Posts Tagged ‘xam’

San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee Writes His Big America’s Cup 2013 Op-Ed on an iPhone? – Hilarity Ensues – “Ailing, Sailing”

Thursday, July 12th, 2012

Wow. Last night’s deficient op-ed from San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee is still live this AM on the San Francisco Examiner website, as Erin Sherbert notes in the category of  “Media, WTF?”

Here it is: Yacht race, opportunity sailing in sailing in sailiong in ailing in in

Oh, this just came in from Rewrite:

(You see, the easy way to remember Isle of “Wight” is to think of all the rich white people that the America’s Cup is for.)

I wonder if the “Largest Newspaper in San Francisco and San Mateo Counties” actually printed this boner as-is hundreds of thousands of times.

Oh well.

As with the similarly-ailing Central Subway project, it appears that, once again, the City Family is failing us with the whole America’s Cup deal. Too bad San Diego* can’t take this white elephant (white whale?) yacht race off our hands.**

Oh well.

[UPDATE: Here’s the fix – “Yacht race, opportunity sailing in.” (So your big America’s Cup editorial headline doesn’t use the phrase America’s Cup? OK fine, but your hed looks like the start of a haiku now…)

*A place where it might actually make sense to build and race 72-foot-tall catamarans. I’ll tell you, it sure doesn’t make sense to do it in the Bay Area. Even Larry Ellison hisself recognizes this fact now.

**Yeah, Fun Diego actually had an AC preview race not too long ago but nobody cared, the “expected” crowds didn’t show. So the City Family members who went down there from the 415 to see how SD would handle the massive crowds ended up bored and ended up heading home early. 

And the Award for America’s Thinnest Big-City Newspaper Goes To … Today’s San Francisco Examiner, June 4, 2012

Monday, June 4th, 2012

Boy, I’ll tell you, today’s San Francisco Examiner is like really thin.

[Call and response] “HOW THIN IS IT?!”

It’s so thin that just one ad composes ten percent of it. I’m srlsy.

I don’t know, are they taking pulp out of the newsprint to save money? Sure feels that way. Today’s issue is super thin, even for an Examiner.

But at least the advertisers are better than before. So there’s no “Platinum Gas Saver” scam on page 3, like before. And the super-jumbo horoscope is gone, so that’s nice.

In their place are ads for the Dolan Law Firm (heh), and “Real Hook Ups Real Fast (Ahora en Espanol, 18+), and “ATTENTION MEN” with an offer of a “Test Dose of Medication, to prove it works* in 10 minutes”

OK fine.

But no matter.

I’ll still pick up a copy of the ‘Xam every day.


*Uh, are there really medical offices way up at the 1700 block of Montgomery, deep in NIMBY territory? I guess there are. And then you take the “test dose” and wait ten minutes to see how your wiener reacts while listening to the Wild Parrots of Telegraph Hill? Sign me up!

How Not to Park Your Mercedez Benz on the Streets of San Francisco

Tuesday, June 23rd, 2009

Whether or not you get a ticket for parking the rear of your Mercedesin traffic on Gough Street, you probably shouldn’t do it anyway.  

Did the driver even try here?

Click to expand:

IMG_7810 copy

Doesn’t look that way.

Using a San Francisco Examiner to See How Far You Parked from the Curb

Wednesday, May 27th, 2009

We’re living in a society here, people. So even though the Man gives allows you a foot and a half spacing from your tires to the curb, you can do better than that. Check out this Mercedes SUV – see how far it is from the curb? Why not use one of the many San Francisco Examiner newspapers that some billionaire from Colorado has seen fit to have strewn about the place?

If a ‘Xam can fit betwixt the curb and your wheel, then you gots to try again. Two Xams away is way too much. PARKING FAIL. Bikes belong in traffic, as they say – you want to make things easier for everybody else, right? With practice, you should be able to get it down to a quarter Xam or less.

Click to expand.

Lots of room for improvement here on Fell Street. (In mitigation, the Mercedes ML driver did manage to retract the outside rear view mirrors. Ten points for Gryffindor.)

If you can’t handle this simple task, maybe you shouldn’t be driving.

Just saying.