in California. After a welcome reception at the Consulate of France in San Francisco, he visited two companies Parisoma and Twitter. 27 in the morning, he will go to Parisoma a common workspace, exchange and support for entrepreneurs. Created by the French Stéphane Distinguin, Parisoma accompanied nearly 300 start-up since its inception in 2007.

Bertrand Delanoë must also discover the new headquarters of Twitter in the SoMa district, the famous social network of micro-blogging, along with its CEO Jack Dorsey. With New York, Paris is the city with the most subscribers to his Twitter account, and this year the City of Light became the first in the world to exhibit his tweets in the public space, the place Châtelet.

Paris delegation has always aimed to encourage more trade with San Francisco, mainly on economic and technological. Several meetings with the mayor of this city, Edwin Lee, are well planned and Bertrand Delanoë is expected to sign a memorandum with him, in line with those of 2006 and 2009 to facilitate cooperation. This will be an opportunity to discuss joint projects twinned towns and to consider connections between the research teams.”

 

Today on KQED-FM at 10:00AM: “Critical Mass, 20 Years Later” – Michael Krasny – Commute Clot Anniv.

Monday, September 24th, 2012

Well, today’s the start of San Francisco Critical Mass Week 2012.

Michael Krasny of KQED Forum will kick things off with a one-hour show on the history of Critical Mass.

And then festivities will end, of course, this Friday with the big 20th Anniversary Ride the evening of September 28th, 2012. (Not that you’d know it from the San Francisco Bicycle Coalition website’s ”Chain of Events” section, where all info about CM* is now censored.)

Suddenly surrounded by bicycles:

All the deets:

“It started with a bike ride in San Francisco on Sept. 25, 1992. About 50 people cycled in a pack along Market Street, hoping to earn some respect from drivers who sometimes ignored them or edged them off the road. They called it the “Commute Clot.” Today it’s known as Critical Mass, a movement that’s spread worldwide. Supporters say it promotes cycling and the rights of bicyclists. But critics say it is illegal, clogs traffic and antagonizes drivers. We talk about Critical Mass’ 20th anniversary, and its effects on the city.

Host: Michael Krasny

Guests:

Chris Carlsson, co-founder of Critical Mass who was part of the first ride on Sept. 25, 1992, and has since participated in Critical Mass rides in Milan, Vancouver and Porto Alegre, Brazil

Hugh D’Andrade, founder of SFCriticalMass.org

Rob Anderson, blogger on transportation issues and author of the blog District 5 Diary

Tune in at 10:00 on your radio or on your device, Listen Live.

*The SFBC raises money through fees but it also gets mucho dinero directly from SFGov. So that’s why it endorsed Ed Lee for Mayor even though SFBC’s members generally did not and still do not like Ed Lee. Similarly, Chrstina Olague, Mayor Ed Lee’s hand-picked recruit for District 5 Supervisor, gets endorsed over Julian Davis even though SFBC members actually favor JD. The SFBC is basically a quasi-government agency now, so it’s very afraid of seeming to say something negative about certain members of the City Family. It’s also afraid of hurting the chances of its officers someday getting jobs / health care directly with SFGov / SFMTA. Anyway, that’s why the SFBC is basically a SFGov kiss-ass these days. It will lobby San Francisco government, certainly, but that’s about as far as it wants to go. (Think about it – who would the SFMTA endorse for Mayor?)

Another Salvo Against that “AutoReturn” Towing Company from One of Its “Victims,” Writer CW Nevius

Tuesday, August 14th, 2012

Here’s the latest anti-Auto Return bit from CW Nevius.

I don’t know, Neve, what do you want? It sounds like you want the City Family to fight harder for the Commonweal, to make better deals when it deals with private companies.

And that’s fine, but you’re a little inconsistent, you dig?

Speaking of digging, what about the corrupt Central Subway project? The last you wrote about that was all the way back in 2008. Why is it that you write about little fish like Auto Return but not big fish like, I don’t know, AECOM?

Oh what’s that, you actually think the Central Subway is a horrible execution of a bad idea but you don’t want to offend all your sources in the City Family? That’s pretty weak, Neve.

Or what about the America’s Cup boondoggle that you used to cheer lead for so much. Didn’t The City strike a bad deal with AC34?

And what about Recology? You seem to support that expensive monopoly and its dealings.

But that’s small potatoes compared with the deal San Francisco made with Auto Return?

What do you want, you want to get rid of the AutoReturn contract and then hire a bunch of expensive new City employees to tow cars? I guarantee you that that would cost SF more money.

Or maybe you want tow fees to be increased overall in order to subsidize police tows?

Or maybe you want revenge against the company what towed your ride last year, you know, when you were a naive newcomer in the 415?

I think that’s it!

We’ve made a lot of progress today, CW. Leave your check with my secretary on the way out…

Ah, mem’ries:

The Biggest Mistake That AutoReturn Towing Company Ever Made was Towing C.W. Nevius Earlier This Year

Right? ‘Cause after the car of C.W. Nevius got towed in February, he stepped up his campaign against AutoReturn, the company what gets called by DPT / SFMTA when your car is blocking rush hour traffic.

So nowadays, he considers San Francisco’s policy of towing away cars blocking rush hour lanes a “scam,” which means he thinks the whole process is a “fraudulent business scheme.”

Does he think that the SFMTA should just leave cars untouched, making all those “NO STOPPING, NO PARKING” signs merely advisory?

It’s not clear.

Oh well.

AutoReturn: Our name makes us sound like we’re a department of the SFPD – isn’t that funny? WERE UNDER UR FREEWAY, DETAINING UR CARZ:

Click to expand

Now, what the Auto Return tow truck driver should have done was make up some excuse instead of towing the ride of The Nevius on that Fateful Day. You know, “technical difficulties” or something like that to buy some more time for the San Francisco Chronicle’s least intelligent employee. That would have allowed the Neve to correct his mistake by simply hopping in and driving off to the East Bay or wherever the hell he lives these days.

It wouldn’t be hard to implement a NO TOW NEVIUS policy. You know, back in the day, Willie Brown used to get pulled over all the time by the CHP when he was driving waaaaay too fast* on the I-80 back and forth to Sacramento. After Willie got stopped twice in one trip, he put a hold on the CHP’s budget. So the CHP issued Willie’s photo to all the officers on I-80 with instructions to “memorize this face” in order to give Willie favorable treatment. (Read the whole story below.) The point is that AutoReturn should find which cars CW Nevius parks illegally on the Streets of San Francisco and then give a picture of each one to all their tow truck drivers and then tell them“DO NOT TOW THESE PARTICULAR CARS!”

Bingo bango.

“From UC Press E-Books Collection, 1982-2004 (formerly eScholarship Editions), it’s: 

Willie Brown, A Biography by James Richardson

From four decades ago, Chapter 15, Mr. Chairman:

“One afternoon Brown briskly walked into a budget conference committee meeting late and looking angry. He immediately sat down next to [Senator] Collier and asked for a “point of personal privilege.” Collier granted him the courtesy, and Brown asked to return to an item in the budget to appropriate funds to purchase guns and other equipment for the California Highway Patrol. Brown then demanded that the funds be deleted from the budget. The trust between the two was so great that Collier asked no questions, immediately complied, and struck the CHP equipment appropriation.

At the end of the meeting, [aide Robert] Connelly asked his boss what was going on with the Highway  Patrol. “He was so mad, he wouldn’t talk about it.” Finally, Brown told Connelly that he had been stopped not once but twice by CHP officers that day on his way to Sacramento from San Francisco along Interstate 80 in his bright red Porsche. Each time, the officers walked over to Brown and said, “Hey, boy, where’d you get this car?”

Connelly quickly found the CHP’s lobbyist and told him what had happened. “The guy’s eyeballs rolled clear back into his skull. He said, ‘We’ll fix it.’” By the next morning, the CHP was distributing photographs of Willie Brown to officers along the Interstate 80 corridor between San Francisco and Sacramento with orders to “memorize this face.” The CHP got its appropriation back—and more.

Brown championed pay raises for CHP officers by authoring a bill that tied their salaries to a formula based on the salaries of large municipal police forces. The measure gave Highway Patrol officers a windfall raise, and then an automatic pay raise every time one of the unionized city forces got a new contract.”

*You’d see him go past as a red blur, hauling ass. He had a Porsche 911, a Mazda Miata (sold to him at a discount, you know, cause Willie is special), an Acura NSX (sold to him at a discount, per the instructions of Honda USA, you know, because Willie is special), and others.

The Biggest Mistake That AutoReturn Towing Company Ever Made was Towing C.W. Nevius Earlier This Year

Tuesday, October 25th, 2011

Right? ‘Cause after the car of C.W. Nevius got towed in February, he stepped up his campaign against AutoReturn, the company what gets called by DPT / SFMTA when your car is blocking rush hour traffic.

So nowadays, he considers San Francisco’s policy of towing away cars blocking rush hour lanes a “scam,” which means he thinks the whole process is a “fraudulent business scheme.”

Does he think that the MTA should just leave cars untouched, making all those “NO STOPPING, NO PARKING” signs merely advisory?

It’s not clear.

Oh well.

AutoReturn: Our name makes us sound like we’re a department of the SFPD – isn’t that funny? WERE UNDER UR FREEWAY, DETAINING UR CARZ:

Click to expand

Now, what the Auto Return tow truck driver should have done was make up some excuse instead of towing the ride of The Nevius on that Fateful Day. You know, “technical difficulties” or something like that to buy some more time for the San Francisco Chronicle’s least intelligent employee. That would have allowed the Neve to correct his mistake by simply hopping in and driving off to the East Bay or wherever the hell he lives these days.

It wouldn’t be hard to implement a NO TOW NEVIUS policy. You know, back in the day, Willie Brown used to get pulled over all the time by the CHP when he was driving waaaaay too fast* on the I-80 back and forth to Sacramento. After Willie got stopped twice in one trip, he put a hold on the CHP’s budget. So the CHP issued Willie’s photo to all the officers on I-80 with instructions to “memorize this face” in order to give Willie favorable treatment. (Read the whole story below.) The point is that AutoReturn should find which cars CW Nevius parks illegally on the Streets of San Francisco and then give a picture of each one to all their tow truck drivers and then tell them “DO NOT TOW THESE PARTICULAR CARS!”

Bingo bango.

“From UC Press E-Books Collection, 1982-2004 (formerly eScholarship Editions), it’s: 

Willie Brown, A Biography by James Richardson

From four decades ago, Chapter 15, Mr. Chairman:

“One afternoon Brown briskly walked into a budget conference committee meeting late and looking angry. He immediately sat down next to [Senator] Collier and asked for a “point of personal privilege.” Collier granted him the courtesy, and Brown asked to return to an item in the budget to appropriate funds to purchase guns and other equipment for the California Highway Patrol. Brown then demanded that the funds be deleted from the budget. The trust between the two was so great that Collier asked no questions, immediately complied, and struck the CHP equipment appropriation.

At the end of the meeting, [aide Robert] Connelly asked his boss what was going on with the Highway  Patrol. “He was so mad, he wouldn’t talk about it.” Finally, Brown told Connelly that he had been stopped not once but twice by CHP officers that day on his way to Sacramento from San Francisco along Interstate 80 in his bright red Porsche. Each time, the officers walked over to Brown and said, “Hey, boy, where’d you get this car?”

Connelly quickly found the CHP’s lobbyist and told him what had happened. “The guy’s eyeballs rolled clear back into his skull. He said, ‘We’ll fix it.’” By the next morning, the CHP was distributing photographs of Willie Brown to officers along the Interstate 80 corridor between San Francisco and Sacramento with orders to “memorize this face.” The CHP got its appropriation back—and more.

Brown championed pay raises for CHP officers by authoring a bill that tied their salaries to a formula based on the salaries of large municipal police forces. The measure gave Highway Patrol officers a windfall raise, and then an automatic pay raise every time one of the unionized city forces got a new contract.”

*You’d see him go past as a red blur, hauling ass. He had a Porsche 911, a Mazda Miata (sold to him at a discount, you know, cause Willie is special), an Acura NSX (sold to him at a discount, per the instructions of Honda USA, you know, because Willie is special), and others.

Wow, the WillieBrownGavinNewsomEdLee-Approved Corrupt Twitterloin Never Looked So Good – “You Stay Classy!”

Wednesday, October 19th, 2011

Wow, this one has it all – MUNI’s aqua blue DC Transit #1076, these green Market Street bike lanes, and the Furniture Mart Building, whose former owner created the Twitterloin with a little help from King Willie II, Gavin Newsom.

Of course, King Willie I, the original, is taking credit for the corrupt Twitterloin as well, as is King Willie III, Ed Lee.

A fantastic capture from Nick Fisher:

Click to expand

TARGET Just Keeps on Giving to San Franciscans – Lucky “Eva E” Finds Golden Ticket in Colma

Tuesday, July 27th, 2010

The next time some allegedly rich allegedly yuppie-types* say something like, “…San Franciscans are supposedly ["supposedly?" what?] going elsewhere such as Colma and Serramonte for their department store fix….,” you can just point to the case of San Francisco resident Eve E. Why? Well, she just made a surprising discovery after making a run for the border to do a little shopping at one of the busiest tar-GHEY stores in the world.

Per NESTLE USA:

“The first lucky winner, Eva E. of San Francisco, presented her shiny Golden Ticket to WONKA for official verification, and it has been verified as the first genuine WONKA Golden Ticket! WONKA’s Golden Ticket delivers the Grand Prize of a lifetime: a trip around the world for the winner and three guests. The prize is worth up to $40,000.”

(You can actually go out and buy a WONKA bar? Did not know that, no sir.)

What it’s like to discover the Golden Ticket:

Charlie Bucket was lucky to have a Target near where he was living…

*Is that a slur or an attack? “Rich, Young, Urban, and Professional” – I don’t think so…

All the deets:

Extra! Extra! First Two WONKA Golden Tickets Found!

Only Eight Coveted Tickets Remain in America’s Search for “Gold”

GLENDALE, Calif., July 27 — The hunt for WONKA’s legendary Golden Tickets is now more intense than ever. Inspired by the grand search in the beloved WONKA story, new WONKA® Exceptionals chocolate bars were distributed across the country, and a WONKA Golden Ticket was placed inside 10 of them. Today, WONKA announced that two of 10 Golden Tickets have been found.

The first lucky winner, Eva E. of San Francisco, presented her shiny Golden Ticket to WONKA for official verification, and it has been verified as the first genuine WONKA Golden Ticket!WONKA’s Golden Ticket delivers the Grand Prize of a lifetime: a trip around the world for the winner and three guests. The prize is worth up to $40,000.

The second winner, Jason C. of Southaven, Miss., had his Golden Ticket verified not long after Eva.

“We’re thrilled for Eva and Jason, and can’t wait to hear more about the adventures they have planned for their globetrotting journeys,” said Patricia Bowles, spokesperson, Nestle Confections & Snacks. “This serves as a good reminder that only eight WONKA Golden Tickets remain to be found. We look forward to celebrating as more Ticket holders come forward.”

Eva found her Golden Ticket in a WONKA Exceptionals Chocolate Waterfall Bar purchased at a Target® store in Colma, Calif. Jason found his in a WONKA Exceptionals Domed Dark Chocolate Bar at his local Walmart® store in Southaven, Miss. The WONKA Chocolate Waterfall Bar and Domed Dark Chocolate Bar are two-of-three varieties of new WONKA Exceptionals chocolates (the third is the Scrumdiddlyumptious Chocolate Bar). The collection of delicious chocolate can be purchased at retailers nationwide.

As for the first two Grand Prize winners, where will they go? What do they plan to do, and who will they take with them? One thing is certain: they will only be limited by their imaginations!

Ever more deets from our corporate overlords, after the jump

(more…)

Mayor Willie Brown Parties at the WashBag – What Decade is This?

Thursday, March 12th, 2009

This was the scene when former San Francisco Mayor and urban planner Willie Brown dropped by the newly reopened Washington Square Bar and Grill in North Beach. The place was packed last night, with slightly more than the maximum occupancy of 103 souls. Read about “bachelor” Willie L. Brown, Jr. and the Washington Square Bar and “Grille” here in the LATimes. (And read about the night’s “weirdness” here, from Steven T. Jones.)

It’s the 1970′s all over again. The WashBaG is BACK, baby!

Click to expand

Here’s what they said about the WashBag the before it closed last year:

“This SF landmark, re-opened after being painstakingly restored, is a perfect time capsule of Herb Cain-era North Beach, when writers, politicians, musicians, professional athletes and charmingly crooked cops all schmoozed, boozed and occasionally ate here. Gimmick-free and defiantly old-school, “The Washbag” clings to its history with memorabilia and framed black-and-whites of local icons…”

The only thing missing was writer Herb Caen, but he was there in spirit, embracing his beloved North Beach, in a way.

Herb Caen Way, a “25-foot-wide pedestrian promenade, running 3.2 miles along the waterfront next to the Embarcadero from South Beach to Fisherman’s Wharf.”

Long Live the Washbag